The sacrifices I made for love have been many but leaving to start life in another country was a huge one. Leaving the U.S. was a hard decision. I didn’t want to but it needed to be done because I was pregnant at the time and I didn’t have a choice. Oh, I could have stayed where I was but I was in “LOVE” and love makes you do things that you wouldn’t do otherwise.
One of the hardest things I had to cope with when I got here was not being able to speak the language and a culture that was in many ways alien to mine. Being heavy with child did not help matters much either. The newness of the place didn’t set too well especially when I couldn’t communicate what I wanted and needed. Independence was out the door and I was dependent on the in-laws and my new husband for help and that didn’t set too well with me either.
I did eventually learn the language, it was that or give up and go back home. I did grasp how everything worked in the village and even learned to like it. However, my advice to someone who is planning the same is to take a good hard look and to have a backup plan if everything goes down south. Love doesn’t last as I found out and the sacrifices I made in the name of love didn’t matter when I found myself alone in a country that was not mine.
It took time, focus, energy and learning to speak the language to feel at home here. Also, having a son meant that I had to somehow manage and to make this place my home. Being able to speak the language almost fluently has helped and of course integrating in a closed society is a must and that is another hurdle altogether. Not everyone is able to overcome what it takes and I have known many women through the years who gave up, packed their belongings and went back to where they came from. Sacrifice is defined as giving up (something valued) for the sake of other considerations so do not let your heart rule. Love is fleeting at best so think beyond that when making the decision to sacrifice what you are used to and to move to another country. Would I do it again? Knowing what I know now, I would say a definite NO!
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