“I’m not really a control freak but…..can I show you the right way to do that?” Unknown
In the Wizard of Oz, Dorothy gets on the Yellow Brick Road which will take her through Oz to the Emerald City where she hopes to meet the great and powerful Wizard. In the dating world, it could be the path to your one true love but alas it could also lead you to the big bad wolf, the one who will huff and puff and try to blow your house down!
Someone with a control freak personality is defined as “a person who tries to make others do things the way that they want, even if the other people prefer to do it another way, and even if the initial person has no good reason for interfering. More specifically, “a person who feels an obsessive need to put excessive control over themselves and others and to take command of any situation.”
Some reasons for this kind of behavior according to verywellhealth.com is that it provides the individual with “a sense of predictability, stability, and order.”
I wonder if we are giving too many “outs” to these individuals by trying to justify why they are this or that way? Perhaps the only explanation for this personality disorder is that these individuals have a nasty streak within them and “control” as they see it is just part and parcel of their daily existence. It’s my way or the highway and they’ve learned to get away with their obnoxious behavior.
What are the signs of controlling behaviour? According to Webmd.com, these individuals have the following behavior traits.
They insist on having things their way even when it comes to small issues that come down to personal choice.
They refuse to accept blame. You are to blame as far as they are concerned.
They need to be the center of attention and they love upstaging you. In the limelight is where they want to stand even if they have to stand on their heads to do it!
They’re unpredictable. One minute you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread and the next you are dirt under their feet. If you want to be on an emotional roller coaster then you are with the right person!
They lie because they want to control your reality. If you try to contradict them, then you’re the crazy one.
They want to be in charge of finances. They want to handle all of the money. It’s a way to place controls on you.
They dictate where you go and what you do. Controlling your movements gives them the upper hand in the relationship. They love sitting in the power seat. Threats, intimidation or anger are all used skillfully to get what they want.
Another name for this kind of abusive controlling behavior is “intimate terrorism.”
“If I was meant to be controlled, I would have come with a remote.” Kushandwizdom
Most are hard to spot but if you keep your eyes wide open and your senses tuned, sooner or later you will see through the niceness after one or two dates. If not, you’ll notice the signs as you get to know them. They get upset because you’re smiling too much or because you don’t want to move as quickly as they do or something whatever it is triggered something in them, most times you don’t even know what that is. Suddenly you realize that you are being watched and scrutinized for everything you do. Life with these individuals is like walking through a minefield hoping you don’t accidentally step on one and blow yourself up. It is more than stressful to say the least so if you spot them, DISCARD and move on. Dating is stressful enough as it is but if you find yourself being caged in, WALK AWAY!
“As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible!” Unknown
Uh….Uh, NO THANK YOU!
Site Title 