What is it? It is the fear of being afraid. In other words, it is the fear of fear. Even though I’ve had a fear of developing fears or phobias, it never stopped them from finding me and me walking in like sheep to the slaughter! You name it, I’ve had them or have them!
The fear of a broken heart was one of my biggest fears and no matter how hard I tried, it always found me. The fear of the unknown was another. I always wanted to know the outcome before it happened and we know that life doesn’t work that way. It loves surprises and it gave me plenty of those! The fear of walking into a room full of strangers was another. However, I’ve overcome that fear. I do it like a pro now. How did I overcome that fear? I had to work on my self-esteem and every time someone gave me a compliment, I learned to accept it with grace instead of deflecting it as I usually do. Slowly, but surely I saw “me” with different eyes. I was fully capable of achieving anything if I put my mind to it and it worked!
The fear of creepy crawlies was another fear, of closed spaces yet another, and the fear of ghosts. It came from living in Asia and having experienced things that go bump in the night. Should I go on? I’ve got plenty more but I’ll stop right here. Enough don’t you think?
All I can say is that I’ve come a long ways from letting everything scare me. I’m at a place in my life where I live alone, take care of things on my own, and I’m learning to LOVE it, much more than I should. What about the fear? I’ve shown some fears the door and others are on their way out. Just a matter of time before that happens.
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