March 2024 – Page 2

Needle in a Haystack

Looking for the needle in a haystack is defined as “something that is almost impossible to find because it is hidden among so many other things,” or it could mean that you are very unlikely indeed to find it.

Someone once said to me that I choose to be alone. If I didn’t want to be alone, I would already be in a relationship. I disagree with this assumption. Choosing a partner needs to be a well-thought out, well-planned affair. Grabbing any guy who comes along is easy but that one elusive person, the one who fits the mold and the one who offers long-term is really hard to find. The needle in the haystack is elusive, impossible to find and at times the end goal is disappointing and yet I keep looking. Am I trying too hard? It has been said that when you go looking for something, you never find it but when you stop looking, there it is right before your eyes.

“If you hunt for a needle in a haystack you don’t find it. If you don’t give a darn whether you ever see the needle or not – it runs into you the first time you lean against the stack.” P. G. Wodehouse

Perhaps there is some truth to this quote but alas Mr. Wodehouse, my problem is that I keep missing the haystack altogether! I want to zero in on that haystack where the needle is hidden but each haystack I find seems to be the wrong one and I walk past without exploring further. Picky? Definitely. I have this “perfect guy” image etched in my mind and that right there is the problem. He is in my mind and the others don’t measure up. At this rate, I don’t think I’m going to find him no matter how many frogs I kiss not that I’ve kissed that many. I walk off before the kiss happens and look towards the distance for the next Prince Charming to come riding in on his white horse but it never fails, they are missing one thing or another and sometimes they ride in with no horse at all!

How do you find that needle in the haystack?

The answer – “the way you find an actual needle in an actual haystack – is to burn the haystack to the ground. What you’ll be left with is the needle, because metal doesn’t burn.” Jennie Young

If that fails, “Needle in the haystack’s easy – just bring a magnet.” Keith DeCandido

Fine and good and even funny to an extent but that guy living rent-free in my head needs to materialize in front of me so that we can ride off into the sunset together. Please universe, if you are listening make it happen before the next frog rolls around with his lips puckered for that all elusive kiss!

The Journey

Edmund Hillary once said, “It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.” There is much truth in that one statement. In order to conquer the mountain, metaphorically speaking, we have to conquer ourselves first.

More often than not, we place lines and boundaries around ourselves that stop us from moving forward, both knowingly and unknowingly. I have talked about the stories we tell in another article and it still stands true. The narratives we tell keeps us from achieving goals we set for ourselves. We say, “I can’t,” which is often the first response. What if we changed that narrative to, “I can.” Worth trying?

The thing I need to conquer first and foremost is fear. This four-letter word has kept me from achieving so much in my life. Whatever comes my way is usually DOA because fear steps in and tells me why I am incapable of doing something which might sound rational at the time but it is usually only in my head. The fear factor has kept me safe BUT it has also stopped me from experiencing life at its fullest. I know I need to break out of the well-insulated cocoon I am in and test the waters, or at least to get my feet wet. Not saying you should throw caution to the wind but talking about those small steps to conquer that mountain called life.

“Each of us must confront our own fears, must come face to face with them. How we handle our fears will determine where we go with the rest of our lives. To experience adventure or to be limited by the fear of it.” Judy Blume

Overcoming obstacles is next in line. My first reaction to any obstacle is to cringe and than I tend to shy away from it. Perhaps normal behavior in the grand scheme of things but it would be so much easier if I looked it, whatever it is, in the eye and made a conscious decision to break it down to what it really is. Most times, it is a wrinkle rather than a mountain that I in my innate human self make it out to be. I am learning but it takes time.

“Obstacles are like wild animals. They are cowards but they will bluff you if they can. If they see you are afraid of them….they are able to spring upon you; but if you look them squarely in the eye, they will slink out of sight.” Orison Swett Marden.

Acceptance is hard and most times I go through an almost impossible obstacle course of my own making before I can say, “It’s going to be alright. I have accepted the unchangeable and it is time to move on.” This step never comes easily and it takes time but that again is the intricate ways of life or simply of my own choosing. The important thing is that I am learning to accept and letting go instead of giving up and kow-towing and accepting defeat. I want to get to the top of the mountain with bells ringing and with my sanity intact! I still have a long ways to go but I am making progress.

“Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and that there’s got to be a way through it.” Michael J. Fox

However, there is no point in setting out on a journey when there are no clear cut goals because running around in circles is a waste of time and having the courage to know and accept what is needed to make that journey is the way to go. Start with yourself. Be strong enough to get rid of what is not needed, set your focus and start moving to the end goal. Light up your soul, eradicate the stumbling blocks of which there are many I am sure, move with purpose and look towards the path in front of you, one small step at a time. This is exactly what I plan to do.

“Aim for the sky, but move slowly, enjoying every step along the way, it is all those little steps that make the journey complete.” Unknown

Why Not Trump?

There are many reasons why “Orange Jesus” should not get within spitting distance of the White House again let alone take up the business of running the country from the bully pulpit.

At the top of the list of why Donald J. Trump should not be president of the United States is that the man believes that he is entitled to act with impunity and without any restrictions placed on him. He firmly believes that as the president of the United States, he is free to do whatever he likes and not be held ACCOUNTABLE for it. However, the truth of the matter is that the president is accountable to the Constitution, to the Congress and to the nation and that it is not a one-man show as he so believes.

Besides that, Trump has shown time and again that he is dishonest, a bully, manipulative, narcissistic and “crotch-grabbing” in his world is an added incentive to being rich and powerful and NOT a sign of disrespect to women. Add to that no remorse, no empathy, no conscience, no awareness of what is right and wrong and a full-blown ego that will not take a beating and you have a “monster” in the making. Why is he still in the running and made it this far? God only knows!

Lastly, citizen Trump is not very intelligent. We see this in his limited grasp of his vocabulary and the use of the English language. It is riddled with a few adjectives all speaking to the “ME” concept. It is ALL about him. Self-importance is his mainstay and add stupidity to that and you have a clown who knows not of what he speaks. Mind-boggling that he has made it this far.

The man will have substantial authority and power if he makes it to the White House again and that is a frightening prospect. If he makes it to the pinnacle of power, he will vent and throw his temper tantrums as he has done before and that is a given. He will not only be a danger to the country but to the people and the world as a whole. That folks is more than unsettling and downright dangerous.