Three men were out golfing one day and one of them hit his ball into the woods. He went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to him, “If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes on one condition to be named later.”
The man freed the frog and the frog said, “Thank you, but the condition is that whatever you wish for, your wife will get 10 times more or better!” The man said, “Oh, that would be okay,” and for his first wish he wanted to be the most handsome man in the world. The frog warned him, “You do realize this wish will also make your wife ten times better looking and the most beautiful woman in the world, and that men will flock to her.” The man replied, “That is okay, because I will be the most handsome man and she will only have eyes for me.” So, poof – he’s the most handsome in the world!
For his second wish, he wanted to be the richest man in the world. The frog said, “That will make your wife ten times richer, thus the richest person in the world.” The man said, “That is okay, because what is mine is hers, and what is hers is mine.” So, poof – he’s the richest man in the world!
The frog then inquired about his third wish and the man answered, “I’d like a mild heart attack….”
I want to find that frog!
A man gets on an airplane and sits next to a beautiful woman. He asks her where she is going. Her reply is that she is going to a nymphomaniac convention. He asks, “What do you learn at a convention like that?”
She says, “I have learned about many myths. Like the myth that Frenchmen are the best lovers. Jewish men are the best lovers. Another myth that I’ve learned about is that African men have the largest sex organs. It’s not African. It’s the American Indian, but I feel a little strange telling you all this when I don’t even know you. What is your name?”
The man thought for a minute and said, “Tonto, Tonto Goldstein.”
Smart guy!
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