It’s easy to blame someone or something for where we’re at in life, isn’t it? We, as humans, tend to look for excuses and reasons as to why we’re at a low point in life. It’s easy to say, “You’re the reason why or this happened and that’s the reason why.”
Perhaps we should turn it around and ask ourselves how much of the blame do we carry ourselves? Sure, there are reasons, excuses and sometimes legit circumstances for looking for somewhere or someone to place the blame on, however, if you’re honest with yourself, much of the responsibility lies on your shoulders and yours alone.
People can trigger certain outcomes but it is how you decide to deal with the situation that defines how you handle it and where you go from here.
“It’s easy to be the victim. It’s easy to point the finger of blame. It’s easy to stay stuck and unhappy.
I don’t do easy.” Bruce Van Horn
I don’t either. I’ve been stuck before and refused to move and I have been totally unhappy but I don’t stay there for long. My mom once told me, “If you fall, dust off and get back on that horse.” It seemed silly at the time but that piece of advice has stood the test of time. Sometimes it takes a while before I get moving again and yes, at times I look for ways to deflect and to put the blame on someone else because that would be the easiest option to the problem at hand but it is also the way to not take responsibility for my part in the situation. Did I let it happen? Did I see it coming and chose not to do something about it? More importantly, how much blame do I give myself for what happened?
The thing is, situations happen, circumstances happen and life happens. Looking for easy options rather than looking for solutions is not going to get you out of where you’re at.
Remember:
“When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at himself.” Louis Nizer
Why do we blame others?
According to innerbalanceaz.com, it’s because”
It’s easy
It feeds a need for control
It fuels a desire for perfectionism
It keeps them from having to be vulnerable
It protects their ego
It unloads backed-up feelings
Furthermore, “it offers a quick escape from guilt and is effortless when feeling defensive.”
However, if you get good at the blame game, you become so adept at it that it may even feel good in the beginning but it is a losing game in the end. Blaming leads to more blaming, it leads you to feelings of helplessness, it stunts your personal growth because you’ll always be looking for the easy way out and you form unhealthy relationships because blaming triggers mistrust and judgment which in turn pushes people away.
Taking responsibility is hard and we don’t do ‘hard’ too well, do we? Guess what? Hard is needed to turn that ‘point finger’ inwards and to take some of the blame yourself. It is also needed to get you to where you want to go in life and easy is not going to cut it. The next time you take aim at someone to place the blame on them, look at yourself and then go from there.
“It’s easy to blame everyone and everything for our failures and lack of success isn’t it…that means we don’t have to do anything to change….
Blaming gets you off the hook…..but it will never get you the life you dream of.”
ONLY RESPONSIBILITY WILL DO THAT.
TAKE THAT RESPONSIBILITY.
Have an amazing day.
Site Title 