Tag: feelings

Good Vibes (Archives)

Photo by Mehmet DEMİR on Pexels.com

“One small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.”

Dictionary.com defines good vibes as a “slang phrase for the positive feelings given off by a person, place or situation.” When good vibes are present you feel positive emotions or rather you radiate trust, love and kindness to those around you.

“A kind word, a genuine smile, and a warm gesture can send the best vibes.” Unknown

I can agree with the genuine smile part. Sharing smiles is a part of my DNA and if we share eye-contact, a smile is the first thing you’ll see before we even exchange a word. There is nothing wrong with sharing a smile with strangers. Who knows you might have changed their day for the better and it didn’t cost you anything to do so.

However, today ‘good vibes’ was the furthest thing on my mind. Something didn’t go quite right yesterday and it triggered an emotional response which filled me with agitation and that is putting it mildly. Afterwards, I wanted to make it right but I had to give it time so I tossed and turned all night and woke up with a big chip on my shoulder and not quite ready to blow it off. I have to keep moving to stop the overthinking I told myself. I put on my old sweats, the rattiest I could find to exaggerate how I was feeling, bundled my hair on my head and looking like a nightmare, I decided to do a thorough cleaning of the bedroom especially when I could see the dust bunnies grinning at me daring me to touch them. I got all the necessary stuff ready and a big bowl of water to wipe everything clean. Good vibes at this point was nowhere to be seen! Cleaning was and is not my favorite chore but it was one way to drown out my mind so I got ready to tackle the impossible. Just as I was getting ready to start, Chachi the cat walks in, takes one look at the big bowl of water and looks at me as if to say, “What’s the pool doing in the middle of the room mom?” That was enough to light up my eyes, put a smile on my face and to bring the good vibes rushing back in. Just an example of how little it takes to change the mood in an instant if only you’re ready and willing to let it.

“Let it go. Change the channel. Turn it off. Unsubscribe. Unfriend. Unfollow. Mute. Block. Walk away. Breathe.” Unknown

The day took off on a better note afterwards and I had a clean bedroom to boot. The problem was still there but it didn’t need to fill my whole day and neither did it have the power to destroy my mood, my day and my good vibes. Here are some rules, there are seven of them to help you to get your energy back, to bring oomph back into your life and more than that to put that smile back on your face. It did on mine.

7 RULES of LIFE

Make peace with your past so it won’t disturb your future.

What other people think of you is none of your business.

The person in charge of your happiness is you.

Don’t compare your life to others. Comparison is the thief of joy.

Time heals almost everything. Give it time.

Stop thinking so much. It’s alright not to know all the answers.

SMILE. You don’t own all the problems in the world.

So for today, GOOD VIBES ONLY!

Have an amazing day.

Half-Hearted Connections (Archives)

Photo by Anas Hinde on Pexels.com

“You don’t deserve a half-hearted love. You don’t deserve someone who can only promise you pieces and not the whole. You don’t deserve someone who’s walking around investing time in other some ones. You don’t deserve a person who can’t commit.” Marisa Donnelly

Have you ever fallen for an emotionally-unavailable man? Have you ever wondered why you’re on a roller-coaster ride of ups and downs and you don’t know if you’re coming or going? If you’re caught up in a never-ending cycle of being taken for a ride, it’s time to get off.

An emotionally unavailable man is typically defined as, “not willing or able to truly commit to you and be loyal to you. This type of man will often want to keep things casual and undefined so as to not deal with any of the emotional components that go into a long-term relationship.”

The problem is even though these men are not available, it doesn’t stop them from being out there on the dating scene. They don’t want long-term but pretend that they do. They send out mixed signals and at times it seems like they want “forever” but it is more in their mind than anything else. The message they deliver is a confusing one and just when you think that you’ve found the one, they’ll show you different in a not so nice way. They’re there one minute, ghost you the next or worse still take up with someone else right before your very eyes. This is a relationship where you’re the non-entity and it is all about them.

How do you know if they’re emotionally unavailable? Here are some signs according to Victoria Miretti.

They cannot say they are looking for a long term committed relaitonship.

They don’t court you.

They struggle to have emotional or in depth conversations.

Their words and actions don’t match.

They are inconsistent.

You don’t experience a steady upward progression in the relationship.

I had the unfortunate experience of meeting one such person. He walked in like a hurricane ready to sweep everything away in his path and I was just coming out of a storm. He had all the makings of “the guy.” The relationship if you can call it that took off like a whirlwind but each time we got close, he took 10 steps back. I noticed the hesitation and put it down to fear because I was feeling the same thing. The problem was I was willing to settle for crumbs knowing full well that they were crumbs because I was coming from a place of lack myself. Having just lost a special someone, I was looking for a relationship. It was a perfect meeting of the minds. The only problem, it wasn’t enough and I knew what a good relationship should look like. This one was sorely lacking but I put up with the charade.

“Life is too short for half-hearted connections and meaningless run-throughs.” Unknown

Low-effort men do not invest in you because they can’t. They find it easy to walk away and take up with someone new in a matter of days or more specifically even before the relationship has ended because their emotions don’t run very deep and hurting someone is part and parcel of how they operate. It is a place where nothing affects them because their heart is under lock and key. A no man’s land or rather a no woman’s land as far as they are concerned. So why even be out there? I guess everyone needs love and if you hurt someone along the way what’s the big deal, right? The problem is, it is a big deal to the person who gets hurt in the process.

“Never put them first, if you always come last. Never give your all, if you only get half.” Unknown

If you’ve read my article, “Dating No-Gooders,” you’ll know that they are out there along with all the others that give “dating” a bad name. One false move will get you to where you don’t want to be. If you’re looking for Mr. Right, know that it is a dangerous world out there so step lightly. If he’s unavailable and shows the signs from the get go, leave him alone and move on. Some people cannot love you the way you want to be loved AND you’re too valuable to settle for anything less or for half-hearted connections.

How do you know if he’s emotionally available? According to singleover30.net, here are some signs to look out for.

If a man is present with you when he is with you, that’s a good sign.

This is not always true from my experience. The person I knew was all there when we spent time together and gave me the impression that he wasn’t shying away from anything but he was emotionally unavailable and hence the confusion.

He is comfortable talking about his feelings.

He is willing to talk about the progression of the relationship.

He won’t waste your time with half-hearted promises.

He will be interested in you and your life.

He prioritizes spending time with you.

Therapist: You saw the red flags though, right?

Me: I thought it was a carnival.

That says it all.

Have an amazing day.

Half-Hearted Connections

Photo by Anas Hinde on Pexels.com

“You don’t deserve a half-hearted love. You don’t deserve someone who can only promise you pieces and not the whole. You don’t deserve someone who’s walking around investing time in other some ones. You don’t deserve a person who can’t commit.” Marisa Donnelly

Have you ever fallen for an emotionally-unavailable man? Have you ever wondered why you’re on a roller-coaster ride of ups and downs and you don’t know if you’re coming or going? If you’re caught up in a never-ending cycle of being taken for a ride, it’s time to get off.

An emotionally unavailable man is typically defined as, “not willing or able to truly commit to you and be loyal to you. This type of man will often want to keep things casual and undefined so as to not deal with any of the emotional components that go into a long-term relationship.”

The problem is even though these men are not available, it doesn’t stop them from being out there on the dating scene. They don’t want long-term but pretend that they do. They send out mixed signals and at times it seems like they want “forever” but it is more in their mind than anything else. The message they deliver is a confusing one and just when you think that you’ve found the one, they’ll show you different in a not so nice way. They’re there one minute, ghost you the next or worse still take up with someone else right before your very eyes. This is a relationship where you’re the non-entity and it is all about them.

How do you know if they’re emotionally unavailable? Here are some signs according to Victoria Miretti.

They cannot say they are looking for a long term committed relaitonship.

They don’t court you.

They struggle to have emotional or in depth conversations.

Their words and actions don’t match.

They are inconsistent.

You don’t experience a steady upward progression in the relationship.

I had the unfortunate experience of meeting one such person. He walked in like a hurricane ready to sweep everything away in his path and I was just coming out of a storm. He had all the makings of “the guy.” The relationship if you can call it that took off like a whirlwind but each time we got close, he took 10 steps back. I noticed the hesitation and put it down to fear because I was feeling the same thing. The problem was I was willing to settle for crumbs knowing full well that they were crumbs because I was coming from a place of lack myself. Having just lost a special someone, I was looking for a relationship. It was a perfect meeting of the minds. The only problem, it wasn’t enough and I knew what a good relationship should look like. This one was sorely lacking but I put up with the charade.

“Life is too short for half-hearted connections and meaningless run-throughs.” Unknown

Low-effort men do not invest in you because they can’t. They find it easy to walk away and take up with someone new in a matter of days or more specifically even before the relationship has ended because their emotions don’t run very deep and hurting someone is part and parcel of how they operate. It is a place where nothing affects them because their heart is under lock and key. A no man’s land or rather a no woman’s land as far as they are concerned. So why even be out there? I guess everyone needs love and if you hurt someone along the way what’s the big deal, right? The problem is, it is a big deal to the person who gets hurt in the process.

“Never put them first, if you always come last. Never give your all, if you only get half.” Unknown

If you’ve read my article, “Dating No-Gooders,” you’ll know that they are out there along with all the others that give “dating” a bad name. One false move will get you to where you don’t want to be. If you’re looking for Mr. Right, know that it is a dangerous world out there so step lightly. If he’s unavailable and shows the signs from the get go, leave him alone and move on. Some people cannot love you the way you want to be loved AND you’re too valuable to settle for anything less or for half-hearted connections.

How do you know if he’s emotionally available? According to singleover30.net, here are some signs to look out for.

If a man is present with you when he is with you, that’s a good sign.

This is not always true from my experience. The person I knew was all there when we spent time together and gave me the impression that he wasn’t shying away from anything but he was emotionally unavailable and hence the confusion.

He is comfortable talking about his feelings.

He is willing to talk about the progression of the relationship.

He won’t waste your time with half-hearted promises.

He will be interested in you and your life.

He prioritizes spending time with you.

Therapist: You saw the red flags though, right?

Me: I thought it was a carnival.

That says it all.

Have an amazing day.

Good Vibes

Photo by Mehmet DEMİR on Pexels.com

“One small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.”

Dictionary.com defines good vibes as a “slang phrase for the positive feelings given off by a person, place or situation.” When good vibes are present you feel positive emotions or rather you radiate trust, love and kindness to those around you.

“A kind word, a genuine smile, and a warm gesture can send the best vibes.” Unknown

I can agree with the genuine smile part. Sharing smiles is a part of my DNA and if we share eye-contact, a smile is the first thing you’ll see before we even exchange a word. There is nothing wrong with sharing a smile with strangers. Who knows you might have changed their day for the better and it didn’t cost anything to do so.

However, today ‘good vibes’ was the furthest thing on my mind. Something didn’t go quite right yesterday and it triggered an emotional response which filled me with agitation and that is putting it mildly. Afterwards, I wanted to make it right but I had to give it time so I tossed and turned all night and woke up with a big chip on my shoulder and not quite ready to blow it off. I have to keep moving to stop the overthinking I told myself. I put on my old sweats, the rattiest I could find to exaggerate how I was feeling, bundled my hair on my head and looking like a nightmare, I decided to do a thorough cleaning of the bedroom especially when I could see the dust bunnies grinning at me daring me to touch them. I got all the necessary stuff ready and a big bowl of water to wipe everything clean. Good vibes at this point was nowhere to be seen! Cleaning was and is not my favorite chore but it was one way to drown out my mind so I got ready to tackle the impossible. Just as I was getting ready to start, Chachi the cat walks in, takes one look at the big bowl of water and looks at me as if to say, “What’s the pool doing in the middle of the room mom?” That was enough to light up my eyes, put a smile on my face and to bring the good vibes rushing back in. Just an example of how little it takes to change the mood in an instant if only you’re ready and willing to let it.

“Let it go. Change the channel. Turn it off. Unsubscribe. Unfriend. Unfollow. Mute. Block. Walk away. Breathe.” Unknown

The day took off on a better note afterwards and I had a clean bedroom to boot. The problem was still there but it didn’t need to fill my whole day and neither did it have the power to destroy my mood, my day and my good vibes. Here are some rules, there are seven of them to help you to get your energy back, to bring oomph back into your life and more than that to put that smile back on your face. It did on mine.

7 RULES of LIFE

Make peace with your past so it won’t disturb your future.

What other people think of you is none of your business.

The person in charge of your happiness is you.

Don’t compare your life to others. Comparison is the thief of joy.

Time heals almost everything. Give it time.

Stop thinking so much. It’s alright not to know all the answers.

SMILE. You don’t own all the problems in the world.

So for today, GOOD VIBES ONLY!

Have an amazing day.