I remember her well. She was young and beautiful but more than that she had a great smile and a quiet way about her. I loved being in her class and somehow I had caught her attention. She would give me an encouraging nod and sometimes outright praise. This stoked my young ego and got me interested in English and in writing in particular. I made it my mission to excel in it!
I was in elementary school and the homework was to write a story, a fictional one. Mine was about a lion, that’s all I can remember but she held it up to the class and said, “This is a beautiful story.” It was the start of my writing career. The lady had no idea that she had set a fire ablaze. Then one day she said, “Tia, come on up and show them how it’s done.” Believe me I was oozing with pride as I walked to the front of the classroom and started writing on the board. Afterwards, she patted me on the head and said, “Well done!” My passion for writing had an outlet and I was on my way.
The English teacher didn’t know it at the time but her kind words, her motivation and her ability to bring forth the talent within me had set the wheels in motion. I became a whizz at writing. My first story made front cover and I was 16 at the time and since then I have written and published thousands of articles. I got my start in a classroom a long time ago from a person who nudged me gently in that direction and nurturing that potential she give me the tools to move ahead. Sometimes it takes just one person to see potential and to light that flame and she did.
Her impact on my writing career was tremendous so thank you.
If someone can’t make the effort to be in your life – they don’t deserve to be there.
It only ends once, everything else is just progress.
A good cup of tea can solve just about anything.
Stick to your guns.
Impromptu solo dance parties are good for your health.
Spend time with the people who matter the most.” Unknown
I remember a time when life was simple. Having my head in the clouds and my feet on the ground was a daily and joyous norm for me. Twirling on my toes, watching clouds go by on my back and chasing rainbows and dreams was what life was about way back when I was young and life was simple.
Splashing in duck puddles on a rainy day with only the ducks for company was absolute heaven. Covered in mud from head to toe and looking like a gypsy was a badge I wore with pride. Talking to unseen beings who only existed in my mind didn’t matter because it made life simple.
Chasing rainbow colored fish in a dirty stream made it the absolute highlight of my day and when I had a few wriggling in my hands with the sunlight reflecting off their multi-hued bodies made it even more so. Boys….hmm….boys were of no importance except as buddies. They did not have the power to touch my heart but that was way back when things were simple and I had wings.
Dancing in the rain, jumping over puddles of water and squealing with laughter meant I was one with nature. Anger, hurt and pain were unknown in a life where nothing mattered except for the magic I created within myself. Joy was an everyday occurrence but it became a thing of the past. It was way back when things were simple. I am a grown-up now.
Adulthood is defined as or means that, “they are an adult or that they behave in a responsible way.”
Someone asked me not too long ago why I couldn’t behave the same way. The answer is simple. Grown-ups or adults behave in a specific way. Propriety demands that I “conform to what is socially acceptable in conduct or speech.”
Going back to the quote I started out with, I will choose a few I can live with.
“Sometimes being a bitch is necessary.” This is an alien concept to me as being a “bitch” is way beyond my grasp of being a good person. Lately, I am learning that it is a necessary step to where I want to get to in my journey of life. A bitch is applied to a woman and defined as “someone, who is belligerent, unreasonable, malicious, controlling, aggressive or dominant.” Perhaps I need to apply this concept on my way to arriving at my end goal. Life is not that simple anymore.
“If someone can’t make the effort to be in your life – they don’t deserve to be there.” This is a hard one. Where once “men” were of no consequence, growing up means learning to deal with this species. If you thought women were difficult to comprehend, try dealing with this group! The end point is, if they can’t be bothered to be in your life and every effort is just lukewarm or worse cold then it is time to put your “bitch” shoes on and move on. Life is too short and neither is it just in black and white. It is complicated enough as it is and perhaps we make it more complicated. It boils down to, if you can’t make an effort, it is time for you to go.
Last but not least, “Spend time with people who matter most.” These are people who show up when times are tough. The ones who are not just “fair weather friends” but who are there without being asked. Get rid of the liars, the ones who have lying built into their DNA, this is a necessary step in making your life simple again. Liars are not worthy of your time and space because they say one thing and behave as if you don’t matter. Walk and don’t look back!
“The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.” Hans Hofmann
Looks easy enough doesn’t it but believe me it is not. You can get back to the basics. You can still dance in the rain, imagine yourself splashing in puddles and envision yourself in a much simpler time and place. Truth is it takes imagination, hard work, determination and courage to get back to that place of simplicity. Complicated is just in your mind.
I would say the same things I mentioned in yesterday’s “Daily Prompt,” plus I’ll add a few more. Besides walking, working out and meditation, I put my feelings down on paper or write articles on how I am feeling and what I have done or am doing to combat those feelings.
Writing is a tremendous tool, if you can call it that, to bring out what I am holding inside into the open so that it no longer weighs me down. Getting it out there has also helped me to get a better focus on the problem and to come up with better ways of handling whatever is bothering me. Somehow seeing it for what it is, just a ripple even if at times it seems like a big rock, helps me to deal with the situation in a more focused way. Writing is often my go to method for solving negative feelings and it has been working so far.
The other method I turn to is breathing. Whenever I feel like I am drowning in negativity, it happens from time to time but when I sit myself down and go within and start one of my breathing techniques, it melts away. This doesn’t always work but more often than not. There’s something about taking a deep breath, holding it in for a few seconds and slowly letting go with a sigh that releases the anxiety and nervousness within. It is a stress buster and just a few minutes a day does wonders for my inner being, my psyche and for letting negative feelings go where they belong, wherever that is. Peace is what I seek and it is what I find when I do “deep breathing” several times a day.
Daily writing prompt
What strategies do you use to cope with negative feelings?
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” Leo Buscaglia
Kindness or being kind is no longer as important as it used to be. We live in a self-obsessed world and when once we used to have close interactions with people, it is now being replaced with chats, text messages or quick hellos and goodbyes. The emoji is front and center when it comes to showing you care and there is one for every emotion you can think of including sadness. We’ve become so impersonal that closeness is a thing of the past and showing emotions much less so. We live in a fast paced world where technology is king and people a commodity like anything else.
Yet, we haven’t changed much or have we? I think we have. People have become much more self-centered and ‘me’ first is often the case. If you hurt someone these days you send an emoji to say you’re sorry. It could be in the form of a one tear- drop emoji or just a kiss emoji and you’ve done your ‘compassion’ and ‘kindness’ part. However, this makes it hard to have a human connection when you come across as a robot. The more we rely on technology to do the human stuff, the less your heart interacts and hardens to a point. Kindness is a very human trait and it can’t be replaced by emojis no matter how cute they are. It is just a stop-gap measure. The warmth of kindness comes from within, deep within your soul and emojis and other futuristic entities masquerading as the real thing can never take the place of human emotions no matter how advanced technology gets and that’s the truth.
Case in point: I was sad the other day and I shared that with a friend. Immediately he sent a kiss emoji and the word ‘sorry.’ That was it, he had done his job on being human or so he thought but I was left feeling like it could have been a little more, how about the human touch, it was sorely missing. A conversation would have been nice or even checking to see if I was ok from time to time but looking at it from his standpoint he had shown his compassion with an emoji and besides anything else would have taken too much time from his day and he had more important things to do.
Helping each other is fast becoming a thing of the past and so are other forms of kindness. We are a ‘me’ society first and foremost and everything else takes a back seat AND we have an app for everything so why even bother with being nice? Do we have an app for kindness as well? I’ll have to check on that because I’ve been showing kindness the old-fashioned way. Smiles, warm hugs, eye contact and a helping hand are still my go-to for kindness and it works just fine from the human angle.
“Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.” Unknown
How about sharing a smile? It is known as the universal language of kindness after all. When was the last time you smiled at someone? When did you even look up from your phone, tablet or computer to really look at the world around you? It’s becoming a lost art, this human interaction thing and it’s scary.
“It only takes a split second to smile and forget, yet to someone that needed it, it can last a lifetime.” Steve Maraboli
Here’s a call to bringing kindness back. I’m not talking about the “I care but only for a split second,” or “I see your tears but I can’t give you a hug because I’m too busy,” variety. I’m talking about reaching out and showing you really do care. It is going to take a little bit of your time, effort and patience but the rewards are plentiful. That human touch needs to be put front and center again and let’s just use those cute little emojis ONLY when we have no other choice. Start with a warm smile and the rest takes care of itself.
“Sometimes it takes only one act of kindness and caring to change a person’s life.” Jackie Chan
I think it would be my computer, my mobile phone and lastly but not least my car.
The computer is the first thing I go to after having my first cup of coffee and breakfast. I wonder what is waiting for me there. Perhaps a message from the publisher that the final manuscript is waiting for my approval but so far no luck there! Otherwise, I look at what the Daily Prompt is about and go from there. It is a companion of sorts although inanimate but still it is something I can’t live without. What if it breaks down? Lord, have mercy! I think I would be lost without it.
The mobile phone is my security blanket. It is there as a back up if the land line doesn’t work or for some reason is down which has happened many times before. It is next to me when I go to sleep and one I reach for in the middle of the night when sleep evades me. There is information at my finger tips and help if needed when I am out and about. Nope, I can’t live without it either.
My car is my mode of transportation to get me from Point A to Point B. I don’t think about how much I need it until it breaks down which it did a month or two ago and then it hit home that I had been taking it for granted. It was time to change that mindset! It is back and running and purring like a new born.
Three inanimate objects but I can’t see my life without them and they are needed for my daily existence. Perhaps I place too much importance on them but that’s the way it is and so it will stay.
This one is difficult too. There are so many phases and each one has taught me a different lesson about life. Whether I wanted to learn, accept and move on is a whole different story altogether! Most times it was met with digging in the heels and howling to the moon which is my usual response when something changes.
If I had to pick one, I would say it was leaving my childhood behind. I was a young girl who ran wild in the woods behind my home. It was a magical time and nothing can compare to that time of innocence where the world was at my feet to explore and to create. Yes, create. I came up with a world of my own, a safe world and a world filled with imagination and creativity. I talked to the birds, plunged in duck puddles, looked under huge mushrooms for “little people” and out of that world emerged my love for imagination and my penchant for writing. I was one with nature and it was a gorgeous place to be in.
It all changed when I got what all girls get. I thought I was dying at first but in actuality it was another kind of death. I had to grow up and leave that world of innocence behind because as mom put it, life demanded it of me. No more running around, no more traipsing around in the woods and no more jumping in anything I could find! Time to grow up and be a young lady. They (the parents) had to drag me to the water to make me drink it but as with all things where life is concerned, you have to bite the bullet and no matter how much it hurts, just DO IT! I did.
I am prim and proper now but some days when I am all alone and no one is watching, I want to go back there where my imagination was given free reign and the world came alive in colors, beautiful colors of the rainbow and more! It was a pristine world that lives within me no matter how old I get and I am thankful for all that it gave me. I don’t think I have ever really said goodbye to it, it’s there deep within me and when I need to I pull it out and see myself walking through that deep dark forest again where anything was possible and there was magic in its midst!
Daily writing prompt
Describe a phase in life that was difficult to say goodbye to.
I want to say keeping my sanity intact! Just kidding or maybe NOT. Let’s see this question requires thinking ahead and not a day ahead but six months in the future and that is a challenge in itself!
This year is going to be a challenge because I have certain goals I want to achieve. I’m a stickler for the rules and even though they are rules of my own making I try to keep to them even if it means drowning in the process! Just kidding.
One challenge is to keep away from MEN! We’re into month two and I’m doing fine with this challenge. I need to find out what I want out of life, who I want to be with and change certain mindsets about me which will stop me from going down the same paths over and over again. I did that last year and it didn’t work out well so this year the challenge is to go it alone until I am good and ready to put myself out there again. It may never happen and that is a challenge right there but who knows, I don’t need to rush into relationships simply because someone says so or rush into something I am not ready for.
I realize that when you close the door and go within, when you are not looking that’s when the menfolk come out in droves! It’s as if they view you as a challenge, one that needs to be broken. Go figure! I say good luck because I’m not just a stickler for rules but I’ve got willpower oozing out my pores even if it smells like cheesecake sometimes referring to my cheesecake fetish of course!
That’s my six months challenge in a nutshell.
Daily writing prompt
What is the biggest challenge you will face in the next six months?
Love is elusive, it has been said. It is hard to pin down said another. Sometimes it hides in plain sight but it is the one thing that we can’t live without says the heart. Sure, we can pretend that it doesn’t matter if we have love or not and convince ourselves that it is absolutely alright but in those moments when all is quiet and you’re left looking up at the night sky all lit up with a million stars, that is when your heart reminds you that there is more to life than standing here all alone surrounded by such beauty. It is at those moments that your heart yearns for something more, someone to hold, someone to share hugs and kisses with and that one special someone who will finally complete you.
“It’s impossible,” said pride.
“It’s risky,” said experience.
“It’s pointless,” said reason.
“Give it a try,” whispered the heart. Unknown.
Giving it a try is easy. Taking the risk, we’ve all tried that. Impossible and pointless? I don’t know about that but I’m on the search for love, true love. Not the “whishy washy” variety that disguises itself as love but in reality is far from it. This kind of love has the potential to break your heart in two or more pieces if given the chance but I’m looking for the type that can weather any storm. However, I have the tendency to jump in with both feet where love is concerned but I am learning as I go along. The solution could be that we need to stop doing this below.
“Stop planting flowers in peoples yards who aren’t going to water them.” Hylyrikz.com
How many times have we done that? Plenty of times? I know I’ve done that many times over knowing full well that I was stepping on dangerous ground. Yet, I kept on doing it saying, “It has potential, it could be what I’ve been looking for.” And what is that?” you might ask. Is it someone who treats you like you are ordinary? You deserve much more and I deserve much more than that. Ordinary is not my thing, has never been and will never be my thing. If someone you love treats you as “ordinary” it is time to move on and look for that someone who shows you that you are “extraordinary.”
“If he misses you, he’ll call.
If he wants you, he’ll say it.
If he cares, he’ll show it.
And if not, he can’t be worth your time.” Unknown.
This quote says it all. The journey to finding love is hard enough but if you have someone who doesn’t show you all of the above, it is time to move on. Love is not about you chasing someone with no reciprocation in return. It is the meeting of minds and of hearts but it is so much more than that. The caring will show if the love is there. Pay attention to what is shown because it will show you the reality of the situation. Which brings me to the last part.
“Never apologize for trusting your intuition – your brain can play tricks, your heart can blind, but your gut is always right.” Rachel Wolchin
Listen to your gut, we’ve heard that often enough right? How often have we turned our backs on it? I know I have more times than I can count on the fingers of one hand. It was my way of turning a blind eye when the truth was staring me in the face. I’ve walked down paths I should not have and at times the pain was unbearable but I had only myself to blame. Pay attention to that gut feeling, it only has your best interest at heart.
The path I am on is scary, the unknown always is but armed with what I have learned from 2024, I am confident that I am headed in the right direction. I just need to keep putting one foot in front of the other, take a couple of deep breaths and keep on moving. If I stumble along the way and fall which I know I will, it is alright. I will gather up yet another lesson learned and keep moving to the finish line. The end goal is finding love, the kind that will last a lifetime not just for the here and now. When I do find that elusive someone it will not be about completing me but more about adding to who I am and making me feel absolutely extraordinary!
If someone can’t make the effort to be in your life – they don’t deserve to be there.
It only ends once, everything else is just progress.
A good cup of tea can solve just about anything.
Stick to your guns.
Impromptu solo dance parties are good for your health.
Spend time with the people who matter the most.
I remember a time when life was simple. Having my head in the clouds and my feet on the ground was a daily and joyous norm for me. Twirling on my toes, watching clouds go by on my back and chasing rainbows and dreams was what life was about way back when I was young and life was simple.
Splashing in duck puddles on a rainy day with only the ducks for company was absolute heaven. Covered in mud from head to toe and looking like a gypsy was a badge I wore with pride. Talking to unseen beings who only existed in my mind didn’t matter because it made life simple.
Chasing rainbow colored fish in a dirty stream made it the absolute highlight of my day and when I had a few wriggling in my hands with the sunlight reflecting off their multi-hued bodies made it even more so. Boys….hmm….boys were of no importance except as buddies. They did not have the power to touch my heart but that was way back when things were simple and I had wings.
Dancing in the rain, jumping over puddles of water and squealing with laughter meant I was one with nature. Anger, hurt and pain were unknown in a life where nothing mattered except for the magic I created within myself. Joy was an everyday occurrence but it became a thing of the past. It was way back when things were simple. I am a grown-up now.
Adulthood is defined as or means that, “they are an adult or that they behave in a responsible way.”
Someone asked me not too long ago why I couldn’t behave the same way. The answer is simple. Grown-ups or adults behave in a specific way. Propriety demands that I “conform to what is socially acceptable in conduct or speech.”
Going back to the quote I started out with, I will choose a few I can live with.
“Sometimes being a bitch is necessary.” This is an alien concept to me as being a “bitch” is way beyond my grasp of being a good person. Lately, I am learning that it is a necessary step to where I want to get to in my journey of life. A bitch is applied to a woman and defined as “someone, who is belligerent, unreasonable, malicious, controlling, aggressive or dominant.” Perhaps I need to apply this concept on my way to arriving at my end goal. Life is not that simple anymore.
“If someone can’t make the effort to be in your life – they don’t deserve to be there.” This is a hard one. Where once “men” were of no consequence, growing up means learning to deal with this species. If you thought women were difficult to comprehend, try dealing with this group! The end point is, if they can’t be bothered to be in your life and every effort is just lukewarm or worse cold then it is time to put your “bitch” shoes on and move on. Life is too short and neither is it just in black and white. It is complicated enough as it is and perhaps we make it more complicated. It boils down to, if you can’t make an effort, it is time for you to go.
Last but not least, “Spend time with people who matter most.” These are people who show up when times are tough. The ones who are not just “fair weather friends” but who are there without being asked. Get rid of the liars, the ones who have lying built into their DNA, this is a necessary step in making your life simple again. Liars are not worthy of your time and space because they say one thing and behave as if you don’t matter. Walk and don’t look back!
“The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.” Hans Hofmann
Looks easy enough doesn’t it but believe me it is not. You can get back to the basics. You can still dance in the rain, imagine yourself splashing in puddles and envision yourself in a much simpler time and place. Truth is it takes imagination, hard work, determination and courage to get back to that place of simplicity. Complicated is just in your mind.
The Duchess of Sussex shared this quote in an interview and how right she is.
How many times have we questioned if we are really enough? How many times have we said if only I was thinner, prettier, more popular, had more friends than life would be better, simpler and I would be enough. More times than you can count on your fingers right? I know I have.
I think to be enough you have to start by loving yourself first. It is not about what society expects of you, the impossible goals it puts out there so that achieving some of them takes us to never never land and leaves us wanting but never quite attaining what is the norm or considered the norm in today’s society of much ado about nothing.
Beyonce said:
“Your self-worth is determined by you. You don’t have to depend on someone telling you who you are.”
I will add, love yourself first and you’re halfway there. Look in the mirror and give yourself a big hug and say, “I love you warts and all!” Yes warts because we do carry those unseen warts around with us. Just the other day someone said to me, “You are your worst critic.” He is right but more appropriately I am my own worst enemy. When I look in that mirror first thing in the morning, I see all that is wrong and those warts, those invisible ones take shape and have the power to obliterate if I allow them. These days, I see someone genuine with potential staring back at me. I smile, give myself a hug and go on my way.
So many of us go through life carrying the burden of I don’t measure up. It is easy to do in this world of ours where perfection and beauty are key buzzwords and measuring up is an uphill task. However, these are just two words. Honesty, integrity, dependability, good-heartedness, helpfulness and so on are all words that carry so much worth that they have the power to blow those two other words, beauty and perfection to kingdom come! Look at you, the real you and you will know that you my friend are enough as you are.
Someone close to me said, “I don’t know if I can make it.” Despair, frustration and a fear of the future are the monsters he will have to slay. He’s at a standstill but this is nothing new. I’ve been there and so have you when the day seems unfathomable and all you want to do is turn out the light, shut out the world and go within yourself and stay there for awhile.
“Today I feel like putting on the “OUT OF ORDER” sticker on my head and going back to bed.” Unknown
However, the trick is in knowing when to crawl out of bed, remove that sign and take life by its reins and to say, “I am enough as I am. You won’t defeat me!”
You are capable, you have the power within you to achieve the impossible and you my friend are stronger than you think!
YOU ARE ENOUGH!
“My mission should I choose to accept it, is to find peace with exactly who and what I am. To take pride in my thoughts, my appearance, my talents, my flaws and to stop this incessant worrying that I can’t be loved as I am.” Anais Nin
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