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Trends

Trends come and they go. They come to stay for a while and leave just as quickly. It takes the fashion world by storm for that moment in time and it is all the rage. Everyone wants to duplicate, imitate, and let it all out as far as that trend is concerned but it is not a permanent fixture. Just a passing phase.

As a former fashion editor, I’ve kept up with them, worn them, and written about them. Fashion has evolved with the times and it went from opulent wear that were restrictive to say the least to more functional streetwear. The 1920s brought about a revolutionary style of dressing. Gone were the tight-fitting corsets and these were replaced by drop-waist dresses that moved freely and gave women a sense of freedom.

Remember the bell-bottoms? This was the trend in the 1970s. The wider the bottoms, the better! I’m talking about the pants of course. Bohemian was in and casual ease was the trend.

1980s brought power dressing to the forefront. Oversized blazers, bold jewelry and PADDED shoulders took dressing to a new level. Add big pieces of jewelry to that and you were on your way to success.

Then Grunge came in and held court for a while. It was based on minimalism. Low-rise denim and velour tracksuits were in. Combat boots and slip dresses were in too. Comfort was in and who cared about dressing to the nines?!!

Today, we have a mishmash of all those styles. Anything goes and if you borrow from all those styles, you are considered fashionable and ready to step out and be seen. Today’s trend is based on blending comfort with high fashion. Yoga pants, sweatpants, big comfy tops, are the norm for daily wear as it is with me and I dress it up a LITTLE for the evening with a nice shirt, a good pair of jeans and comfortable shoes and I’m ready to be out there looking smart and fashionable.

Coming back to your question. If I could erase one trend from history, it would be those bell-bottoms. I think they looked ridiculous back then and still do today! That’s just my opinion. However, they are making a strong comeback. Celebrities love them and so do the normal folk. Updated to look better than they did back then, today’s trend has high fitted waists and flare gently past the knees. It doesn’t look that bad depending on who wears them but I’m hoping it leaves quickly and goes to never never land!

Daily writing prompt

If you could erase one trend from history, what would it be?

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Switzerland

A long time ago when I was doing my armchair traveling, I came across pictures of this faraway land and it kept me captive. I told myself that one day I will visit this gorgeous place and even live there.

Life had other plans! I would travel the world experiencing life in some strange and wonderful places but I never made it to Switzerland! I lived in Asia and then I met my German ex and life got turned on its head. We fell in love, got married, and I got pregnant. He wanted to move back home, to a tiny little village that time forgot. Sometimes you can hear a pin drop.

I’ve raised my son here, learned to speak the language fluently, got divorced, and am learning to live here on my own. I think I wouldn’t change it for anything in the world. It’s not perfect but it is perfect enough for me. If you’re a writer, this is a dream place. It is quiet so that you can hear yourself think. The fields are gorgeous and some days you may think that no one else exists! There is very little to do here but that’s okay for a recluse like me. I love the peace and quiet. The people take some getting used to, they are set in their ways and they are way too conservative. However, when you get to know them and they invite you into their circle, that’s right “invite” you in, you’ve made it and you are treated like one of them. It is how I feel now.

I’ve been to many places in the world but if I could live anywhere in the world, I would pick this one. Why? It feels like home and there is this certain something about this place. Perhaps, it is the mixture of old and new or the smiles and waves that tell me I am welcomed here, but most of all I like the feel of safety that this place gives me. It is almost crime-free and you CAN leave your doors open at night but that’s where I draw the line!

I’m not there yet and I don’t think I ever will be. I have a German friend who leaves all the windows and doors open throughout the day and through the night! He says, “there is nothing to worry about!” Hmm…from his mouth to God’s ears!

I’m in a perfect place, one that works for me and that right there is the important part.

Daily writing prompt

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?

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A Quote I Live By?

Many of you know I love quotes. I find them inspiring and it is a quick pick-me-up when days are not looking like I want it to look like. Just a quote or two and it does the trick of getting me back to where I need to be. Just words you might say. True, but inspiring ones nonetheless.

One quote I live by and have lived by for a long time is this. “Live and Let Live.” Such simple words but it is needed in this world of ours where ugliness and cruelty rules and being different is considered a cardinal sin. This indirect quote “emphasizes coexistence and respect for all life forms.” If you look further, it means let someone live their life as he or she chooses and accept it for what it is. This acceptance bit is hard to come by in some circles.

Racism thrives on viewing individuals as being different because of skin color religious beliefs and or behavioral traits. Anything different in this circle is a no go or looked upon with disdain. I consider racism and racist attitudes the bane of our society. Someone said to me recently, “It will never change, racism will always exist. There is nothing you and I can do about it.” I beg to differ. Our world can be so much better if we can embrace each person for who they are and not for their outward appearance, who they marry and who they choose to be with and their worship practices. It shouldn’t matter but unfortunately it does. Just look at what Trump is unleashing in America and the world. Being “brown” could bring you a death sentence in a concentration camp somewhere far away.

LIVE AND LET LIVE for a better world, for acceptance of all people and for world peace as well. Here’s the thing it starts with you. One small step at a time as I always say. Teach your children the same. It starts at home and it is doable.

Daily writing prompt

Do you have a quote you live your life by or think of often?

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My Belief in Fate/Destiny

I do believe that fate/destiny are intertwined and things or events in life that take place do so because of these two entities if you can call them that. There is a higher force at work here and perhaps everything has already been put in motion according to how it should unfold and your life is not really your own. You are going along with the flow so to speak.

Fate is defined as “a power or agency determining events and destinies, acting beyond our control” and “destiny is responsible for everything. This destiny is predetermined and unchangeable.” If that is the case, it is frightening to say the least. It raises the question what if everything has already been preordained and nothing you do is going to change the outcome of what your destiny is going to be?

One particular event comes to mind. I met my ex at a university dance but I do believe that “fate” had arranged that meeting. After a painful breakup, I had taken a year off to recuperate and dating was on the backburner until that fateful evening. I was persuaded by some well-meaning friends to show up at the dance and I remember digging in my heels and saying no but I did go and there he was this tall, skinny and nerdy-looking individual who was not my type at first glance. Fate had other plans and destiny started the ball rolling that night and we ended up together. Even though we didn’t stay together, I feel the meeting was arranged by a higher force and destiny did the rest to put the chain of events in motion. Why did it happen if “forever” was not in the cards? Who knows, maybe it was some cruel trick played by fate/destiny and there was a lesson to be learned.

I’ll never know but I do believe that fate/destiny do exist and sometimes it works in your favor and sometimes it doesn’t. Yours is not to know the reason why!

Daily writing prompt

Do you believe in fate/destiny?

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Christmas Adieu! (Archives)

This post was from last year but I wasn’t alone this year either. My son decided to visit and it was nice. We had an alone mom and son time. Food was great, at least he thought so and he got all his favorites at one go! Well, two of his favorites, just the tuna stuff he loves and lasagne with a salad to tone down the high-carb intake. Anyway, Christmas is over and time to bid it Adieu again!

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It has come and gone. The time of year where some wait religiously to put on their best light show and see who can outdo whom! The festival of lights in the Christian sense is now more about presents, presents, and more presents. Add the food fest and raucous family gatherings and you have the Christmas of today.

Never mind about that. It has come and gone and for some, it was a dreadful time especially if you are faraway from family and loved ones and had to spend it alone. It brings home “loneliness” and being “lonely” to another level. I hope you survived it as I did.

I was going to spend it alone and was prepared to do so with no problems at all. However, a friend was going to be alone as well as he had decided not to spend it with his son and family. Misery loves company as they say. He came over armed with roses and presents and even a present for Chachi, the cat!. How thoughtful but Chachi wasn’t buying any of it! He kept his distance and his mistrust showed in those big eyes and sweet face of his.

“Hey buddy, don’t try anything with my mommy!” was the message he gave and it came across loud and clear.

Dinner was nice. It was a low-key affair although he came dressed to please and I stayed in my sweats! I did deliver a good one. The menu consisted of wild boar in chestnut sauce, red cabbage and dumplings. Dessert was cookies and cake. You guessed it. It was cheesecake! We called it a night at 8 p.m. and Chachi, the cat, became the “main man” again. Exactly how he likes it.

If you’re wondering if he’s the one, it’s a definite no. He’s nice enough but there’s something missing and something else keeps telling me NO! It must be my usual, “No one is good enough,” stance or my intuition is working overtime to guide me in the right direction. Let’s hope it’s the intuition part.

Christmas Day found me in my pjs all day and breathing a sigh of relief that I didn’t have to bother with cooking and putting on a spread. It was leftovers and that was perfectly fine. I watched stand-up comedy which kept me laughing and I had Chachi, the cat, cuddled up next to me. It was a nice Christmas but I’m glad it has come and gone. Next up is New Year’s Eve but I’m opting for the quiet variety as well. A recluse? Seems that way doesn’t it? I’m loving it and that’s all that matters.

Have an amazing day.

The Storytellers (Archives)

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“We are all unreliable narrators, not just in the way we tell our stories to others, but how we tell them to ourselves.” Deb Caletti

We love telling stories don’t we? I think our whole existence is based on telling stories. We add and subtract as we see fit and sometimes or rather more often than not we blow it out of proportion to fit the narrative. The narrative that we see as our reality.

“The stories we tell ourselves shape our lives. They shape who we believe we are, and this belief translates into who we become.” John Assaraf

Something happens and off we go overthinking and putting a story together in our minds. “I’m not good enough,” comes to mind if there has been a rejection of some kind or if something doesn’t go exactly like we want. It could also be someone we like but who turned us down but the reality is that this person is not what we need and is not good for us but we drum up this story about how great he/she is and before you know it, we’ve got the dream person staring back at us but in reality they are far from it. We cling to the stories we tell ourselves but it doesn’t stop there. It morphs and changes shape until that “not being good enough” transforms into something we don’t recognize anymore. If that isn’t bad enough, we look for different angles to make it as bad as possible until there’s no climbing out of the hole YOU dug for yourself. Now, you’re facing a huge problem but one of your own making.

Yes folks, some of us are great storytellers and let’s add doomsday soothsayers to that and you’ve got the picture. The problem is we “buy” the stories we tell and we do put some doozies out there that could earn us the Nobel Prize if there is one for such storytelling!

“The stories we tell ourselves shape our reality. If you want to change your life, change the narrative you’ve believed up to this point.” Unknown

Tell yourself YOU are good enough. YOU can change the narrative. YOU can tell better stories than of the doomsday variety. YOU are capable and YOU can take whatever life throws at you and come out the winner. YOU, my friend, have it in you to come out with the best story possible. Make it your very best but you’ve got to change the narrative. Take “I can’t” and “It’s not possible” to “I can” and “I’m going to do it!” I keep telling myself that as well.

“The only thing keeping you from what you want is the story you keep telling yourself about why you don’t have it.” Tony Robbins

Let’s stop embellishing and making up stories, ones that if given the chance will bring us down and keep us there. Let’s change them to the positive variety, the kind that will get us on the way and into something better. Reality is sometimes just that, you take what is handed to you and work to make it your best reality without all the extra frills. You know what I mean.

LET’S DO THIS! Let’s change the stories we tell ourselves from that of the downtrodden to flying high! WE CAN DO THIS!

Have an amazing day.

My Favorite Brands?

I’m no longer into brands as I used to be. I used to be a Fashion Editor and back then I knew every brand inside and out. These days I go for the simple stuff but two brands that I really love and still stick to are Zara and Massimo Dutti.

Zara, I love for their wearable styles and it fits my lifestyle now. Nothing too fancy but it is stylish and wearable. The lines are simple and clean. Just a pair of Zara pants paired with a cardigan or jacket and a blouse from the same collection is a put-together look that will take you from doing your daily chores such as shopping for your daily essentials to a much fancier meeting later in the day. Add a few pieces of jewelry and you’re set to conquer the day or rather the evening! The style factor is timeless but still trendy and I have many pieces from Zara in my wardrobe.

Massimo Dutti, what can I say? It used to be my go-to for a tailored look. Fashion lovers love this brand for its “quiet luxury aesthetic” but these days it is still an expensive brand and although better quality than Zara, it is mass-produced and considered a “fast-fashion” brand. However, it is of good quality and a few pieces in your wardrobe helps to bolster the look of understated elegance. A white Massimo Dutti blouse paired with a pair of blue jeans and a jacket says classy but still fashionable.

Not that anyone cares over here! This little village moves to a different drumbeat when it comes to fashion and dressing. Most of the women here don’t give a hoot about what you wear. So dressing up or brand names don’t matter much here. People or rather women wear the same stuff day in and day out and it is ok for working in their gardens or for doing their chores. I haven’t given up yet! I still do dress up presentably when I leave the house but indoors is another story altogether! PJs are my pick!

Daily writing prompt

What brands do you associate with?

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Blogging

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When I first started posting here, I didn’t think of it as blogging. I was away from the public eye or so I thought and at the time I had next to no viewers, readers or “likes” for that matter. It was alright with me because everything was low-key and I could write about whatever I wanted to.

It was fun, it was a way to get my frustrations out and at times my anger out as well and a way to clear the path forward. I had taken a fall and I was trying to find my way out of that rabbit hole and what better way to do this than to get it all out there, the good, the bad, and the ugly! I was literally putting myself out there, lock, stock and barrel.

Then those “likes” started rolling in and I realized that people liked what I was writing about and some were in the same boat as I was and it was a way for us to grow and get better together. However, it got a little uncomfortable because at times I felt like I was on full display with my hurts, wounds, and feelings out there for all to see. The other aspect was that there were many out there who had walked the same path I had walked and were looking for ways to get a grasp on life again. I continued and now I do get more likes than I used to, the site is “booming” as I was told earlier this week and it is doing fine.

It is not about the “likes,” it is about life from my perspective and what I have done to get myself back on track and back on the journey of life and if my story has helped someone than my writing or blogging has been well-worth the effort.

Daily writing prompt

Why do you blog?

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Things I Enjoy About Writing

It is hard to put into words. Writing has always been a way to bring out what is hiding inside. The insecurities, the pain, the worries, the lessons I have learned all take on a different persona when I see it in print or on my posts. It is a way of releasing what I need to release to move on.

I also relish the free reign my mind has to go to places I wouldn’t do as a person. Yes, it takes me places and the fantasy world is lit up and full of radiance as I dance there for a while. I have the ability to let go of things I have been holding inside and it gives me an avenue to look at it with different eyes, from a distance instead of right smack in the middle of it!

Writing has helped to calm the beast that I call my mind. An hour or more of writing and I walk away feeling calmer and my insides cleared of the clutter that often resides there and sometimes I am given a blank slate to start over again but it doesn’t happen all the time because I have too much clutter and it is going to take a long time before that part happens.

Writing is about stepping into a different role. One of observer rather than having lived. Not sure if that makes sense. I take on the role of observing, dissecting and making sense of what has transpired AND how to make it better. The act of writing helps me to go deep within and to get it out there so that my inner being can breathe again and in the process I hope my writing helps others who have walked the same path I have.

The joys of writing are plenty but for me it is my way of helping my psyche to deal with things and the other thing is, I get to paint pictures with words! If you can picture every detail as you read, the colors, the sounds, the feelings and much much more, than my writing has done what it started out to do.

Daily writing prompt

What do you enjoy most about writing?

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CAN’T!

I don’t know about many people but I do know that “can’t” is up there on my list of words that jump up and scare the hell out of me!

When it shows up, it means that I have to face something of the unsavory nature and not to my liking. I don’t like a lot of things, I’m a stick in the mud as I have said before but that’s not all. Fear steps in and “can’t” shows up before anything else. I dig my heels in and refuse to budge. Then, I go within and come up with excuses as to why I can’t. Believe me, there are plenty of reasons why and it doesn’t have to make sense either! It’s my tried and true method to fight whatever it is that is causing the problem and to keep changes at bay.

I’ve lived with “can’t” all my life and it has made my life miserable. Things could have been a lot easier if I had looked at the problem like any normal human being would do but instead I take the other route. The crazy route where I sweat bullets and convince myself that I just can’t do what is asked of me.

Making headway into this problem took a long time. My journey of self-discovery has helped but it still crops up when I least expect it. Old habits die hard as they say. Coming back to the Daily Prompt, I do think that there are people out there who have the same problem I do. We just don’t like changes but unfortunately, life is not going to take a “NO” for an answer. Learning to live with what comes your way, accepting the changes and taking small steps to change your perception of things does help. Here’s the thing, most of the problems I thought I couldn’t handle turned out to be the ones that taught me how capable I am of doing exactly that.

Daily writing prompt

What is a word you feel that too many people use?

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