quotes

Self-Love

According to one source, “Self-love means having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness. Self-love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being to please others.”

That said, when was the last time you talked to yourself with compassion? When was the last time you gave yourself some extra care and when was the last time you took care of your needs first. I don’t do those things often enough but it is necessary for your total well-being. Some days, I’m running around like a chicken with its head cut off taking care of others and on other days, I am my own worst critic. I am quick to blame and I stay there for a while to my own detriment. When I emerge from this destructive behavior, I am usually in a bad mood or everything seems just a tad gloomier.

We need to be nicer to the person we carry around. Compassion is needed and positive self-talk as well. Start by loving yourself first and it will create a ripple effect in the world around you. I think women are natural caregivers and in the process we forget to take care of ourselves. It’s time to stop and smell the roses even if it’s only for a little while. Enjoy the following quotes that bring “self-love” to the forefront and try to shine the spotlight on “YOU” for a change.

FRIENDLY REMINDER:

“It’s perfectly okay if the only exercise you get today is flipping the pages of a book or stirring your tea or smiling with friends. Well-being means your WHOLE body. Make sure your soul is getting as much exercise as your glutes.”

I sometimes forget to give my “soul” the same kind of attention I give to my body. Time to take note and do different.

“Love yourself enough to set boundaries. Your time and energy are precious. You get to choose how you use it. You teach people how to treat you by deciding what you will and won’t accept.” Anna Taylor

Another important point here. Set those boundaries so you know in which direction you’re headed.

“Self-confidence is a super power. Once you start to believe in yourself, magic starts happening.” Unknown

“Be proud of who you are, and not ashamed of how someone else sees you.” Unknown

It’s true isn’t it? How someone sees you is not your problem. You are enough as you are and always remember that.

Here are a few more for good measure.

“Don’t let your mind bully your body.”

“Remember how you show up for yourself is how you teach others to show up for you.”

“Choose yourself more.”

“Life is too short to be mean to yourself.”

“Less self judgment and more self compassion.”

“Choose people who choose you.”

“Live your life like the story you want to be in.”

And finally:

LOVE YOURSELF

YOU ARE ENOUGH AS YOU ARE!

Have an amazing day.

Love Lessons

Love as we know has many facets. It is not a one size fits all kind of thing. There is the love between a parent and child, there is the love between a pet and its owner, there is the love of material things but nothing is as powerful as the love that shows up and turns your world on its head and you don’t know if you’re coming or going. It is the kind of love that comes and touches your heart, sends your blood pumping and you are left wondering what happened?

However, this love between a man and woman has its ups and downs. Sometimes it goes smoothly and sometimes when you least expect it, you get the rug pulled out from under your feet. There is the kind that shows up and you are head over heels and the kind that doesn’t get the same response from the other person. There is the kind that takes you for a ride, the kind that breaks your heart into a thousand pieces and hurt becomes a part of loving. There is the kind that loves to play games and the kind that doesn’t give a hoot about your feelings. It is all part and parcel of this thing called love. If you are lucky, you find someone who looks at you and you’re IT and then there is the kind that does circles around you and keeps you guessing.

Different kinds of love but it has one thing in common. Love is powerful and it has the ability to turn an ordinary person into someone extraordinary or leaves you gasping for air. Love lessons they are aplenty and since I’m in this, “What is love really about?” mood, here are some quotes that speak to the heart of the matter.

“Some people teach you what love feels like. Others teach you what love is not. Both shape how you protect your heart.” Unknown

Been there, done that and there is truth in that quote.

“I don’t walk away to teach people a lesson, I walk away because I learned mine.” Unknown

Done this one too. Believe me, the walking away gets easier as time goes along.

Spend your time on those who LOVE you unconditionally. Don’t waste it on those who only love you when the conditions are right for them.” Unknown

Listen carefully to this one. When you are not the priority, leave! No point hanging around.

“Not all love lasts, but the lessons love brings to us do.” Mandy Hale

The absolute truth. Learn from the lessons and let go of the rest.

“Sometimes life sends us people who don’t love us enough, to remind us of what we’re worthy of.” Mandy Hale

This is painful but it is a lesson that has to be learned. You are worthy of real love and not the wishy washy kind. Pay attention to what is shown and take the right path. It is not going to be easy but worthiness comes from knowing who you are and what you will stand for. It demands courage as well to shut the door and to move on.

“Never chase love, affection, or attention. If it isn’t given freely by another person, it isn’t worth having.” Unknown

Quite often we do the chase or the dance or whatever name you give it but you know what I mean. Chasing love, affection, or attention quite often brings the opposite. Don’t chase, let it go and see what happens.

“Sometimes the bad things that happen in our lives put us directly on the path to the best things that will ever happen to us.” Nicole Reed

I think this one works on the same principle as karma does. Someone does something bad to you and if you believe in karma, I do, you know that at some point they will get their comeuppance. When? That’s the problem. There is no date or time given, just that it will take place at some point and you have to believe that it will. So when will good things start happening. Same thing. Wait for it and sooner or later it will happen. No fun? Yes, well, life moves to a different beat and all in good time because you have to learn before you reap the benefits, I suppose.

Enough about love? One last thing, love is many-faceted and it has its mysteries but one thing is for sure, WE CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT IT!!

Have an amazing day and I hope the right kind of love finds you.

Figure It Out

Photo by Tima Miroshnichenko on Pexels.com

“You don’t need to have it all figured out to take a step forward.” Unknown

This is the absolute truth. You don’t need to know everything before you take the next step forward but you have to trust in the process to move forward, one step at a time. You’ll get there.

“You don’t have a right to the cards you believe you should have been dealt.”

“You have an obligation to play the hell out of the ones you’re holding.” Unknown

This is where we go wrong I think. We want what we think we deserve but life has other plans for us. Go with what you have, work with what you have and make it the best set of cards for you and you’ll come out the winner. I have to remind myself of this as well the next time I moan and groan at the unfairness of it all!

“What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it’s supposed to be.” Unknown

The stories we tell ourselves can be the road to disaster. It screws us up. How it’s supposed to be and what you do to get there are two different things. It’s not going to fall into your lap, whatever it is that you want, it takes hard work and that is the truth of the matter.

“You don’t have to figure everything out today. You don’t have to solve your whole life tonight. And you don’t have to tackle everything at once. You just have to show up and try. You just have to focus on the most immediate thing in front of you. And you have to trust that you’ll figure out the rest along the way.” Daniel Koepke

Nice piece of advice that. Just keep moving, show up and you’ll be on your way.

“My life has a superb cast but I can’t figure out the plot.” Unknown

Okay this one speaks to yours truly! I can’t for the life of me figure out the plot. Perhaps it is best not to ask but to just trust that I have what it takes to make it and the rest will fall into place. Easier said than done!

“Obstacles don’t have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don’t turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.” Michael Jordan

This special piece of advice is what life is about. Giving up is not going to do it and as I often say, bite the bullet and keep on going.

TODAY

figure out what makes you happy and do more of it, figure out what doesn’t, and do – less of it. –

Mandy Hale

YOU WILL FIGURE IT OUT!

Have an amazing day.

Mandy Hale

New York Times best-selling author, speaker, and creator, Mandy Hale inspires women with her writing and I find her quotes to be exceptionally uplifting. If you’re feeling down, turn to them and they are bound to give you a boost in the right direction.

Here are some of her best quotes:

“You’re beautiful, just the way you are. Shine on, and dare anyone to turn off your lights.”

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!

“If they want to be in your life, they’ll find a way to be in your life. Otherwise, they’ll find excuses.”

That’s the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

“There is nothing more beautiful than someone who goes out of their way to make life beautiful for others.”

A smile, a kind word, or a soothing touch is all it takes to do just that.

“The most beautiful day is the day you decide you’re good enough for you. It’s the day you set yourself free.”

A good one but putting it into practice is the hard part.

“A busy, vibrant, goal-oriented woman is so much more attractive than a woman who waits around for a man to validate her existence.”

Women tend to do that but I think we are learning that our existence or rather our validation does not depend on a man. I hope so!

“To make a difference in someone’s life, you don’t have to be brilliant, rich, beautiful, or perfect. You just have to care.”

Perfectly said!

“No matter how much you stress or obsess about the past or future, you can’t change either one. In the present is where your power lies.”

This one knocked some sense into me. I love stressing and obsessing so a definite reminder to pay attention and to do different.

Too easy to get = just as easy to forget.

Absolutely and one to pay attention to.

Finally, I LOVE THIS ONE!

“You’ll learn, as you get older, that rules are made to be broken. Be bold enough to live life on your terms, and never, ever apologize for it. Go against the grain, refuse to conform, take the road less traveled instead of the well-beaten path. Laugh in the face of adversity and leap before you look. Dance as though everybody is watching. March to the beat of your own drummer. And stubbornly refuse to fit in.”

Have an amazing day.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

It is that time of the year again. The one where you scramble to show your significant other just how important they are. Roses, chocolates, nice dinners and so on come into play. According to one source, Valentine’s Day originated a long time ago, in 496 A.D. to honor St. Valentine. It turned from a religious feast to a romantic one in the 14th century. Now, it is a commercialized affair with cards, gifts and a love “gusto” that transcends the normal!

What is love?

“Love is a set of emotions and behaviors characterized by intimacy, passion, and commitment. It involves care, closeness, protectiveness, attraction, affection and trust.” http://www.verywellmind.com

I decided to look a little deeper and found some quotes that describe love in all its entirety and here are some of my favorites.

“So, I love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you.” Paulo Coelho

Paulo has a way with words and in the most romantic way. I’m still waiting to see what the universe has conspired for me.

“Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times.” Ann Landers

I like the next one a lot. Why? Because I am a romantic at heart and it speaks to my soul. See what I mean?

“Love is when he gives you a piece of your soul, that you never knew was missing.” Torquato Tasso

“I don’t want a perfect person. I just want someone to act silly with, someone who treats me well and loves being with me more than anything.” Unknown

“You don’t love someone for their looks, or their clothes or for their fancy car, but because they sing a song only you can hear.” Oscar Wilde

Oscar said it well, don’t you think? Simply beautiful but I haven’t found him yet. Still looking!

“The real lover is a man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space.” Marilyn Monroe

Who knew Ms. Monroe had it in her. The blonde bombshell went deeper than her looks and I love that quote.

Next is my girl, Carrie Bradshaw. She knows her love material well.

“I am someone who is looking for real love; ridiculous. inconvenient. consuming. can’t-live-without-each other love.”

“I’d like to think that people have more than one soulmate. If you miss one, along comes another. Like cabs.”

I am not too sure about that one. Perhaps they won’t be called soulmates anymore. Just run of the mill types who walk in and out of your life and that might be a more appropriate description.

My favorite of them all is this one below.

“The heart that’s meant to love you will fight for you when you want to give up, pick you up when you’re feeling down, and will give their smile when it’s hard for you to find yours. They will NEVER get strength from seeing you weak, power from seeing you hurt, or joy from seeing you cry. The heart that’s meant to love you wants to see the best of you, not the hurt you! Never forget that.” Trent Shelton

Feeling all loved up? I know I am.

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY! 😍💞💕♥️

RELAX (Archives)

Update: I’m still taking those small steps forward and I am seeing progress. The journey is ongoing and it seems to be a never-ending one but there are changes taking place. That, in itself, is a good thing.

“You will get there when you are meant to get there and not one moment sooner…so relax, breathe, and be patient.” Mandy Hale

These days ‘relax’ is a word that seems foreign to me. Once, a long time ago, it was the easiest thing to do. I could close my eyes anywhere and go to Nirvana Land at the drop of a coin but not anymore.

What changed? Life did. A divorce, the death of a close friend and life’s curveballs all had me standing at the brink and pulling myself back from staring into the abyss was hard to do but I did.

“At any given moment you have the power to say this is not how the story is going to end.” Unknown

I realized that I had the power within me to change what I didn’t like. Pulling myself back up and to keep going was even harder but I had no choice, it had to be done. I started by putting a 17 year marriage where it belonged. It was done and I had to move forward. I had to learn that ‘LOVE’ can and does end and I had no say in the matter. I couldn’t decide for the other person so I worked on the person I knew best. I went deep inside myself and then I heard the whisper and it said, “RELAX.” There was power there that much I knew. I took the steps to go back to what was always home to me. My inner self and to get there I had to learn to relax again. It was not easy, nothing ever is. The first few tries were a disaster. A few minutes was all I could do. It was frustrating but I learned to just breathe. Just simple in and out breathing, nothing fancy. The technique took very little time but I could feel it vibrating within me. I was coming alive again.

“If you don’t like where you are, change it. You’re not a tree.” Unknown

However, life wasn’t done with me yet. There were more lessons to be learned and it would not only test my resolve to do better but it would take me back to square one again. Eight years after my divorce, I would lose someone very dear to me and once again, it felt like the rug was being pulled out from under me. Goodbyes are hard but ‘forever’ goodbyes even more so. The peace I had felt within had disintegrated and now it lay scattered around my feet. I wanted what I couldn’t have but he was gone and I had to go it alone. Nothing I did and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t get myself to relax again. It felt like I was climbing walls where there was none to be found. I was back on that cliff and staring into a fog covered distance. Then I heard the whisper and it said, “RELAX. You’ll be fine.”

“Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life. Tip toe if you must, but take the step.” Unknown

I took those small steps because there was no other way. My plan of action was to keep taking those small steps until they turned to bigger steps and I could feel myself flying again. It took time, it took looking back at things I didn’t want to look at, it took discarding what no longer served me and most of all, it took courage to move ahead. I learned to relax. Breathing, meditating, walks, enjoying nature, working out, treating myself and learning to like myself all became a daily routine. I talked myself into loving me and to learn that I AM ENOUGH AS I AM. No, I’m not flying yet but I hope one day I will. I’m still taking those steps to move forward and learning to leave the past behind me. Relaxation is still hard but those few minutes a day have turned into more than 40 minutes a day. I am making progress.

“Don’t seek, don’t search, don’t ask, don’t knock, don’t demand…relax! If you relax, it comes. If you relax, it is there. If you relax, you start vibrating with it.” Osho

Breathe in, breathe out, RELAX.

Have An Amazing Day

The “Me” Concept (Archives)

Who am I? Sounds simple enough but this is a hard one to answer. It encompasses all of you, the big picture so to speak. Who you are, what you stand for, what shaped you and the experiences that have made you, the “YOU” of today are all part and parcel of this concept. Understanding yourself is vital to how you interact with the world around you. There is only one YOU, and your identity is unique. It is made up of your values, your beliefs, your relationships and your experiences and that in a nutshell is who you are as a person.

However, interacting with the world around you is not always an easy thing to do. It is much bigger than you are and sometimes downright scary. Here are some quotes that speak to the heart of the matter and might even help with where you are in the grand scheme of things as far as your world is concerned.

“Focus on the step in front of you, not the whole staircase.” Unknown

One step at a time if you want to get somewhere and looking at that whole journey might just be a tad too overwhelming to say the least. Do it slowly and carefully and you’ll get there when the time is right.

“Once you learn how to be happy, you won’t tolerate being around people who make you feel anything less.” Unknown

Absolutely worth taking a note of. How often do we hang around people who make us feel less than we are? It is time to clean house and start afresh with people worthy of your company.

“The problem isn’t that your friends aren’t showing up for you…

The problem is that you’re still calling them friends.” Unknown

“You become like the 5 people you spend the most time with.

Choose carefully” Unknown

How true? Choose your friends carefully and the rest will fall into place.

“If you ever find yourself in the wrong story,

LEAVE.” Mo Willems

If something is not working and it becomes a struggle, change your strategy. You are not stuck where you are, there is always a way out to start anew. You just need to have the courage to say “I can do this” and move on.

“She wanted something else, something different, something more, passion and romance, perhaps, or maybe quiet conversations in candlelit rooms, or perhaps something as simple as not being second.” Nicholas Sparks

There you have it. Stop being the option and start being the priority. Stop choosing people who do not choose you.

Understand this….

“You can sound confident and have anxiety. You can look healthy but feel like shit. You can look happy and be miserable inside. You can be good looking and feel ugly. So be kind, because every person is fighting a battle you know nothing about.” Unknown

Kindness matters so JUST BE KIND!

“Watch your thoughts, for they become words.

Watch your words, for they become actions.

Watch your actions, for they become habits.

Watch your habits, for they become character.

Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.”

This actually speaks to the whole concept of who you are. What you do eventually becomes your character. Choose wisely and do the right thing.

“Learn to be done with people, not mad, not bothered but just done.” Unknown

This is hard for someone like me. It takes a lot to say I am done but I am learning. Sometimes it is a matter of survival the choices you make. Choose wisely.

“In the end, she became more than what she expected. She became the journey, and like all journeys, she did not end. She simply changed directions and kept going.” Unknown

This last one is poignant. I have been on a journey of self-discovery and self-development for quite a while now. I am learning to give up what does not serve me, to change directions and to move towards what does. Not always easy I know but this is where self-awareness and self-worth comes in to guide you and to make it just a little less scarier than it is.

Have an amazing day.

Marc and Angel Chernoff are a husband-and-wife team and they are known for sharing their strategies for happiness and success. They are also known for authoring NYT bestsellers like Getting Back to Happy and 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently. Here are some of their noteworthy quotes. Enjoy.

“When things aren’t adding up in your life, begin subtracting. Life gets a lot simpler when you clear the clutter that makes it complicated. Bring your attention back to what’s important, and move forward.”

Great advice but the problem is, I clear the clutter and then I add new ones to the equation! A lost cause?

“Don’t fall back into your old patterns. Toxic habits and behaviors always try to sneak back in when you’re doing better. Stay focused.”

Totally agree, they do sneak back in when I’m doing better. At times it seems like it is done on purpose to throw me off course.

“Your worth is not dependent on someone else’s ability to be kind and loving. Accept this, and start acknowledging your own worth. Stop waiting for others to tell you how important you are. Tell yourself, and believe it.”

This is a really good one. Your self-worth depends on you.

“Remember, you alone get to choose what matters and what doesn’t. The meaning of everything in your life has precisely the meaning you give it.”

This one hit hard. I’ve been going about it the wrong way. I usually give meaning to things that don’t matter, that is my problem. Time to change that.

“Someday you will understand the reasons….that it had to happen, just the way it did….to give you the lessons you needed to grow. It’s never ideal, and it’s rarely easy, but what doesn’t break you today only makes you stronger in the end. Take a deep breath, and keep going.”

The problem, I want to know the reasons now! Oh well, I am moving forward, that’s for sure.

“Everything gets a bit uncomfortable when it’s time to change. That’s just a part of the growth process. Things will get better. Be patient.”

I’m at that uncomfortable place right now. Waiting for the “things will get better” part!

“Learn to trust the journey, even when you do not understand it. Sometimes what you never wanted or expected turns out to be what you need.”

Hmm…hard to grasp this one. I’m learning to trust the journey but it’s the last part that has me confused. Oh well, it will make sense I suppose when I get to journey’s end.

Have an amazing day.

Good Vibes

It’s Sunday and it is raining out there. The sky is gray and the wind is blowing. The storm is refusing to take a hike and it is driving me up the wall! I came up with a great idea to pep up my mood and these hilarious quotes helped to do just that. Hope you enjoy them as much as I did.

“My advice to you is get married. If you find a good wife you’ll be happy; if not, you’ll become a philosopher.” Socrates

Yup, there are many philosophers out there.

“Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.” Rod Stewart

Hmm…..okay never mind!

“A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children.” Dave Barry

I met several of those when my son was young and I had no book to go by.

“When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.” Rodney Dangerfield.

“The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they’re okay, then it’s you!” Rita Mae Brown

“The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies, probably because they are generally the same people.” G. K Chesterton

“If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.” George Carlin

“Sometimes you lie in bed at night and you don’t have a single thing to worry about. That always worries me!” Charlie Brown

ME TOO!

“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no use being a damn fool about it.” W. C. Fields

“When in doubt, look intelligent.” Garrison Keillor

Have a great Sunday folks.

Glennon Doyle (Archives)

She is an American author and queer activist and her podcast “We Can Do Hard Things” won two webby awards. She is empowering, inspirational and her quotes speak to and touch the heart. It has been said that when Glennon Doyle speaks, women listen and I’m one of those women.

“When a women finally learns that pleasing the world is impossible, she becomes free to learn how to please herself.”

Exactly where I’m at now.

“I looked hard at my faith, my friendships, my work, my sexuality, my entire life and asked, “How much of this was my idea? Who was I before I became who the world told me to be?”

I’ve asked myself the self-same question and the answer is, I was free as a bird!

“This life is mine alone. So I have stopped asking people for directions to places they’ve never been. There is no map, we are all pioneers.”

“I do not adjust myself to please the world. I am myself wherever I am, and I let the world adjust.”

I know this journey well. I am in the midst of it.

“I have met my self and I am going to care for her fiercely.”

Doing exactly that and I am seeing the benefits.

“We think our job as humans is to avoid pain, our job as parents is to protect our children from pain, and our job as friends is to fix each other’s pain. Maybe that’s why we all feel like failures so often – because we all have the wrong job description for love.”

This one made me stop in my tracks and to take a good hard look at what I’m doing.

“What I want to be, girls, is beautiful. Beautiful means ‘full of beauty.’ Beautiful is not about how you look on the outside. Beautiful is about what you’re made of. Beautiful people spend time discovering what their idea of beauty on this earth is. They know themselves well enough to know what they love, and they love themselves enough to fill up with a little of their particular kind of beauty each day.”

Beautifully said. What’s inside makes you shine on the outside and it can beat physical beauty hands down.

“Reading is my inhale and writing is my exhale.”

I haven’t done much inhaling lately but boy am I exhaling!

Have an amazing day and YOU ARE ENOUGH!