April 2025 – Page 7

Flexibility (Archives)

“We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails.” Unknown

If you are strong-willed as I am, this is a hard one to stomach or swallow. I think I’m as stiff as a rod when it comes to being flexible. I can bend and sway with the best of them but changing what I am accustomed to is a hard ask and it doesn’t happen easily for me. It takes a very long time. You can drag me to the water but making me drink is another thing altogether!

“True flexibility can only be achieved through constant adaptation to new circumstances.” Janna Cachola

Deepak Chopra says, “Flexibility opens infinite possibilities, rigidity closes them.”

And that right there is my problem. I am set in my ways and instead of adapting to changes, I usually want to control the situation hoping it will stay the same because adaptation in all its forms means accepting the inevitable and moving on and that is a hard thing to do. It doesn’t matter if “change” would bring about something better. I see it as this unknown monster that needs slaying in order to start anew and that is frightening to say the least.

I have to learn that, “Being flexible means not reacting but actively adjusting to life’s twists and turns. Face the unexpected with resilience, and every challenge becomes an opportunity.” Unknown

It’s not that I am a novice at adjusting to life’s twists and turns. I’ve had more than my share of it but each time something unforeseen happens and I’m left to stare change in the face, I pull back, run to the corner yelling, “Go Away! Leave Me Alone! Not You Again!”

Unfortunately, moving on and accepting changes is what life is all about isn’t it? Nothing remains the same forever, well maybe death but even then there are grey areas. So my next goal is to work with “flexibility” and embrace it as much as I can but not become best friends with it. I don’t want it showing up at my front door too often but when it does I will be gracious and in so doing, I hope it will leave me in peace!

“How strange that the grass is all that remains standing after the storm,” said the Boy.

“Sometimes being soft is strong,” said the Rabbit.

Flexibility is needed to go up against life’s challenges and change is often the result. Acceptance is the next step and moving on is inevitable. That said, flexibility is needed not to direct the wind, that is an impossible task, but to tweak it to where it is manageable and that folks takes many many lessons to learn. I know I’ll never be perfect at it, nothing in life ever is but I’m learning to stand my ground and to bend with resilience and to bounce back when necessary.

“Bamboo is flexible, bending with the wind but never breaking, capable of adapting to any circumstance. It suggests resilience, meaning that we have the ability to bounce back even from the most difficult times.” Ping Fu

Here’s to flexibility, you’re not my best friend but I hope you’ll be gentle with me the next time you come around.

Have an amazing day.

Volunteer Work

I like volunteering my time and energy for a worthy cause. Working in a hospital for a couple of hours a week would be great but hospitals are sad places and it brings back some bad memories so that would be out of the question for now.

Serving in a soup kitchen would be something I can really get into and it would be rewarding as well. It wouldn’t bring material benefits but that is not what volunteering is about. It is about giving your time freely and helping the needy. I think it would be a perfect fit and I would do that job for free gladly.

Daily writing prompt

What job would you do for free?

View all responses

Simply Beautiful!

My safe space…..

is in the wild open,

where there’s growing space……

and soul-searching space,

and where my fire is bright,

and my wings are wide,

and my breathing is all its own…..

and where I can always feel the way

my heart beats on its own. (butterflies rising)

I usually don’t go walking this early in the morning but my cat alarm clock, Chachi, the cat, and my other alarm clock set to wake me at 5:30 rang at the same time! Why so early? It is Chachi’s normal wake up time and my son who has his first job wanted to make sure he wouldn’t oversleep and since he is a responsible human, showing up for work is now his new normal even if he feels like he has “zero” life right now!

Coming back to the topic at hand. The sun is shining and it looks like a perfect morning for a walk. The air is crisp and fresh and the sun had found its nook in certain places while others remain steeped in shadow. It’s only a matter of time before the whole place is bathed in sunshine and the rabbits and the deer will come out to play.

My usual path feels rocky today or it just seems that way. On both sides, the rapeseed plants are knee-high and soon they will put forth their beauty and the whole landscape will be a striking yellow and simply beautiful to behold. Just another aspect of spring but a breathtaking one nonetheless. In the distance, the pear trees are in bloom their pink and white blossoms adding color to the scene before me.

Suddenly I realize “beautiful” doesn’t even begin to cover it. It is gorgeous, breathtaking, mesmerizing and solace can be found in its midst. As I stand here, one lone human being against the majesty of nature, I feel the power that nature has to soothe a ruffled soul, to calm a frazzled nerve, to whisper sweet nothings with a promise of more to come and to surround you with unadulterated peace.

I am grateful for all that I see and feel. It is going to be a wonderful day.

Have an amazing day.

Karma (Archives)

In Sanskrit, karma literally means “action.” In Hinduism, karma is defined as, “the relationship between a person’s mental or physical action and the consequences following that action.” Basically, it is the cause and effect of what a person has done in their current and previous lives. Simply put, what you sow, you reap.

I’ve always had a deep fascination with the concept of karma. I want to believe that if you do wrong or hurt someone knowingly, you will get payback from karma. I wouldn’t have to lift a finger and Karma, my friend, would take care of it lock, stock and barrel and maybe even with two smoking barrels! Nice thought but it rarely happens that way. Sometimes payback takes a long time coming and in our world of instant gratification where we expect everything to happen at the drop of a coin, karma takes its time and does it the old-fashioned way. Which means it could take many years even ten to 20 years or more before payback happens but rest assured when it does come around, you will know.

“A boomerang returns back to the person who throws it.” Vera Nazarian

Is it considered revenge? I think it is more like a higher power keeping tabs on you. It watches, keeps track and when the time is right, the anchor falls and you get payback. Makes sense I think. Afterall, someone has to keep tabs, otherwise, wrongdoing would be the name of the game and everyone walks off scot-free with a smile plastered on their faces only to repeat the same mistakes over and over again. It’s a good thing that karma is there.

Karma Says

“Mouths can lie, eyes cannot. People may forget, karma will not.” Unknown

However, karma is not just about the bad stuff.

“Good or bad, what you put out comes back to you.” Unknown

I know of one situation where a man cheated on his wife. It was a terrible thing to do and instead of being sorry, he married the woman he had the affair with. It looked like all was well and life was going swell for the two of them. Twenty years down the road, the new wife found someone else and rode off into the sunset with her new love leaving her husband devastated. A karmic consequence?

Benjamin Bayani says, “Karma bides its time. You will always have to watch out. Karma is unforgiving and always gets payback.”

All just hocus pocus? I don’t know folks but I tend to be superstitious as well so it sounds perfectly legit to me. I like the idea of good vs. bad and payback in some form or fashion.

By the way, karma

“I have a list of people that you missed!” Unknown

Have an amazing day.

Figure-Skating

I find it elegant and oh so graceful. It’s incredible how they (the skaters) can glide over ice and do what they do with so much ease. I can spend hours watching them and I did try it, ice-skating, but I found out that I am a major klutz when it comes to skating along with other things!

I recall I was in Alabama at the time. A group of us went to a huge skating rink there. I had never skated before and at first I wanted to get out there but after a few falls I realized this sport wasn’t for me. Even with two people holding me, one on each side, I kept falling! It was embarrassing to say the least and I couldn’t wait to get out of the rink AND I saw my dreams of being a ice dancer go up in flames!

Watching the beautiful and graceful skaters do their thing as they move around the ice so effortlessly is mesmerizing. It is one sport I can spend hours watching AND live vicariously through them!

Daily writing prompt

What Olympic sports do you enjoy watching the most?

View all responses

Simplify (Archives)

A few weeks ago, I wrote about cleaning out my shoe closet, bagging up and getting rid of tons, yes tons of shoes that were taking up space. They were no longer needed because all they were doing was simply staring me in the face and living rent-free in my closet. It was time for them to go. Decision made but it was with a heavy heart that I gave them their freedom. They were free to go light up someone else’s eyes and perhaps more appropriately to go where they were truly needed.

“Fill your life with lots of experiences, not lots of things. Have incredible stories to tell, not incredible clutter in your closets.” Marc and Angel

I think life is simply an accumulation of holding on to things. It is a collection of things taking up space, emotions that surge and thrive on shaky ground and a constant struggle between the two. Clutter helps to shrink your physical space and minimize your mental capabilities. Letting go is hard and for someone like me who holds on for way longer than it is needed, decluttering is an almost impossible task to do.

“Clutter is not just the stuff on your floor – it’s anything that stands between you and the life you want to be living.” Peter Walsh

The problem is you can’t move on when you’re holding on to all that is not needed. There must be a conscious decision and effort to “clean house” meaning letting go of things that no longer serve you. Things and emotions that wear you down, make you lose track of where you need to go, which direction you will have to take to get there and most importantly a decision has to be made to let go, get rid off and open up space maybe for new clutter but the truth is, there is no moving forward if you’re standing still. You can’t do both.

“Simplifying your life isn’t just about decluttering your physical space, it’s also about clearing mental and emotional clutter.” Unknown

Understanding that, you’ve got to declutter. Most of us tend to have an iron grip on things that don’t matter and then we wonder why it is so hard to breath at times or to feel free. If it is not adding value to your life, let it go. If it is just taking up space, dump it. If it makes you feel like you’ve got to do something about it, that’s a clear signal that action is needed.

Focus, declutter, simplify, simplify, simplify. As for people and emotions:

“If your presence can’t add value to my LIFE, your absence will make no difference.” Unknown

Have an amazing day.

Inclusivity

I would try adding inclusivity programs. The village is old and the people mostly set in their ways. They view all newcomers with suspicion. Most of them grew up here and have never left home. It is not only a village that embraces old worldviews and ideals but it is also steeped in tradition. Sometimes I think it is a village that time forgot, the old cobblestone streets hold secrets and a rich history is part and parcel of its makeup. The outside world is frightening and they view everyone who comes in from somewhere else with suspicion first and so people who dare to come in here have a hard time integrating and no matter how hard they try, it is a losing battle.

When I first came here, I was met with the same. However, it took learning the language and a smile each time I came across resistance to break through that wall. It is home to me now and the people see me as one of them but others are not so lucky. So I would start some kind of grassroots program bringing people together, a safe zone where they can learn about each other, experience the different kind of foods offered and try to break down that wall! The village is close-knit so it won’t be easy but where there is a will, there is a way as they say.

Daily writing prompt

How would you improve your community?

View all responses

Gratitude (Archives)

Zig Ziglar called it the healthiest of all human emotions and it is one that is often overlooked in our day to day existence of what we call “living.” It is unpretentious, it takes its place quietly in the ranks of emotions and waits to be recognized like a step child who is often left wanting. More often than not we walk past without giving it the recognition it deserves.

“Gratitude helps you see what’s there instead of what isn’t.” Unknown

What is gratitude?

Simply put and according to graygroupintl.com, “It is a deep sense of appreciation for the good things in our lives, both big and small. It is about recognizing the positive aspects and expressing gratitude for them. When we practice gratitude, it not only benefits our mental health but also our physical well-being.”

If it is that important, why hasn’t this poster-child for good mental health been given more attention and accolades?

Perhaps, it is because as humans we have a tendency to overlook the “good stuff” and we tend to focus on the lack thereof and all the negatives it entails. If only I had this, then life would be so much better is the mantra we wear with pride and have hone it to an art form that we are blinded to the abundance that surrounds us.

“Wear gratitude like a cloak and it will feed every corner of your life.” Rumi

Practice it daily and it will turn your life around. I still haven’t grasped this concept of being grateful but I am working on it.

How do you practice gratitude? According to mindful.org, the people in the know, it starts like this and if you do it regularly, “it is a game-changer; it has far reaching effects, from improving our mental health to boosting our relationships with others. Living your life with gratitude helps you notice the little wins— and over time strengthens your ability to notice the good.”

Start by observing. Notice the thank yous you say.

Keep a journal of all that you are grateful for and believe me there is plenty to be thankful for.

Make a vow to be grateful everyday.

Meditate – anchor yourself to the good things in your life. Be mindful and live in the present.

The day before was a tough day. Things just didn’t go the way I wanted it to and so my focus was on all the bad stuff which in turn helped me to go further down the rabbit hole. At the end of the day I decided that today would be better. The gratitude part didn’t come till later. I went ahead and booked a massage and as I was lying on the table, face down and staring into nothingness, listening to the soothing music in the background, a small voice said, “Say thank you.” I did and I repeated it several times just in case it didn’t hear me the first me! As the masseuse applied gentle strokes to my back, I realized that I was surrounded with and by abundance.

I slowly started counted off the things I was grateful for and the list was never-ending. The gorgeous day, the blue skies, my friends, the people who cared about my existence and last but not least the wonderful massage that helped to soothe my frazzled nerves. It was a game-changer. I walked out of there with a smile on my face, my woes forgotten for the moment at least and well-prepared for the day ahead.

If you can’t afford a massage even the simplest of things will do it. Go for a walk, pay attention to the sights and sounds, things that help to lift up your soul. It could be as simple as taking in a deep breath, or watching a bird in flight or a tree in bloom, its colors mesmerizing and the scent wafting by better than any artificially manufactured perfume but most of all say, “THANK YOU.” Be grateful for the abundance surrounding you, the roof over your head, the food, nature and all the little and big things that help to make up your life and soon the glass will no longer be half empty but overflowing. A friend said to me, “you need to do what you preach,” and he is right. Thank you friend for being my friend!

Practicing gratefulness is helping to turn things around in my life. It doesn’t come easily but the more I say thank you and appreciate what is around me, the less I see the negatives not that they aren’t there mind you, but to a lesser extent. This too takes time.

“When you are grateful, fear disappears and abundance appears.” Tony Robbins

Have an amazing day.

Covid-19

It came out of nowhere and kept us captive for a long long time. Things changed and life was all about that mask and those tests. I hated it but it was needed at the time.

I don’t remember much except that people were distrustful of each other and staying home was warranted. Life was a blur because I was going through something else. Something very emotional. A close friend was in the last stages of life and I remember how difficult it was to see him in the hospital. Hospital visits were not allowed. He was in ICU and I wasn’t allowed to visit. When he came out of it, visitations could only be made after a Covid test was done and you were pronounced Covid-free. I remember how frustrated I used to get about all the extra time needed to just make a hospital visit. This went on for several weeks and it drained me of energy.

Adapting to something that came out of nowhere and made the world pay attention required a certain mindset. It needed strength, resilience and a narrow-minded focus but I think more than that it required working together to beat this disease caused by the SARS-CoV-2 virus. Mistrust was rife and a cough in the supermarket sent many running for cover, well, perhaps not running but they certainly kept their distance! Learning to cope within four walls was difficult for some but I mastered it like a champ. These days I am grateful when I walk into crowded spaces and don’t have to reach for my mask!

Daily writing prompt

How have you adapted to the changes brought on by the Covid-19 pandemic?

View all responses

Life is Fragile (Archives)

Photo by eberhard grossgasteiger on Pexels.com

Dedicated to someone who was very dear and near to me. You’ve moved on but the memories of a spirit that was kind and loving still remains. Fly high wherever you are and I know that you are in a better place. I do miss you especially when I take my walks alone. Sometimes I feel your presence and sometimes I talk to you. I’m sure you are giving heaven a run for the money!

“When you see how fragile and delicate life can be, all else fades into the background.” Jenna Morasca

I got a call from a friend yesterday. She told me that she had been in the hospital for a week. All is well with her but it was a scary experience. It brought home the fact that life in all its beauty is still as fragile as can be.

A year and a half ago, I lost someone very close to me. We never thought that life with all its idiosyncrasies would throw a curveball. One so large and unexpected that when all was said and done, only one of us would be left standing to carry on.

The walk in the snow-covered world was exhilarating. Everything was covered in white and the trees looked like pictures out of a postcard. It also brought back times when we had taken those walks together. The times when snowball fights and laughter reigned supreme. Little did we know then that life as we knew it was about to change forever.

“You never think the last time is the last time. You think that there will be more. You think you have forever. But then life can quickly remind you, you don’t” Grey’s Anatomy

What if we knew that life was short? What then? Would we try to cram as much living as we can into today? Perhaps knowing just how fragile life is should make us stop and take notice, to stop procrastinating and to do and say the things we need to say before it is too late. I wish I had.

Today as I approach the top of the hill, I remember that snow-filled day as you said, “I want a selfie with the both of us in it.” We were laughing in the picture. Now I realize that there will be no more pictures, no more memories to be made and no more laughter to be shared. You’ve gone on a different journey.

I’ve said many things to you since you’ve been gone. Nothing seems enough, perhaps one day it will be and memories of you will fade and I will be at peace. Here are more of the same, more of what I wished I had said when you were here.

Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for all the times we shared. Thank you for showing me just how much love you could squeeze into that little amount of time. Thank you for showing me that I was an important part of your life. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Life is fragile. All it takes is one wrong move, one unexpected turn of events and like a candle in the wind, it can be snuffed out never to be relit again. Forever is not in its vocabulary and neither is invincible. Knowing that we should make time for the important things in life, free up space by letting go of the unimportant ones and take the time to say and do the things you need to do before it is too late.