freedom – Site Title

Things That Rattle!

Things that rattle can be used, “to describe things that are unsettling, unstable, or cause anxiety.”

Friday started out great. I was up early, the sun was out and I was ready to take a walk in nature. My mind was clear and devoid of unsettling stuff, the kind that accompanies me on my daily walks but yesterday, it had gone into hiding and for once, I was feeling like a blank slate not that it happens often. Most days that slate is overflowing with things that even Einstein would have a hard time figuring out.

Anyway, off I went to my favorite place in the world. The fields. It was quiet, calm and just waking up. However, the farmers were already there getting their tractors ready to break the silence. I waved and they waved back. Taking my usual route, I headed to the apple trees. Visibility was clear on both sides since the farmers had done their job of cutting down the Rapeseed plants. Claustrophobia was nowhere to be seen either. I did a quick walk and just as they started their engines, I headed back to tackle the day.

I was at peace and ready for another cup of coffee. The day was beginning on a good note. Just then, the phone started ringing, the sound jarring. It was too early for a phone call and probably nothing good I thought.

The voice on the other end sounded agitated.

SHE: “You forgot your appointment this morning.”

ME: “What appointment?”

SHE: “Your haircut appointment.”

Oh God! The rattling was taking off and the “peace” of a few minutes ago was shattered and in pieces at my feet!

A quick glance in my appointment book confirmed it but somehow I had the wrong date on it. The rattling was louder now. I apologized profusely and made a note to bring some chocolates the next time I showed up there.

The rest of the day took a deep dive because I was too busy wondering what I could do to make up to them. It’s funny how “small things,” can take you on a path of unrest, uneasiness, and total chaos! That blank slate was filling up at an alarming rate and not with anything of the good kind! Suddenly, the “new me” stepped in. The one who wants “peace” as her mainstay. No cape needed, all I had to do was to shut it down! The constant chattering was shown the door and not too ceremoniously either! I had made my peace with the situation and I will rectify it at a later point in time. Now it was enough. No more “what ifs,” just PEACE! It is amazing what your mind can do when told to “heel” in a no-nonsense tone. It took its cue and left me in peace.

“You don’t have to control your thoughts. You just have to stop letting them control you.” Dan Millman

Have an amazing Sunday.

Simplify (Archives)

A few weeks ago, I wrote about cleaning out my shoe closet, bagging up and getting rid of tons, yes tons of shoes that were taking up space. They were no longer needed because all they were doing was simply staring me in the face and living rent-free in my closet. It was time for them to go. Decision made but it was with a heavy heart that I gave them their freedom. They were free to go light up someone else’s eyes and perhaps more appropriately to go where they were truly needed.

“Fill your life with lots of experiences, not lots of things. Have incredible stories to tell, not incredible clutter in your closets.” Marc and Angel

I think life is simply an accumulation of holding on to things. It is a collection of things taking up space, emotions that surge and thrive on shaky ground and a constant struggle between the two. Clutter helps to shrink your physical space and minimize your mental capabilities. Letting go is hard and for someone like me who holds on for way longer than it is needed, decluttering is an almost impossible task to do.

“Clutter is not just the stuff on your floor – it’s anything that stands between you and the life you want to be living.” Peter Walsh

The problem is you can’t move on when you’re holding on to all that is not needed. There must be a conscious decision and effort to “clean house” meaning letting go of things that no longer serve you. Things and emotions that wear you down, make you lose track of where you need to go, which direction you will have to take to get there and most importantly a decision has to be made to let go, get rid off and open up space maybe for new clutter but the truth is, there is no moving forward if you’re standing still. You can’t do both.

“Simplifying your life isn’t just about decluttering your physical space, it’s also about clearing mental and emotional clutter.” Unknown

Understanding that, you’ve got to declutter. Most of us tend to have an iron grip on things that don’t matter and then we wonder why it is so hard to breathe at times or to feel free. If it is not adding value to your life, let it go. If it is just taking up space, dump it. If it makes you feel like you’ve got to do something about it, that’s a clear signal that action is needed.

Focus, declutter, simplify, simplify, simplify. As for people and emotions,

“If your presence can’t add value to my LIFE, your absence will make no difference.” Unknown

Have an amazing day.

My Sacred Place

It has been almost two weeks since I set foot in my sacred space. My daily walks in nature had come to a screeching halt. The rains along with the gusty winds had moved in and walking was the last thing on my mind.

However, I had missed my forays in nature and today that want was back in full force. I needed the freedom of being out in nature. This feeling of being caged in had to go so I found myself back on the familiar pathway again. It somehow felt different. The rapeseed plants were still there and they had grown a lot taller blocking visibility in every direction. The golden blooms were no longer there and now the plants stood swaying and dancing with the wind. I could feel claustrophobia taking hold. I wasn’t liking this one little bit.

The farmers around here are well-regimented and they’ve got crop-rotation down to a science but for some reason, they’ve let the plant life get out of control this time around. Could it be the rain? Whatever it was, I kept to the graveled pathway and decided to cut my walk short, unrest seeping in. I like open spaces but today I felt fenced in. I don’t know why and that bugged me to no end.

Making my way back I notice that the sun is slowly making a showing but the winds are still in full force. It’s as if nature can’t make up its mind but I know that this too shall pass and summer will come traipsing back in. I just hope that the farmers will get back to work making the fields visible so that my soul can fly again.

Have an amazing day.

Let It Go

Letting go is one of the hardest lessons to learn in life. Holding on is somehow innately built into the human system and we are wired to hold on when things go wrong. At least, that is the case with me. If only I had the ability to “let go” when I knew that there was no point in holding on. Life would be so much easier right? Knowing that doesn’t make it any easier. I am an overthinker, an overachiever and a hold on with a death grip type of person. At times I am well aware that the ship has set sail and is out of sight but I keep looking longingly out to sea hoping it would return and everything would be alright but most times, it never does and still I refuse to let go.

“One of the hardest lessons in life is letting go. Whether it’s guilt, anger, love, loss or betrayal. Change is never easy. We fight to hold on and we fight to let go.” Unknown

The hard thing about letting go is the fear factor. The unknown is always scary. We tend to fixate on what was instead of realizing that it is done with, a thing of the past and it’s time to move on. The pieces remain of what once was, be it a lesson learned or pieces to build a future with but only if we stop looking at that closed door and turn towards the one that is open BUT going through it is like leading a horse to water but making it drink is another story altogether.

Shannon Alder says:

“Forget what hurt you but NEVER forget what it taught you.”

If only it was that easy. Speaking from experience and being the proverbial holder on, I know that there were times when I dug in my heels and refused to budge because it was what was behind that closed door that I wanted. It didn’t matter that it was bad for me and it didn’t matter that it was gone, water under the bridge so to speak and still I held on for dear life. I cried a waterfall when I could have saved those tears if only I had taken the first step to go through that open door. Freedom comes in letting go which in turn gives you the ability to fly because nothing is weighing you down anymore. I am learning not to stay in one place too long, to look back and to gather the lessons I have learned and when the time is right to keep moving forward. Life is for living, not just existing and being stuck in one place is an absolute no go. It is in moving forward that you learn the power of letting go, the power of living again.

“Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.” Oprah Winfrey

LET GO!

Have an amazing day.