Tag: nervous

Two Weeks to Go!

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Time sure does fly but I’m not having fun! It is four weeks after my first operation and things are going well. When I bring up the second OP to friends and how nervous I am they say, “You’ll be just fine! Look at how well you did with the first one.”

My thought, “Please don’t jinx it!” Yeah, I’m superstitious but more than that this second one coming up is bugging me. It will be a similar procedure and they’ll be going in the same way so this means the healing that has taken place so far will be disturbed once again and that is a scary thought. What if it doesn’t heal this second time around?

Yes, those “what ifs,” are more than scary. I’ve packed my bag, a smaller one than the last time since I didn’t use most of the stuff I brought with me. I hung out in the hospital “Krankenhauskittel” as they call it here with a kimono thrown over for modesty. A kittel is a hospital gown,that has a gaping opening at the back. I hated it but it did the job well enough and I felt as free as a bird as well! Just kidding.

If I’m lucky they’ll let me go home the same day after the operation. What?!! Exactly what I said but the doctors think that I should be okay. If anything like severe bleeding happens, call emergency services immediately and come back in was what they said. I’m a worrywart so all kinds of things are going through my head. What if I have severe bleeding? What if my blood pressure dips? What if I lose consciousness? What if? What if? What if? Get the picture? I am a doctor’s worst nightmare!

Anyway, next week I will meet with the doctors for a last minute talk so I can ask away to my heart’s content. No, actually they will do the prep which will take about 3 to 4 hours. Why that long? The last time I went through this, I met with different people, had a needle stuck in me, blood was taken, urine sample was next and then the doctors came in. I had a whole lot of questions for them all compiled by my Google doctors and by the time I left, they had heard an earful! This time around will be no different. I am prepared and I have a pageful of questions!

Google doctors are NOT real people!

I know but I like them a lot and I think they like me. Keeping them busy is what I do on a daily basis and I will say this, they know what they are talking about. I got loads of help from them this last time and they helped with the healing process.

I can hear my friend screaming, “I still hate them!” He means Google.

I don’t, I have a love affair going with all of them or is it just one? I don’t know and I don’t care!

The question I left out this time is, “Will I die?!!” Otherwise, I have all the pertinent questions, at least I think they are. I am pepping myself up, working out, yes working out. I am up to 30 minutes now with the walking and I have started strength training as well. So far, so good.

I haven’t taken a walk to the fields yet. That might be pushing it so I’ll leave it out for now. I went grocery shopping with a friend today and she did all the heavy lifting since I am still watching that part of it carefully. I walk up and down the stairs with no problems and I’m basically doing the mundane day to day stuff with no problems. Of course, I’m watching my diet but I did buy two slices of cheesecake and I took one tablespoon of it and knew it was a mistake so they are still sitting in the fridge. My Chilean friend, Max, will be coming by later this morning to help me with something so that will be his reward along with a nice cup of coffee.

I hope I don’t start climbing walls again when the time draws closer. Knowing me I’ll not only be climbing walls but staying up there once I get there!

Let’s see how this goes.

Have an amazing day.

It Was Smooth Sailing!

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I did the test drive and came off looking like a winner. It was nerve-racking when I got there and the guy at the dealership asked, “Ready to do the test drive?” with a big smile on his face. I stuttered, “I think so.” He laughed and said, “I’ll be right next to you so nothing will go wrong.”

The car wasn’t exactly like the one I’m looking at. The guy reassured me that it will be ok. I CAN drive this one too. It had a few new-fangled things but I decided to ignore them and hoped they would ignore me too! I took my seat, adjusted the mirrors like a pro, fastened the seatbelt and started the engine! So far, so good. I had to make the car move which meant taking my foot off the brake pedal and that took some time coming. Finally, we moved out of the parking area, into the short street leading to the main road and I told myself, “Calm down!” I waited till I could merge and took off.

Surprisingly the car was very quiet. He said it was on the electric mode and that little symbol on the dash shows you that. Where?!! He went on to explain that it does it automatically so nothing to worry about. It had some nice features, it showed the temperature outside, it showed the speed limit I should be doing and did a tiny beep or two when I exceeded what I was supposed to be doing. It was compact, it handled well, and I liked how it felt! I was so comfortable that we talked the whole way during the drive. He also mentioned that I was driving the car like I had been driving it for a long time and not just today. Wow! Sales pitch? I don’t know but I liked driving the car. Doing the reverse was a breeze and this thing had cameras everywhere!

We pulled back into the park place at the dealership and I was almost ready to say, “I’ll take it!” Knowing me, I took the cautious route. We went back into his office and he offered me more than I expected for my current car. Hmm….I couldn’t believe it but still I couldn’t make the “horse drink from the water.” So, I asked a few more questions. He told me the guarantee was for 5 years and I could pay to have it for 10 years. Then he went on to say, “What could go wrong? You have a new car.”

ME: “A lot could go wrong according to what Google told me and the well-meaning friends who have been helping me.”

However, I kept my mouth shut. Am I taking it? I asked for a day or two to make up my mind. He agreed and said, “I will hear from you on Wednesday?”

ME: “Yes, I think you will.”

As I left his office, I was glad to be out of there. It felt like I had accomplished something. Basically, the test-drive that had been taunting me all weekend, I achieved it without batting an eye and I gave myself a pat on the back for that. Have I made up my mind? What do you think?!!

I’ve roped someone else to go look at some other cars tomorrow. Why? Just because it is a lot of money and I want to be absolutely sure I’m making the right decision. Just like the guys I date you say?

Exactly.