Some of you may know of my addiction to cheesecake as I’ve been posting about it often enough here.
I consider myself to have tremendous willpower and those who have gotten through that barrier were allowed to do so on my terms. However, I’ve met my match and it wasn’t made in heaven!
This creamy concoction of cream cheese and all things nice has taken hold and ever since that first bite I’m a prisoner in every sense of the word! What happened to willpower? It has given up and is hiding somewhere.
Let me tell you, I’ve tried my best but my best doesn’t seem to be enough to get rid of this addiction. I make it for a week and then I hear it calling my name. Within seconds, I am sitting down to a nice slice of scrumptious cheesecake and a cup of coffee. It’s heaven if you ask me. It (the cheesecake) knows that I’m putty in its hands!
I tried getting rid of the “fixer.” I call him the cheesecake guy. He brings or used to bring me a whole cheesecake every weekend. Half of a plain no frills variety and a cherry filled one. The problem was I had a never-ending supply of cheesecake and every time I walked by the fridge, it called and I obliged! So, it was time to get rid of the source. It wasn’t that difficult to do since I am getting rid of the “menfolk” to work on myself. However, the “no cheesecake” policy is much harder. Something seems to be missing.
No worries. There is still the bakery where the ladies who work the counter always greet me with a knowing grin. “One cheesecake?” Yes, they know me well. I broke down and bought a whole cheesecake yesterday and had a slice for breakfast today! Nope, it is not going well. I’m still hooked on this piece of nothingness and who would have thought that IT would be my biggest nemesis. Time to work on winning the battle. If there is one thing I know about myself, it is that I’m up for challenges and I KNOW I CAN BEAT THIS ADDICTION!
I can say a lot of things here and pick some influential people who changed life for the better but I’m going to go with someone who makes my life a joy and one who is there from the moment I wake up to the time I turn off the lights and go to sleep.
If I could, I would like to be Chachi, the cat, or rather Little Einstein as he likes to be called. Some might say pick a person but this little furball is a person to me. I would like to see life through his eyes for a change. Sometimes I wonder what he thinks as he looks at me with those big green eyes, I see love but it might be something else altogether! I want to see what is missing in his life and what could be made better.
The little bundle of joy has me wrapped around his paws in more ways than one. I think a cat’s life can’t be beat well I am speaking about HIS! There is nothing to worry about, life is a breeze and now that I’ve removed the big Japanese cherry tree from the kitchen window, Chachi has a wide-screen TV! He spends his days following me around like a second shadow and his needs are taken care of. When he is bored, he sleeps the day away and when he feels like company, it’s Mommy time! Cuddles, hugs, and kisses are all part of his daily existence and he gets plenty of those. So I say, I would like to be Chachi for a day. The laid-back existence is appealing and “no thinking” and “no worries” makes it a life I would like to experience for a day.
Daily writing prompt
If you could be someone else for a day, who would you be, and why?
It was a disaster of a presser but ONLY Donald J. Trump can ignore all the symptoms of a failing presidency and TRY to come across as a winner.
This latest presser had him rolling out all he has done and is about to do which left many of us cringing in our seats as to the massive dismantling of government as we know it AND foreign policy like never seen before. Where’s the crown? It’s there and “the emperor with no clothes” has no qualms about spreading rumors and lies amongst other things.
He’s come up with something new sitting on that golden throne in the wee hours of the morning. It’s the 5 million dollar GOLD CARD! Hmm….it’s meant for his kind of people if you know what I mean. The man is losing it and royally!
What’s with the two henchmen standing to the left and right of him with their hands crossed in front? Remind you of anything? Godfather comes to mind! It was a disaster of a presser just like all that he and the co-president are doing!
Words have incredible power and they can either build or break someone down. The saying, “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me,” is so far from the truth. Words have the ability to stay with you, work within you and long after all is said and done, it can still show up years down the road and still have the power to hold court if allowed to do so.
Flippancy with words comes easily to some and to some cutting you down to size using a few choice words is a daily affair. Choose your words carefully and be kind with what you put out there because unlike that quote, words do have the power to hurt and to break someone down.
Here are some quotes that hit the nail on the head:
“Words and hearts should be handled with care for words when spoken and hearts when broken are the hardest things to repair.” Unknown
“Before you say something to someone, always think about how you’d feel if someone told you the same thing.”
I like this next one a lot.
“If only our tongues were made of glass,
how much more careful we would be when we speak.” Unknown
“The world is full of hurtful words. It is full of hate. It is full of people pushing others away. Tripping them with words. Words have the same power to cause harm as a stick or rock. We need to be better than that. To learn, to understand, to refuse to be the hurt.” Unknown
“Be careful what you say. You can say something hurtful in ten seconds, but ten years later, the wounds are still there.” Joel Osteen
“The only limits that exist are the ones in your own mind.” Unknown
A limiting belief is defined as,”a state of mind or belief about yourself that restricts you in some way. And these beliefs are often false accusations you make about yourself that can cause many negative results. Essentially, they are the lies you tell yourself, and if you allow them to continue, they define you.” http://www.linkedin.com
We all have them and we use them to define who we are as a person and what we are capable of achieving. Most of these beliefs carry negative connotations and they are designed to keep us from moving ahead in life. Here are some of them.
I am not good enough! This one is very familiar at least to yours truly. Quite often, I use this as my mantra to keep me in my rabbit hole. I venture out to take a peek and then I rush back into the hole where I am most comfortable. If I could, I would stay there forever but than again even rabbits come out to play from time to time and to observe life as it passes by. Partake or not, that is up to you. What does, “I’m not good enough,” really mean? It is a mindset that is well-ingrained into your psyche and once it has taken hold, it is next to impossible to get rid off. Perhaps changing the negative to the positive might help. I AM GOOD ENOUGH! Say those words often enough and it might just give that not so friendly sod, a heave and a ho and send it packing.
“Limiting Beliefs have one goal…..to keep you from leaving your Comfort Cave so you can’t grow and reach your greatest potential.” Unknown
I don’t have enough time…..this is another crippling lie and it is not true. If you look at the amount of time we waste propped up in front of the TV or sitting hunched over our lap top doing nothing much except to let these two gadgets dictate how we spend our time and nothing more. Truth is, you and I know that we have the time to do better things. We just need to do less of one and more of the things that contribute to our lives and crush those limiting beliefs that keep us from achieving our goals.
The next lie is one that loves to keep you in your place. If only I was taller, prettier, skinnier…..the list goes on and you get the drift. This one is designed to shrink you to 1/2 or a 1/4 of the size you actually are. Each time you repeat and accept this mantra in your head, you see this short, fat and ugly person staring back at you. It is not the reality but one you’ve chosen to accept as your reality. You, no matter what your size, height, weight or looks have just as much to offer this world than the other person. Pat yourself on the back and go conquer the world! I heard a saying once that goes like this. “Walk in like God sent you!”A good one to hold close to your chest and to pull out at those moments when you feel lacking or feeling smaller than you actually are.
Limiting beliefs need constant work. They are not easy to overcome but with time, effort and a conscious effort to defeat them, you’ll find yourself on the other side of the fence, the side that is more positive and forgiving but if nothing helps than perhaps this will.
“Do the uncomfortable. Become comfortable with these acts. Prove to yourself that your limiting beliefs die a quick death if you will simply do what you feel uncomfortable doing.” Darren Rowse
I think it was to renovate one of the rooms upstairs. The door needed some painting and the walls as well. I wanted to turn it into a nice guest room and instead of getting a professional to do it which would have cost a lot of money, I decided to give it a try. A “TRY” is the main word here since I had no experience doing what I was about to undertake.
I Googled and than YOUTUBED to get some knowledge on how and where to start with this project. It seemed liked a monster undertaking but I had time on my hands and ambition on my side or so I thought! The beginning went as planned. I got the “stuff” I needed and was pleased as punch with my progress. Then it went downhill from there! Nothing seemed to be going right and I was covered with paint from head to toe in no time at all! I had forgotten to put a plastic cover on the floor to protect the carpet so I had another mess going. Halfway through the day, I gave up! It was time to call in the people who knew what they were doing. An amateur was no match for this huge DIY project.
Long story short, the guys came in, took one look, laughed and got the job done in record time. I spent the next week trying to get the paint out of my hair, fingers, arms and everywhere else! Lesson learned and I kowtow to the people in the know. DIY is not for me, I am a klutz in more ways than one!
Daily writing prompt
Describe the most ambitious DIY project you’ve ever taken on.
“When you are your own best friend, you don’t endlessly seek out relationships, friendships, and validation from the wrong sources because you realize that the only approval and validation you need is your own.” Mandy Hale
How often have you looked to others for validation, to lift you up, to make you feel important, to give their approval and to make you feel loved? I know I have and found myself wallowing in self-pity or even questioning “me” as a person. I am learning that loving yourself comes first. YOU are important, what you tell yourself is important. Be kind and gentle here because the way you talk to yourself is important. Work on yourself, it is the key element to get you out of the rut. What rut? The stuck in the mud rut. Your goal is to get you moving to a better life and to feel comfortable with yourself.
Invest in Yourself
This may sound like a new concept because we spend a lot of our energy and money investing in materialistic things but in our rush to please ourselves, we forget the all-important person who is left wanting. Invest in time spent with yourself, this doesn’t take much but dedication. A walk in nature to nurture your soul, meditation to look inwards and find peace, working out to bolster your health or even spend time talking to yourself. If you have the means, pamper yourself. Go for a massage, get a facial, get a manicure or pedicure and no, it doesn’t mean you are vain. It just means you are putting yourself first and showing love to the person who matters the most and that is YOU.
Invest in your Environment
Your home is your castle? Work to make it that way. Spruce up your garden, plant flowers that give you joy when they bloom and fill your space with color. Redo your living area and or your bedroom and add things to make you feel comfortable. Make it a place you love spending time in and love coming back to but most of all, a place where you can relax and pamper your soul.
Get Rid of the Unwanted
This is hard. If you want to be your own best friend, you need to make space for the important things. Get rid of the things that bog you down, the people who make you question who you are because they are in a bad place in their lives. If their only goal in life is to bring you down to their level of despair, let them go! Sometimes getting rid of the unwanted makes room for what is needed. New friends, love, laughter, joy and peace.
Say this to yourself and mean it.
“You are hands down, my favorite person.” Unknown
Being your own best friend takes time as it is with everything that matters. Be forgiving, speak softly and lovingly to yourself, encourage yourself, love yourself and work towards looking in the mirror and loving the person staring back at you. Be your own validation and life will get easier.
How to be your own best friend:
“Look in the mirror and give yourself a high-five.
Ask yourself often, “how are you feeling?”
Cry when you need to.
Give yourself a hug.
Forgive yourself for going back to old patterns and behaviors.
Encourage yourself with words you would use to encourage a friend.” Unknown
Sometimes we need that duct tape over our mouths! There is not just one word but several that I would like to see permanently eradicated from usage simply because they do not add but detract from the English language as a whole.
Their use is easy to those who have a limited vocabulary and to those who think some of those words are “power words.” I detest the “F” word. Listening to someone using this word like confetti strewn throughout a sentence makes my skin crawl. I grew up in a household where cuss words, swear words and racial slurs were not allowed and if caught using them, there was hell to pay. A younger brother rebelled against such restrictions and the “F” word became his favorite word to get his disgust, anger or whatever else he was trying to get across. I heard him using it one day and told on him! Yes I was a tattle-tale but it was for his own good. Dad read him the riot act after hearing about it and we didn’t talk for a long time after. He did forgive me at a later point in time and I never heard him use it again or maybe not just around me!
If I have to cuss or use a swear word, I SPELL it out. It seems to take the sting out of it or so I think! A former boyfriend asked me, “Why can’t you just say the “F” word and be done with it?” My answer, “I can’t!” Fortunately, there are not many occasions where I’ve had to resort to such words and I can count them on one hand! Coming back to cuss words, George Washington once said:
“The foolish and wicked practice of profane cursing and swearing is a vice so mean and low that every person of sense and character detests and despises it.”
However, Mel Brooks had this to say: “I’ve been accused of vulgarity. I say that’s bulls**t.”
Two sides of the coin right there. I think eradicating such words especially of the hurtful nature such as racial slurs is a must but I can wish and hope and stand on my head and turn blue in the face but change will be a long time coming if ever!
Daily writing prompt
If you could permanently ban a word from general usage, which one would it be? Why?
A man who was previously a sailor, was very aware that ships are addressed as “she” and “her.” He often wondered what gender computers should be addressed. To answer that question, he set up two groups of computer experts. The first was comprised of women, and the second of men. Each group was asked to recommend whether computers should be referred to in the feminine gender, or the masculine gender. They were asked to give 4 reasons for their recommendation.
The group of women reported that computers should be referred to in the masculine gender because:
In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.
As soon as you commit to one, you realize that, if you had waited a little longer you could have had a better model.
The men on the other hand concluded that computers should be referred to in the feminine gender because:
No one but the Creator understands the internal logic.
The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.
Hmm….
Good one but incase you’re wondering computers are gender neutral.
A friend asked me recently, “What do you seek the most?” I couldn’t give him an answer right away. It was a troubling question to say the least. I thought I knew because I had been working on exactly this for months on end but now faced with a direct question and I had no answers or rather I was unsure. I wanted to say “love” but the word that jumped in was “peace.” More specifically, “inner peace.” I think without it nothing else matters. It all boils down to just living for the sake of living.
What is inner peace? According to http://www.calm.com, “Inner peace is a deep state of calm, acceptance and contentment. It means being in harmony with yourself, others, and the world around you. It’s not about eliminating challenges or difficulties but navigating through them with a tranquil and accepting mind.”
Do I have that kind of peace in my life? Truthfully, I’m not sure. I have a tendency to let things rattle me, unnerve me, shake me to the core and kick me off balance. I know I have stress and that is nothing new. Dealing with stress has always been an uphill battle but I’m doing better. However, I still have a long ways to go. The question then arose, how do I go about securing inner peace? The kind that gives me a deep state of calm and paints my world a beautiful shade of pink? The quote below might work.
“Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions.” Pema Chodron
Sounds simple enough but let me tell you, it’s a hard one for me. I let people control my feelings, emotions and my reactions and that is the first problem. I needed simpler solutions to a tough question so I decided to go looking and turns out I’ve been doing them already!
Breathe it says. Take time out in the day to just breathe and let go. I’m learning all kinds of breathing techniques and it is not just about taking a breath in and expelling it out. The experts have honed breathing to a new high. Breathing has gone high-tech but the original version still works. Try it for a slice of good old-fashioned peace.
Mindfulness is the other technique used to achieve inner peace. Live in the present, embrace it, let it unfold and do not control. Life knows exactly what to do. A really hard one for me as I wanted the answers yesterday!
Meditation is a gold mine and don’t I know it. My early morning and evening meditation practices have worked wonders in my life. I’m calmer, my reaction to unwanted challenges is slower and my mind seems quieter than it used to be. Worth a try if tranquil peace is what you’re searching for. It takes practice to calm that fidgety mind but time and patience will get you there. There is a plus, there is nothing more delicious than unadulterated inner peace.
Nature, connect with it and it will instill peace to the depths of your soul. Something as simple as a walk will take you there. Fresh air and nature’s beauty will clear your mind and you will get a different perspective on life looking at it through nature’s viewpoint. Everything has a time and place, do not rush that is the message.
Practicing gratefulness is a big one. I’ve started practicing this simple concept and my glass went from half empty to actually quite full. Do it often enough and you won’t be lacking anything at all! Too simple? I know. Given time this technique does work because it changes your mindset from negative to a more positive one and we all need that.
If none of the above methods work, do this instead.
“Learning to ignore things is one of the great paths to inner peace.” Robert J. Sawyer
Ever since that question was thrown in my direction, I’ve been thinking about the mindset for inner peace and I have come to the conclusion that all roads lead to “inner peace” first. If you want to have a life free from chaos, disarray and turmoil, work towards inner peace and all the other things will fall into place. Challenges are a part of life both big, small and the daily variety but you can overcome if you focus, work on clearing it and MOVE ON! Standing still in one place for too long would be a big mistake. The Gambler song gives us some tips on how to do exactly that.
If you’re gonna play the game, boy
You gotta learn to play it right.
You’ve got to know when to hold ’em
Know when to fold ’em
Know when to walk away
And know when to run….
Every gambler knows
That the secret to survivin’
Is knowing what to to throw away
And knowin’ what to keep
Those last three lines speak to the matter of inner peace.
Figure it out, have confidence in yourself and HAVE AN AMAZING DAY!
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