March 2025 – Site Title

ALL THAT BAGGAGE (Archives)

A soft reminder:

“not everything that weighs you down is yours to carry.” Unknown

I’m talking about emotional baggage, the kind that has gathered so much dust but we still carry them around like an albatross around our necks. Everyone has them but some find it easy to let go and to move on. Others lug it around because they love going back there for whatever the reason and than there are those who use it as a “get out of jail free card.” They whip it out as a talking point as to why they are stuck where they’re at and can’t see their way forward.

Most or all of the “emotional baggage” belongs in the past but unresolved issues, anger, sadness, grief or just plain, “I love living in the past” attitude puts it front and center and makes it very much a part of the present.

“Leave your baggage where it belongs. In the past. It has no place in your future.” Unknown

Things happen and oftentimes we have no control over it. It could be a break up or a painful event such as losing a loved one or even situations which cause anger, confusion and absolute disbelief. They happened and there is no changing the outcome but by carrying that baggage around like a well-worn trophy, it is not going to change what took place in the past. It happened and there is no going back. You can only move forwards.

“We all have baggage but there comes a time when you realize it’s time to UNPACK.” Unknown

Here are some examples of emotional baggage:

I’ll never be good enough.

I don’t deserve good things.

Everyone will leave me.

I am angry.

I will never forgive.

I can’t escape my past.

Nobody cares about me!

I hate my life!

I can’t move forward.

I failed.

This is as good as it gets.

Recognize any of them? I DO.

“Emotional baggage refers to “unfinished emotional issues, stressors, pain, and difficulties we’ve experienced that continue to take up space in our minds and affect our present relationships.” http://www.verywellmind.com

The truth is:

“Emotional baggage is heavy, and it’s way too expensive to keep dragging along to all the places that life wants to take you.” Unknown

No, it is not easy to get rid of emotional baggage because we keep filling it up every chance we get. It gets so full sometimes that I can’t zip it up for all the useless stuff that I fill it up with, mostly things that have happened and it is still there for all the reasons I have stated above. It’s time to refocus and discard what no longer serves you.

If you want to get rid of the ‘useless’ you need to do some work. According to http://www.griefworkcenter.com, “Identify what you have actually lost and grieve that which is gone, focus on your strengths that empower you; explore the tasks you need to complete to let go of the overwhelming feelings, and focus on how you have experienced growth because of what happened.”

I can hear one friend saying, “I CAN’T! It seems like only yesterday.” To that friend I say, “The truth is, it’s been more than 10 years. LET IT GO.” You don’t need that “get out of jail free card,” anymore, you have places to go.

AND

“Misery might love company but so does joy, and joy throws much better parties.” Billy Joey

Have an amazing day.

Three Things

I could go with more but I’m going to stick to what I think makes a person unique.

Honesty

I place a lot of importance on honesty. It is hard to find because people tend to lie like there is no tomorrow! However, without honesty it is hard to trust someone and honesty makes for a relationship where respect for the person comes into play in the form of honesty. You are unique if honesty is your stronghold.

Integrity

Without integrity there are no moral principles. Someone who does whatever he/she wants without moral principles is someone I try to avoid at all costs. A person with integrity has a strong moral code and tries to do the right thing and it is indeed a unique quality to have and to treasure.

Humility

I find this quality extremely attractive more than looks or stature in life. These people are usually very modest and do not think they are better than others. There is a certain kindness that shines through and they don’t mind getting their hands dirty. This is definitely a unique quality and one that is extremely attractive and makes the person stand out even more.

Now for my second cup of coffee!

Daily writing prompt

Which aspects do you think makes a person unique?

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Good Vibes (Archives)

“One small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.”

Dictionary.com defines good vibes as a “slang phrase for the positive feelings given off by a person, place or situation.” When good vibes are present you feel positive emotions or rather you radiate trust, love and kindness to those around you.

“A kind word, a genuine smile, and a warm gesture can send the best vibes.” Unknown

I can agree with the genuine smile part. Sharing smiles is a part of my DNA and if we share eye-contact, a smile is the first thing you’ll see before we even exchange a word. There is nothing wrong with sharing a smile with strangers. Who knows you might have changed their day for the better and it didn’t cost you anything to do so.

However, today ‘good vibes’ was the furthest thing on my mind. Something didn’t go quite right yesterday and it triggered an emotional response which filled me with agitation and that is putting it mildly. Afterwards, I wanted to make it right but I had to give it time so I tossed and turned all night and woke up with a big chip on my shoulder and not quite ready to blow it off. I have to keep moving to stop the overthinking I told myself. I put on my old sweats, the rattiest I could find to exaggerate how I was feeling, bundled my hair on my head and looking like a nightmare, I decided to do a thorough cleaning of the bedroom especially when I could see the dust bunnies grinning at me daring me to touch them. I got all the necessary stuff ready and a big bowl of water to wipe everything clean. Good vibes at this point was nowhere to be seen! Cleaning was and is not my favorite chore but it was one way to drown out my mind so I got ready to tackle the impossible. Just as I was getting ready to start, Chachi the cat walks in, takes one look at the big bowl of water and looks at me as if to say, “What’s the pool doing in the middle of the room mom?” That was enough to light up my eyes, put a smile on my face and to bring the good vibes rushing back in. Just an example of how little it takes to change the mood in an instant if only you’re ready and willing to let it.

“Let it go. Change the channel. Turn it off. Unsubscribe. Unfriend. Unfollow. Mute. Block. Walk away. Breathe.” Unknown

The day took off on a better note afterwards and I had a clean bedroom to boot. The problem was still there but it didn’t need to fill my whole day and neither did it have the power to destroy my mood, my day and my good vibes. Here are some rules, there are seven of them to help you to get your energy back, to bring oomph back into your life and more than that to put that smile back on your face. It did on mine.

7 RULES of LIFE

Make peace with your past so it won’t disturb your future.

What other people think of you is none of your business.

The person in charge of your happiness is you.

Don’t compare your life to others. Comparison is the thief of joy.

Time heals almost everything. Give it time.

Stop thinking so much. It’s alright not to know all the answers.

SMILE. You don’t own all the problems in the world.

So for today, GOOD VIBES ONLY!

Have an amazing day.

Tia’s Cheesecakes

It’s Sunday and I just woke up so coming up with something is a hard thing as I just had my first cup of coffee, it takes another cup to get going!

I went with the easiest thing and that is cheesecake. It is my nemesis as some of you already know since I have been posting about my addiction to this little bit of nothingness BUT it has a tremendous hold on me. I’ve been trying to beat the craving but it has been touch and go so far. Some days I do great and some days I indulge! Nothing too crazy but this addiction plays with my willpower and I hate it but love it at the same time!

A cheesecake named after me would be soft, creamy and melt in your mouth. Scrumptious would be another word for it. It would be plain but you can add whatever you want to it. Fruits, sprinkles, glazes or anything your heart desires, bottom line is that it tastes great all on its own with nothing added to glorify its taste. I want everyone to have the same effect it has on me and once you taste it there is no going back, you are done for hook, line, and sinker!

It’s Sunday, time for cheesecake? Just kidding. It’s a no cheesecake day today. Yes, it is smirking, the cheesecake I mean, but we shall see. I plan to win this battle one way or another!

Daily writing prompt

If you could have something named after you, what would it be?

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Let Go Gracefully (Archives)

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Just like that….it is over. The feelings and emotions crowding your mind and raging through your body are almost too much to bear. Disbelief, anger, sadness, numbness, confusion and rage could be some of the emotions taking hold and letting go gracefully is the last thing on your mind.

It is a normal reaction. Give it time to settle down even if it feels like it never will right now. It is done for, so let it go gracefully.

“The trees are about to show us how lovely it is to let the dead things go.” Unknown

It is not easy to let go and it is downright scary. Suddenly it becomes real and very uncomfortable. Most of us look at it as a relationship ending and there is a mad scramble within to want to save what can’t be saved. What went wrong is the first question that comes to mind. The more pertinent question is, does it even matter? Crying over split milk is a lost cause and venting over lost time and energy even more so. Consider it a sunk cost and take steps to move on.

Did I neglect his needs, wants and feelings?

Did he neglect mine?

What led to the breakup?

Did he fall into me or was I the one doing the chasing running circles around him?

Did he hurt me intentionally? There is a difference between hurting someone and hurting someone intentionally. The latter is done with total disrespect knowing full well that the action taken will have repercussions and not of the nice kind.

More importantly, how much of what I didn’t want, did I tolerate?

The answers coming back could be eye-openers because, as women, we tend to have blinders on when it comes to love and relationships. What we wouldn’t tolerate normally are the very things we are quick to disregard when it comes to that special person in our life.

“Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.” Unknown

Letting go is a grieving process. You’ll have to go through the grieving to get to the other side. There are five steps to the process. They are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. There is a quote that goes like this:

“The buffalo is the only animal that runs into a storm rather than away from it.”

Why? It’s because, “they instinctively know that walking into a storm will get them out of the weather quicker, despite knowing they’ll suffer more up front.” Face your problems head-on with courage and determination and by spending time there instead of ignoring them you will be able to move past them more quickly and effectively.

However, if you don’t want to do all five of the grieving techniques, accept what has happened, don’t ponder too much on why it happened but know that sometimes:

“Not all storms come to disrupt your life. Some come to clear your path.” Unknown

AND

“Some things break your heart but fix your vision.” Unknown

Let go gracefully and walk away with your dignity intact. Smile even if it hurts and turn the switch off. It is done for now and you’ll be fine.

Have an amazing day.

What Makes Me Laugh?

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I would say a lot of things. I look for laughter everyday and it is an effort that I take seriously. It has been said, “laughter is the best medicine,” and I totally agree. A day without laughter in my world is like a day without sunshine. It is tinged with grey and something seems to be sorely lacking.

Seeking laughter is in my daily to-do list. Stand-up comedy is a good source. I love Max Amini and his brand of comedy. He always has me laughing and if that gets boring, I watch comedies which definitely does the trick and puts a sunshiny spin on my mood. Then there is the abundant supply of jokes out there that tickles my funny bone and I have posted some of them here. Not always funny to some but it is to me and that matters.

My most important laughter maker and stress buster is Chachi, the cat, aka Little Einstein. Not a day goes by without laughter from that angle. He doesn’t even have to do anything, just standing there with his front paws crossed has me breaking out in laughter. There is just something about the little guy that brings smiles and laughter in my direction. Perhaps it is called love, the unconditional kind. Whatever it is, I have found my perpetual source of laughter and it is of the happiness kind. He instigates it sometimes unknowingly but it does the trick and most days I wear a smile on my face having indulged in rip-roaring laughter. Laughter is there to be harvested if you just pay attention and decide to give it a chance. Try it, it is a beautiful thing and it gives stress a boot out the door!

Daily writing prompt

What makes you laugh?

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Pete Hegseth (Archives)

Update:

Nothing much has changed. Hegseth is in the eye of the storm and many are calling for his resignation and rightfully so. He was unqualified for the job of Defense Secretary and still is and add incompetence and downright arrogance and you’ve got the answer as to why he should resign.

Secretary of Defense, Pete Hegseth, was sworn into his new role by Vice President JD Vance on January 18th.

“When President Trump chose me for this position, the primary charge he gave me was to bring the warrior culture back to the Department of Defense.” Was it missing? The warrior culture I mean.

He further added, “He, like me, wants a Pentagon laser-focused on lethality, meritocracy, warfighting, accountability and readiness.” He also said, “this is the most important deployment of my life.”

All fine and good. Let’s take a good hard look at the 29th secretary of defense. First of all, he is the least qualified person to ever serve in this position. However, he has two things going for him according to Michael J. Hicks, an Opinion Contributor with USA Today.

“First he doesn’t give a whit about our Constitution. Indeed, he seems eager to fire generals based solely on their willingness to obey the legal orders of the reelected president.”

Hmm….

One of the two characteristics that make him a perfect candidate to serve under Trump.

Second, “Hegseth’s private life provides close parallels to those of the 47th president. Hegseth has cheated on at least two of his three wives, divorcing two.”

By the way, is the President aware that Hegseth once claimed on national TV that he hasn’t washed his hands for 10 years because, “germs are not a real thing. I can’t see them; therefore they’re not real.” He later claimed it was much ado about nothing. So, what does the 47th president and self-professed germophobe think about this and more importantly did they shake hands? He’s good-looking so germs don’t matter that much right?

Let’s look at Pete Hegseth’s tattoos. The man has multiple tattoos and two of them are often associated with extremist groups. The chest tattoo of the Jerusalem cross and an arm tattoo of the Latin phrase, “Deus Vult,” meaning “God Wills it.” Hegseth gave pushback saying, “I don’t give a damn – but this type of targeting of Christians, conservatives, patriots and everyday Americans will stop on DAY ONE at (Trump’s) DoD.”

It did but for targeting immigrants with tattoos. Trump thinks immigrants with tattoos are all criminals. What’s good for the goose is also good for the gander? Not in this administration.

If you kowtow to the “new Messiah” all things are possible is the message. Tattoos, sexual assault charges and no qualifications don’t matter. If you do the bidding, you’ve got it made!

Big Dreams at Five?

Seriously? I was a dreamer at five years of age as I think most young children are. School was looming in the horizon somewhere and I had nothing pressing on my agenda. It was time to be a young girl with her head in the clouds and her mind drumming up a fantasy world filled with little people, mushrooms hiding creatures that spoke and a world where the animals had a voice.

My biggest role at the time was that of a fairy complete with a magic wand! I walked around making stories up in my head and I had a relationship going but only with the ducks, rabbits and whatever else I came into contact with. Ambition was nowhere to be seen but I didn’t know it at the time but those forays into the fantasy world would become the stepping stone into the world of writing. I currently write children’s books and I give animals a voice so nothing much has changed in that respect!

Coming back to your question, five was a time for dreaming, playing with my thoughts which was just taking shape and other than that, it was a fantastic world of make-believe and unimaginable fun!

Daily writing prompt

When you were five, what did you want to be when you grew up?

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Gaggle of Fools

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“Common sense is a flower that doesn’t grow in everyone’s garden.” Unknown

Trump is calling the Signal breach debacle a ‘witch hunt’ and Defense Secretary, Pete Hegseth, is standing on his head and denying that the Signal chat messages contained any classified materials. However, The Atlantic published those messages on Wednesday and it was clear to everyone whether you’re an expert on operational security or not, that a massive breach of sensitive information had taken place. The Trump regime is sticking to wordplay. More specifically, “Attack plans vs. War plans.” Does it matter? According to them, it does.

Instead of taking accountability and trying to correct a mistake, they are thumping their chests and blowing smoke in every direction. However, the truth remains. One source had this to say, “We don’t provide that level of information on unclassified systems, in order to protect the lives and safety of the servicemembers carrying out these strikes. If we did, it would be wholly irresponsible. My most junior analysts know not to do this.”

The Defence Secretary should have known this if he had been qualified. Therein lies the truth of the matter.

“Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side.” Unknown

Breathing In Life

It’s interesting how everything comes back to this one thing and that is breathing. We pay it very little mind as we rush through life and forget that it exists but only as something we take for granted. It is that motion of taking in a breath and letting it out that tells us we are alive but how are we breathing? Has stress made your breathing harder, has anger stopped it in its tracks or has sadness made it shallow and rhythmless? Probably all of those things and more. Yet, if we stopped breathing than life would come to a standstill.

I found some beautiful quotes that gets you thinking about this thoughtless process we call breathing. It speaks to just how beautiful and essential it is to breathe and to pay attention to the kind of breathing we are doing.

“Life is amazing. And then it’s awful. And then it’s amazing again. And in between the amazing and the awful its ordinary and mundane and routine. Breathe in the amazing, hold on through the awful, and relax and exhale through the awful, and relax and exhale during the ordinary. That’s just living, heartbreaking, soul-healing, amazing, awful, ordinary life. And it’s breathtakingly beautiful.” LR Knost

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“Stop your worrying, panicking and stressing.

BREATHE.

Remember, you made it this far through difficulties that seemed impossible. Remember how many times you were saved at the very last minute – this time is no different.” Bryant McGill

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“You don’t always need a plan. Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go, and see what happens.” Mandy Hale

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“As you waste your breath complaining about life, someone out there is breathing their last breath.” Appreciate what you have.” Unknown

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“Life isn’t measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.” Unknown

Did something or someone take your breath away today? The Magnolia tree out back took my breath away this morning. It is getting ready to bloom and soon it will be a showpiece as it is every year and it will be enough to take your breath away. The daffodils are shaking their yellow heads, their beauty simple but breathtaking. Most of all, the lone deer that ran through the fields this morning was mesmerizing and breathtaking as I stood and watched it do its spring dance of happiness. I got my daily dose of breathtaking moments today but I’m sure there will be more tomorrow, I just need to appreciate what’s in front of me.

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“Sometimes you need to slow down, remain calm, and simply let life happen. Take a deep breath and focus on the simple important things: you are alive, you are breathing, you are enough as you are.” Unknown

YOU GOT THIS.

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“Listen, are you breathing just a little and calling it a life?” Mary Oliver

Words to pay attention to. We deserve better don’t you think?

Have an amazing day.