If there is one positive change I have made in my life then it is that I don’t let outside events control how I react to things. It used to be that if something didn’t go my way or if something turned out bad or if a relationship didn’t work out for whatever the reason, I would play it around in my head until it became a monster problem and it was able to wreck my days for weeks on end.
Those days are over with. These days I look at the problem and come with workable solutions. It may take days before I get a handle on it but I don’t let it, whatever it is, get the better of me. I am at a point where I am getting clarity as to what I want and what doesn’t work for me. I am also taking the attitude that if something doesn’t work, it is alright. There will be other opportunities to make it better and this attitude is working in my favor. Gone are the days of taking everything and shredding it to pieces and looking for the answers within that scope. My thinking has evolved and I am much stronger but I also realize that things will always happen, it is life, but I don’t have to take it for a ride each time it happens. I am calmer, more at peace and there is a sense of achievement there.
Daily writing prompt
Describe one positive change you have made in your life.
It’s not enough that he has tanked the economy and blown up the WTO system of global growth and stability. The man who loves jumping at anything he sees as a money making scheme is off and running to another debacle, one which is more to his liking.
Rumor has it that he wants a military parade for his birthday. Nothing new here, he has been hinting at it ever since he attended one in Paris for Bastille Day in 2017. If it takes place at all, it would fall on his birthday which is Saturday, June 14 and coincidentally it just so happens to be the 250th anniversary of the U.S. Army. It is rumored that the Trump administration is “reportedly looking to add a parade that would stretch nearly four miles, from the Pentagon in Arlington, Virginia, across the Potomac River, into D.C. How about Hegseth leading the charge, bare-chested and flaunting his tattoos and wearing the Amerian flag? Patriotic enough? Let’s not forget Musk doing the Nazi salute and Trump grinning from ear to ear.
The cost of such a parade would be phenomenal but didn’t he say they’ve got 2 billion coming in each day from tariffs alone? Should be enough to cover the cost don’t you think?
Global economies are hanging in the balance and a full-blown Trade War is looming and hissing at the fringes so what’s missing? Let’s add a military parade to the mix why don’t we? One that proclaims America’s might as a superpower with a message that says, “Don’t fool with us!” Remind you of anything?
“There are so many scams on the internet now a days.
Send me $19.95 and I will tell you how to avoid them.” Unknown
I’ve been dealing with scam calls, scam dating invites and yesterday it came in the form of a message supposedly from my bank about a problem. The problem was it wasn’t even my bank! I deleted the message.
It seems to be a thriving business this scam thing and they are getting cleverer by the minute. Messages asking for money comes in the form of sorry stories such as they are somewhere and can’t access their money or someone close to them is very sick and they need cash urgently. One message took the cake. He claimed his daughter had been on vacation in Africa when she was captured by a tribe and held captive there. The release would require a certain amount of money.
The only thing these losers want is to make you part with your hard-earned money and unfortunately they are finding better and better ways of doing it and that is the scary part!
SIGNS OF A ROMANCE SCAMMER
Professes love quickly. Claims to be from the U.S., but is overseas for business or military service.
Asks for money, and lures you off the dating site.
Claims to need money – for emergencies, hospital bills, or travel.
Plans to visit, but can’t because of an emergency.
There are many varieties of scammers. Last week, I received a call about my book. The caller offered me a slot on a radio show or was it on TV, anyway it would take place in the form of an interview with a celebrity host plugging my book. The catch, payment was required! A few days later, a very sweet voice (they usually are) on the other end offered a film deal! When I asked for which book, she stammered and quickly turned the conversation to how great it would be to see my book on screen. Of course it would be, however, scammers beware, I’ve got your number and here’s my message to you.
By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you….blocked and deleted.
How often have you used the words above to describe the “deja vu” feeling of having experienced the exact same event or incident over and over again with the very same and often painful outcomes? I know I have and I’m sure many of you have. So why do we keep repeating the same cycle over and over again? Perhaps, it’s because of this.
“Been there, done that. Then, been there several more times, because apparently I never learn.” Unknown
I’ve done this many times over. This meaning, “I told myself I would never go through this and find myself in the same uneventful place again.” Like dating the wrong person with the exact same habits as the one I left behind. Then I find myself months down the road faced with the exact same situation but with another individual. I told myself I would never do cheaters, liars, control freaks and narcissists ever again but lo and behold, it never fails. They seem to come out of the woodwork as far as I am concerned and I am faced with the self-same situation only to scream, “What am I doing wrong?”
I think we are creatures of habit and therefore love embracing familiarity more than commonsense! What feels familiar is comforting. It gives us a sense of warmth and maybe even a feeling of “home.” You’ve heard the saying, “Home is where the heart is?” Well, not in this case! According to Isabel Buchbinder, “repeating patterns do not happen by coincidence. Repeating patterns are merely lessons which can be seen as an opportunity for us to evolve and grow.” The question remains, how often do you have to fall in order to grasp the lessons you have to learn? Unfortunately, there are no clear-cut answers. Some learn quickly and others not at all. I hope I am NOT in the “not at all” category but it sure feels that way at times.
Here again, Ms. Buchbinder has some good tips on how to break free and to move on to greener and more acceptable behavior traits. She says, “the reoccuring external situation is trying to get our attention so that we focus within and change this internal limiting structure and thus break the pattern. She adds, “don’t bleed on those who didn’t hurt you.” It just means heal yourself first before entering a relationship. This also means, “once you heal your subconscious limitations and traumas, you no longer repeat patterns and you will start attracting life situations which are more suitable for your well-being and more heightened state of life!”
“Life will keep on repeating the same situation through different circumstances until we have learnt the lesson.” Isabel
How do you break this self-fulfilling prophecy? Here are five steps from Isabel, not easy but worth the try.
The first step is to become aware of the pattern.
The second step is to observe the situation but don’t react.
The third step is to identify the lesson it is trying to teach us.
The fourth and perhaps the hardest step is to accept the situation, integrate, heal and let it go. Letting go takes forever in my world and even when I do, I keep looking back with one foot in the past and one foot in front.
The fifth step, if you’re confronted with a “repeating pattern” again, it’s just life wanting to know if you’ve learned the lesson and have fully let go. Lord, have mercy!
Be gentle with yourself, accept what you can’t change, learn from what you can and take the next step in the right direction. If you find yourself faced with the same old stuff from another individual but in a different body, don’t walk but RUN! and don’t look back.
“Break through that imaginary ceiling you’ve placed over yourself.” Unknown
AND
“Life has a way of making you repeat the same patterns until YOU choose to break the cycle.”
I think anything is fun if you enjoy doing it. I love walking and I walk almost everyday and what makes it fun is that I am surrounded by nature which is an added bonus. I am not only getting fit but I find peace and calm while I’m doing it.
Yoga is another go to method of getting fit. I can do this beautiful fitness routine in the privacy of my home and that makes it fun. Chachi, the cat, joins me most days and sometimes doing the Downward Dog pose gets challenging with him running in and out and some days I burst out laughing and we wind up cuddling. I think that was his goal all along. 😉
Cardio and weight training is a must. I say a “must” because in my mind it is. I am a fitness fanatic and I workout seven days a week. I’ve been told to back off and take a break but it goes in one ear and out the other. Workouts keep me energized and those cheesecakes I keep talking about don’t have a chance of adding a pound or two meaning I am where I should be weight-wise but it takes effort and focus to keep it going day in and day out.
I love working out so whatever I do to keep fit is fun and I don’t need props or anything else to make it fun. However, I love having Little Chachi as my trainer or rather he thinks he is. Some days he sits on the bed and watches me and when there is a break, I reach over and plant kisses on his forehead and that is his reward for staying out of my way. He loves it and it makes working out fun.
The journey is complete and a new chapter has started. Life is no longer what you used to know. It is no longer about staying up late, doing what you want and whenever you want it. It is now about getting up and showing up for work. Responsibility and accountability are not to be taken lightly and you will have to learn to adjust again. “I have zero life now,” is not going to do it. You are an adult and you will have to do adult things. We all had to and I know that through the complaining a new person will emerge, one fully capable of handling anything, of this I am sure.
“Every worthwhile accomplishment, big or little, has its stages of drudgery and triumph: a beginning, a struggle and a victory.” Mahatma Gandhi
I remember the beginning well. It seems like only yesterday when you made it through high school and the next step was looming large. I wasn’t ready to let you go, not then and not ever! When I looked at you, I didn’t see the young man who had graduated from high school, all I saw was the little boy I had coached through life.
You, on the other hand, were ready to spread your wings. You wanted freedom and so the search for the right university began. I didn’t know at the time that it would take you far away from me. I felt fear clutching at my heart but I had to let you go whether I wanted to or not. You were leaving and there was nothing I could do about it. You found the perfect university, than you got an apartment and the move began. I hugged you goodbye and watched you leave with tears in my eyes.
Law was your first choice but that would change a year down the road. Drinking, partying and staying out late was part and parcel of college life. The struggle started when you got your jaw broke coming home late one night in a botched robbery attempt. You landed in hospital and I was shocked but you decided to stay where you were at and I had to let you go thinking it could have been worse. You could have lost your life had there been a weapon involved.
However, the psychological effects of that attack were plenty. You turned from a sweet and innocent boy into an angry young man. Studying and keeping your grades up was the last thing on your mind. You wanted revenge but there was none to be had. You learned that life is not always fair and some times the good guys DO get hurt. Letting go and moving on came slowly but it did come and I learned that your survival and overcoming the attack would depend on how we handled you. Your strength would come from your ability to stand back up and from knowing that we were standing with you every step of the way. It was a long and slow recovery but you did it.
You are now standing on the cusp of achieving what you began five years ago. Soon you will have your degree with a better than average grade under your belt. I heard the pride in your voice as you told me your grade two days ago but you didn’t see the tears running down my face. It has been a long journey for all of us but this is not the end.
“A great accomplishment shouldn’t be the end of the road, just the starting point for the next leap forward.” Harvey Mackay
Victory took a long time coming but you, my son, have made me proud. You’ll be moving again and this time around you’ll be working towards standing on your own two feet.
“Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment.” Thomas Carlyle
CONGRATULATIONS! You are on your way and I couldn’t be prouder. Just one last word, I still see you as that little boy whose hands I held as we walked to and back from kindergarten but then again I guess I always will.
A child asked his father, “How were people born?” So his father said, “Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on.”
The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, “We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now.”
The child ran back to his father and said, “You lied to me!” His father replied, “No, your mom was talking about her side of the family.”
Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him, “Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!”
The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back to the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
A woman was taking an afternoon nap. When she woke up, she told her husband, “I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace. What do you think it means?”
“You’ll know tonight,” he said. That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it to find a book entitled, “The Meaning of Dreams.”
According to Colleen McCullough, “the thorn bird spends its entire life tirelessly searching for a thorn tree. Once the tree is located, the thorn bird impales itself on its thorns and sings a beautiful song as it dies,” and it will be the first and only time the thorn bird will sing.
This is a book that kept me riveted to the very end. I’ve read it three times now and I know everything there is to know about it. It is one of the greatest novels of our time and McCullough does a magnificent job of taking us through a journey of forbidden love but most of all it is about a young girl who refuses to give up her dream of being with the wrong guy and the saga that ensues.
Four-year-old Meggie meets Father Ralph and the wheels of destiny starts turning. He is much older than her and a priest at that but there is an instant connection. Father Ralph faces a losing battle as he tries to steer away from her but she is like a beacon that keeps beckoning. The relationship and conflict will take you on a journey, one that will have you rooting for them. I did. It is a heart-rending story which will also keep you spellbound to the very end.
It is definitely a good read if you are into romance and into the kind that will have your tears flowing. I’m a romantic at heart and if a story grips my heart, I’m all in. This one did and I would definitely read it again!
“I’ve learned over and over that life happens on its own terms, not mine.” Kate Walsh
Ms. Walsh is absolutely right in that respect. Life happens as it happens and most times you have no control over it whatsoever. What fun is there in having a crystal ball to show you everything before it comes knocking on your door right? Well, I for one think it might just make life a tad easier but no luck there. Life happens and you’ll just have to deal with whatever comes your way whether you want to or not.
“Life happens,” is an idiom used to express that there are things we can’t control, foresee or prepare for. The future is unknown, and anything could happen.
According to Sarah Pierson of Huffingtonpost, here are some tips on how to make life happen instead of just letting it happen to you.
Create a timeline of the things you most want to experience or accomplish. Basically have some goals and go out and get them done.
Take risks. I’m not a risk taker so this is hard for me. However, taking risks is the way to go according to Ms. Pearson. You need to get yourself out there in order to overcome the fears of facing life head-on.
Invest in people. Investing your time in people is well worth the effort it seems because the rewards are plenty. It is time well-spent, cuts back on loneliness and it gets you out there in this great big world of ours.
Learn to let go of that which you cannot control and to adapt. This is another hard one for me. Letting go has never been my forte and adapting, well, that’s right up there with one of the hardest things to do! I am willing to give it a go.
Seek advice from those who are living life fully. This is a good one. Learning by example is never a bad idea.
Travel
Learn not to compare. If you’re always comparing yourself to someone who has more than you, who looks better than you or someone who just seems to have it altogether, you’ll never get a handle on your own life because you’ll always be hoping and wishing instead of bringing the focus back to you and that is where it needs to be to move forward.
“Be available for life to happen.” Bill Murray
In order for life to happen, you’ve got to start making life happen. If it’s a job you want, make a plan. It’s not going to fall into your lap, you’ve got to move to make it happen. Read up on the best interview strategies. Find out how you can hone your skills to come across as the best candidate for the job. Spruce up your appearance, those old ratty pair of jeans that have seen better days and those worn-out t-shirts will have to go. Invest in some good clothes. It matters. Finding a job in this fast-paced and dog eat dog world is never easy and daunting to say the least but with hard work, dedication and effort, you can land the job of your dreams. Never give up and you are almost a winner!
If it’s a relationship you want, get rid of the no gooders. Period. If they don’t contribute to your life, get rid of them. If you’re looking for that perfect someone, it starts with you. Do your homework and find out what it is that you want. There is no such thing as ‘perfect’ but you’ll get pretty close if you’re willing to settle for mutual respect, love and honesty. The rest will fall in place.
If it’s happiness you’re looking for, you’ll have to do the work here as well. Nothing is ever handed to you on a silver platter. Know what makes YOU happy and go out and find it. Easier said than done? Well, yes but there is no other way unfortunately.
“Life happens to all of us. It’s not what happens to us, but how we respond to what happens to us that really decides if we’re going to be victims or if we’re going to get and have everything we’ve ever dreamed of.” Eric Thomas
Finally, get to know yourself. Spend time with yourself to find out what it is that you want. If it’s one or all of the things mentioned above but you don’t know where to start, have no fear because you are fully capable of figuring it out. You know what makes you tick, what makes you happy so don’t just let life happen, make it happen the way you want it. If it scares you, you’re not alone. Join the club!
“No matter what happens, you can get through the day. Inhale. Focus on the word, ‘relax.’ Exhale. Say, ‘I can do this! And then do it.” Ace Antonio Hall
I would choose her because I think we have many similarities. If you don’t know who she is, she is the second daughter in Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice. Someone told me not too long ago that I reminded him of her simply because she is set in her ways like I am or as he put it, COMPLICATED.
However, there is more to her than meets the eye. One of the things I admire about her is that she didn’t let societal pressure sway her and since I am stronger now than I used to be, I don’t let anything or anyone sway me as well. I am my own person, not a good thing always but I find it to be a good thing.
She expresses herself with wit and humor and I think I tend to do that. I have this funny bone that shows up more often than not. The problem is I tend to break out in laughter when I am by myself and when I see humor in a certain situation I burst out laughing. Chachi, the cat, thinks I’m crazy but he loves me regardless. The negative aspect of this character is that she forms opinions quickly and that is a death sentence for any relationship. It is the same with me. A new relationship is on shaky ground from the get go and I shut it down without batting an eye if I see red flags. Elizabeth also has a strong sense of morality and integrity and so do I. However, those two things do bring their own brand of problems because some say I am a stick in the mud but I stick to who I am and that too is a problem. You will see Elizabeth developing her character throughout the novel learning to understand how love and relationships work and she finally finds happiness with Mr. Darcy while I am still looking for him! At this rate, I don’t think he is going to show up.
Daily writing prompt
If you could be a character from a book or film, who would you be? Why?
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