There are problem makers and then there are problem makers.
“Avoid people who mess with your head. Avoid people who intentionally and repeatedly do and say things that they know upset you. Avoid people who expect you to prioritize them but refuse to prioritize you. Avoid people who can’t and won’t apologize sincerely. AVOID. AVOID. AVOID.” Unknown
AND
“There are some people who always seem angry and continuously look for conflict. Walk away the battle they are fighting isn’t with you, it is with themselves.” Unknown
I’ve met some of those people along the way and they are the people problem makers. However, there is another kind of problem making that is much more incendiary and if allowed to, it has the power to drive you insane at times and at other times, you wonder if you’re coming or going. I’m talking about the “what if” scenarios that we are so capable of creating in our minds. The destructive kind.
“What ifs” have the potential to bring you down if used too often. It leads to heightened anxiety, it appears replaying unwanted scenarios in your head and it is known to erode self-confidence and it brings about self-doubt.
“What” and “if” are two words as non-threatening as words can be. But put them together side-by-side and they have the power to haunt you for the rest of your life.” Unknown
What if? What if? What if?
“Change your what ifs to even ifs and stop giving power to worry.” Mya Ramirez.
I had a heart-to-heart with someone close yesterday and the conversation centered around all the “what ifs.” What if things go wrong?” What if the outcome is not what I want?” “What if changes are coming?” You guessed it, those questions were all coming from my side. He listened quietly and asked, “Why are you so afraid and WHY are you having all these checkups done? Whatever comes, it comes.” He has this que sera sera attitude about life and whatever comes his way, he lets it roll over like water over a duck’s back. He seems to be living a worry-free life with that attitude of his. I, on the other hand, jump at every problem and let it take me for a ride for as long as it wants to. The end result, total exhaustion and a frazzled mind.
The talk did some good. It made me step back from my doomsday, “What if” scenarios and to take a good hard look at my problem and to come up with some positive solutions. One of those solutions is not to jump the gun. My worries will not change a thing but my efforts at doing what is necessary to minimize the damage may put a positive spin on the whole thing.
“The what-if’s and the should-have’s will eat your brain.” John O’Callaghan
And if by chance the same old question creeps around, this next quote might just help.
Do you know? Do you know where your next destination is? Do you have a plan in mind? Or are you thinking, I’ll take whatever comes my way? Here’s the problem.
“If you don’t know where you are going, any road will get you there.” Lewis Carroll
Is that where you want to go? Just anywhere? I think you want better just as I do. Any road is not going to take me to where I want to go. I want better, I want better than what I left behind and I KNOW where I want to go. Having a destination matters and even if it’s not clear as it should be, having a plan, albeit a vague one, helps you to get moving towards your goal.
“If you don’t know where you’re going, how are you going to get there.” Unknown
Good question but often we are caught between the past and the future. We have one foot in yesterday, or maybe for some of us both feet back there, and we’re pretending like we’re moving on when in actuality we are staying put where we are, holding on to the memories and mistakes of yesterday. You can’t move on when you keep looking at that closed door. It’s not going to open and if by chance it does open, it will bring more of the same because it hasn’t changed but it has the power to hold you captive for a long, long time.
“Each season of your life is here to help you write a different part of your story. Stop living inside past chapters.
You’ve learned lessons and you’re better for them. Honor where you are and soak up everything this season has to offer you.” Unknown
Each season has something to offer but you’ve got to keep moving to find out what is waiting for you in the next one. So, where are you headed today? Are headed somewhere nice or are your feet moving forward but you’re eyes are trained back to where you came from? Letting go is not as simple as it seems. You can say, “I let go,” but really doing it is another thing altogether. Been there, done that, and still doing it! Only you can do the act of “letting go” and only you know when the right time is for you. Don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise. They are not walking in your shoes. Take your time but do it. Moving forward and letting go of the past requires that one monumental step, that of closing the chapter behind you.
“Keep going, because the best is yet to come.
Keep going, because you’re stronger than you think you are.
Keep going, because every step forward brings you one step closer to your goals.
Keep going, because you deserve to see what happens when all of your hard work pays off.”
Have an amazing day, breathe and keep moving forward.
These quotes below hold a lot of truth and wisdom in them. It might help to change your life for the better as it is doing mine.
“I don’t regret the things I’ve done, I regret the things I didn’t do when I had the chance.”
“When the past calls, let it go to voicemail, believe me, it has nothing new to say.”
“Death isn’t sad. The sad thing is most people don’t live at all.”
“I am always doing things I can’t do. That is how I get to do them.”
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.”
Envy and jealousy are two things that rob you of potential because you are too busy looking at someone else when you should be concentrating on your own life.
“It doesn’t matter where you are, you are nowhere compared to where you can go.”
“The more you take responsibility for your past and present, the more you are able to create the future you seek.”
“Success is 90% attitude and 1% aptitude.”
“Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.”
Paulo Coelho de Souze is a Brazilian lyricist and novelist. His book, “The Alchemist” was on the New York Times bestseller list for over 40o weeks and he is brilliant at getting across what life is all about and how to deal with it. I’ve posted some of his quotes here before but here are some more to whet the appetite.
“Life has a way of testing a persons will, either by having nothing happen at all or by having everything happen all at once.”
That’s because “life” is thinking let’s shake things up! It is getting too BORING!
“If you’re brave enough to say ‘GOODBYE’ life will reward you with a new ‘HELLO’.
I’ve been brave many times over and I’m still waiting for the hellos or it could be I say goodbyes more often than the hellos coming in and it has a hard time keeping up!
“The simple things are also the most extraordinary things, and only the wise can see them.”
I absolutely agree on this one.
“Things do not always happen the way I would have wanted, and it’s best that I get used to it.”
This is a hard one. I want things to happen the way I WANT IT for a change.
“It is always important to know when something has reached its end. Closing circles, shutting doors, finishing chapters, it doesn’t matter what we call it; what matters is to leave in the past those moments in life that are over.”
I am learning to leave things in the past BUT the past keeps calling me and I oblige! That is the problem in a nutshell.
“Sometimes you have to travel a long way to find what is near.”
That is human nature. Complicated is what it is about and I can attest to it whole-heartedly.
“And when you can’t go back, you have to worry only about the best way of moving forward.”
Small steps forward and you will get to your next destination. I hope it’s a good one.
“Life always waits for some crisis to occur before revealing itself at its most brilliant.”
Oh God, I don’t know about this one. If that is what life does, I am sunk!
And finally this:
“When a woman has not had SEX for a long time, She turns…..”
Turns into what?!! Becomes wiser? I can agree with that and a little weird? I can agree with that too. This one left me hanging!
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