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Paradise!

I love everything or almost everything about where I live. It is like living in a place where time stood still and the “old ways” are still present. The place is green, lush, and pristine at times.

The quiet is contagious and fills your whole being. I’ve lived in places where the hustle and bustle of city life was a constant. Along with it came the noise and “thinking” the kind you do and need for writing was next to impossible. Here, it is the perfect place to get your creative juices flowing and as I sit here at my computer, it faces the big window and outside there is a tall willow tree its branches softly dancing in the breeze. The sun is shining and NOT a sound can be heard! It is pure magic.

I’ve written about the fields where I wander and it takes me places. A muddled mind filled with thoughts that don’t need to be there are wiped away as I set foot on that almost sacred space. The mountains in the distance are often shrouded in haze but they are there silently watching. The open fields against a blue sky is beautiful and the seasonal plants and trees never fail to show up on time. It’s almost like they are cued to take off when the right time comes. No work on your part is needed. The pond in the woods is beautiful and it is where the herons come to roost. In spring, the slender streams criss -crossing the forest area put on a spectacular display of daffodils all along the way. In winter, it is bare but the beauty still remains but in a subdued way.

The sleepy little village doesn’t have much to offer but if you dive deeper there is more than enough to boggle the mind. The old architecture, the beautifully manicured and well-kept graveyard, the churches with their tiny pews, and the tiny little shops, they call them convenience stores here, all go to make up a place that is carved out of history but no matter how old it gets, the beauty of a place steeped in folklore and quiet elegance still remains.

I am grateful for this place and I call it home now. I love the symphony of the birds in the trees as dawn approaches and the late evening songs as they announce the end of another wonderful day. I love the horses that sometimes walk the cobblestone streets and I LOVE the beautifully kept gardens and how the people, especially the old folks who spend most of their summer days tending their gardens with such care and love and even if their backs are bent with age, those gardens keep them going. It is something to do and it is clear that they live for those days in the sun where planting and harvesting becomes important. When winter rolls around, they go indoors and take a well-deserved rest.

I am fully blessed! I love everything about this place and I can’t see myself going back to where life was a constant mad dash and my mind was filled with the unnecessary. I hope that never happens.

Daily writing prompt

What do you love about where you live?

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Your Choice

Happiness is a choice although some may disagree. I feel that it starts from within and works its way out. It is going to take work as with everything else in life that is worth having.

“Happiness is a choice. You can choose to be happy. There’s going to be stress in life, but it’s your choice whether you let it affect you or not.”

Valerie Bertinelli.

If you’re looking at outside factors to validate your existence, if you’re waiting for people to give you what you need to be happy, you’ll be sorely disappointed. Happiness is a choice you make and therein lies the secret of being happy.

It has been said that, “true happiness isn’t a destination, but a way of living….cultivated through intentional practices.” What do you need to be happy? Money? Love? Freedom? Peace? The answer is that it takes all of those things and more. However, there are some key secrets to leading a happy life. They are, “prioritizing positive relationships, practicing gratitude, engaging in meaningful activities, and managing stress effectively.”

These are all good and positive ways you can achieve happiness and to keep it there for a while. However, it is not a switch that you turn on and off. If you want the long-lasting kind of “happiness” you need to make positive choices that help to foster dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and andorphins, the happy hormones. It is something you need to work towards and things like developing resilience, setting intentions and making good choices help to influence “your emotional state and overall well-being.”

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.” Dalai Lama

It takes time to cultivate. Daily habits of the positive nature help to get you there. Being kind to yourself helps to strengthen that happiness factor and training your mind to stay positive all help to see life not through rose-tinted glasses but for what it is. Work, work and more work!

“Every choice comes with a consequence. Once you make a choice, you must accept responsibility. You cannot escape the consequences of your choices, whether you like them or not.” Roy T. Bennett

One small step at a time and remember that with discomfort comes growth.

Have a “happiness-filled” day!

Feeling Positive

Photo by Vinicius Wiesehofer on Pexels.com

Reading my posts you might think that she rarely has positive emotions but believe it or not, I do. It takes hard work and those emotions that drive up the happiness factor is there if I place my focus on them.

It is one of my goals to have happy thoughts throughout the day and to hike up positive thoughts as well. The way I go about it is not to let anything throw me into the helter skelter mode. I look at things carefully and then I put it aside before I take it to heart. Some things don’t deserve a second look and others, well, they need more but letting it rule my life like it used to is a thing of the past. I am learning to deal with things as they come and in a more sane manner.

One thing that helps me is this mantra. “I trust and believe that everything will work out for the best.” I pull it out whenever I feel myself going in the negative direction and believe it or not, it helps. The most positive emotion I feel is serenity. Meditation helps with that and most definitely Chachi, the cat! Two factors that help to keep me grounded and full of joy. Not all the time but more often than not.

Daily writing prompt

What positive emotion do you feel most often?

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The Haircut Trauma!

I finally got my haircut! Walking into the salon with a peace offering in hand, a box of chocolates for being a no show the other day, I had a smile carefully plastered on my face and was greeted with the same.

She was busy working on another client but turned and went, “Wow! Look at you! Your hair is sooo long!” with a sparkle in her eye. She has cut and styled my hair for many years now and I’m learning that she loves long hair! Everytime, I walk in that salon, I come out looking the same!

Anyway, I handed her the peace offering and a grin crossed her face.

HER: “Thank you! You shouldn’t have. Take a seat and I’ll be right with you!.”

I took my seat and out of the inner sanctum, a young guy appeared, not sure could have been a girl and said, “Follow me.” I was shown to the stylist’s chair and then asked, “Can I get you some tea?” This is normal procedure for a salon that charges an arm and a leg for a haircut. I opted for water but he/she brought me some tea as well.

Someone else walked out and ushered me to the shampoo bowl. What followed was heaven! My hair was shampooed, conditioned and massaged! Those were all the good parts. Then I was back in the chair and prepped for a haircut. The stylist appeared all smiles.

HER: “What can I do for you today? I wouldn’t take too much off, looks good as it is.”

ME: “It’s too long. I do want quite a bit taken off.”

A look crossed her face which said, “We’ll see about that!”

She made all the motions of clipping and trimming. Immediately I noticed that not much was being cut off. Then started the small talk. This is done to distract you! She fluffed, she measured and she trimmed, not cut, but trimmed. Then she handed me the mirror and said, “Looks lovely. Long hair suits you!”

It looked the same as when I walked in! Seeing the look of dismay on my face, she said quickly, “Let’s dry it.”

I squeaked, “It looks the same.” You’ve got to understand that in Europe, hairstylists are like Gods over here, just like the doctors and such! They know best. So, she proceeded to dry and kept saying, “It’s going to look good.” I think she was trying to convince herself more than anyone else.

The finished product looked a tad better but I still looked like I was all hair and very little else! I wanted to say, take it off another 3 inches! Instead, I walked out of there sans an arm and a leg and very little to show for it.

This morning I washed out all the stuff they put on there as part of the haircut experience. Lo and behold, the truth was staring me in the face. I was still “all hair” but it was shaped a little better and instead of my hair hanging long and flat, it seemed to have more life to it. However, I wanted it shorter, much shorter and the only way I was going to get that is if I did it myself!

It’s done for now. Live and let live until the next time around. Did I tell you I hate haircuts? I hate them just like the dental visits and all the things that go to make up what is needed to put your best face forward!

Have an amazing day.

Planning My Goals

Photo by Polina Tankilevitch on Pexels.com

Hmm….where do I start? I don’t plan anymore, I let life take me where it wants to! However, I do have a few goals that I cling to. That of finding peace, happiness and the right guy. The first two seem to be easy or rather doable but that last one, well let’s just say he is in Africa and doing the slow walk to get here!

In the meantime, I do wake up with goals in mind. They are not lofty ones and nothing to do with career building. It’s more of the emotional variety. If I go a day without drama, without something or someone rattling me and without any lessons to learn, it’s a good day in my book.

These days, I take it slow. I kick out anything that doesn’t serve me and I’m all about the good stuff. My mind is doing less chattering and it is learning to like this easy pace as well. I write when I want to and if something good happens, I let it happen without looking at it with a magnifying glass and shredding it to pieces. There is no hustle and bustle and goals, well they no longer need to be planned. That is a good place to be in.

Mr. Right!

I met up with my girlfriend yesterday. It was our usual weekly meeting to catch up on stuff and to let the conversation take us to where it wants to go. Two cups of coffee and a simple breakfast of eggs, a bread roll and a side salad usually accompanies the meeting.

Yesterday was no different. It started out with small talk and then it did a major U-Turn! The conversation went to men and in particular about Mr. Right. Don’t ask me why but it just did.

“Very few women wait for Mr. Right. Most women take the first and worst Mr. Wrong.” Elfriede Jelinek

Ring any bells? It does with me. Anyway, she was on this path of destruction. According to her, Mr. Right does not exist. I’ll add that’s because in her world, she’s into fun and nothing more. Mr. Right can stay in Africa for all she cares!

I was hanging onto my ideals for dear life. Fun is the last thing on my mind and getting anywhere is next to impossible. She decided to give me a lesson on how to find Mr. Right. Chachi, the cat, tried yesterday but he didn’t get anywhere but I didn’t tell her that.

HER: “You’re doing it all wrong. If you don’t give an inch, you’ll never find him!

ME: “It doesn’t work that way with me.”

HER: “Sure it can. Live a little or rather take that “stick” and send it packing!”

ME: “Can’t. It’s my constant companion.”

HER: “You see what the problem is don’t you? Men like some fun and you’re NO FUN!”

Okay guys, you get the drift. I wanted to point out to her that her method doesn’t work either. She’s always moaning about how the men she dates are the “here today and gone tomorrow,” variety. I wanted to tell her why but decided to keep it to myself. It goes on the lines of, “easy come, easy go.” She was on a rant fest and I let her have her way.

Friends are allowed to rant now and then. I’m allowed to let it go in one ear and out the other. It is exactly what I did. Coming back to Mr. Right, experts say, “the focus should be on building a fulfilling relationship with the person you are with.” Finding the right fit is important and someone who matches your lifestyle is also important. They don’t have to be perfect and imperfections are allowed as well.

“Find a heart that loves you at your worst, and arms that will hold you at your weakest.” Unknown

AND

“When you stop trying to find the right man and start becoming the right woman, the right man will eventually find his way to you.”

Something to bear in mind and as for Chachi and my girlfriend, I do things my way. Unfortunately, you become “dangerous” after being on the path of self-discovery because the wrong ones tend to disappear and the right ones? Well, it will take a little time before they start appearing. One can only hope!

Have an amazing day.

Emergency List

Never gave it much thought until COVID came calling. My ex told me to get some things ready just in case. The things on my list were:

Water

Canned food, like soups and veggies.

Dried foods like rice, noodles, and non-perishable items.

Toilet paper

Copies of important documents.

A first-aid kit.

A portable stove with several extra canisters of gas.

Snacks like chips, cookies and the like.

Flashlight and batteries.

Moist towelettes.

Money

Medication

Change of clothes

Personal hygience items

AND

Can Opener!

They were all stored in the cellar and with it extra blankets and pillows as well. We were well-prepared but it never got that far. I’m thankful that it never did. That was a scary time.

Daily writing prompt

Create an emergency preparedness plan.

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YOU ARE IMPORTANT (Archives)

Quite often, we let the people we interact with on a daily basis, the world around us with its idiosyncrasies and events that happen to us interpret how we feel, how we react and how much worth we give it and if we are important or not in the grand scheme of things. I am guilty as charged.

The Dalai Lama said it best, “Do not let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace.”

Yet we do it time and time again. Just yesterday, a girlfriend broke up with her so called boyfriend. He was for all purposes a NO-GO as far as I am concerned and it was clear for all to see including her but she is in a difficult place nonetheless. Finding out she was “not important” is a devastating cross to bear even if she saw it coming. Yet, this is nothing new. We hand over how important we are in a relationship to the other person and forget in the process that YOU as a person matter and you define how important you are and what you will stand for and what you won’t put up with.

“When you are important to another person, that person will always find a way to make time for you. No excuses, no lies and no broken promises.” Unknown

Relationships are hard enough as it is to navigate without having to deal with the “invisible man,” meaning the guy who says he loves you but when it comes down to showing you that you are important, he shows time and again that YOU are an afterthought and as far as the importance scale goes you are on the bottom rung of the ladder. No guessing game needed here. You will know and it is up to you to put yourself front and center and say, enough is enough!

“You are important and you matter.

Your voice matters.

Your life matters.

Your feelings matter.

Your story matters.

ALWAYS.” Unknown

Let me add to that. You as a person matters and don’t take yourself for granted either.

One Day It Just Clicks

“You realize what’s important and what isn’t. You learn to care less about what other people think of you and more about what you think of yourself.

You realize how far you’ve come and you remember when you thought things were such a mess that you would never recover. And you smile.

You smile because you are truly proud of yourself and the person you’ve fought to become.” Steve Maraboli

Finally,

“Surround yourself with people who are going to lift you higher.” Unknown

You are well worth the effort and don’t let someone show you otherwise. Your worth is determined by you so stand tall and show the world that YOU ARE IMPORTANT.

Have an amazing day.

CAN’T!

I don’t know about many people but I do know that “can’t” is up there on my list of words that jump up and scare the hell out of me!

When it shows up, it means that I have to face something of the unsavory nature and not to my liking. I don’t like a lot of things, I’m a stick in the mud as I have said before but that’s not all. Fear steps in and “can’t” shows up before anything else. I dig my heels in and refuse to budge. Then, I go within and come up with excuses as to why I can’t. Believe me, there are plenty of reasons why and it doesn’t have to make sense either! It’s my tried and true method to fight whatever it is that is causing the problem and to keep changes at bay.

I’ve lived with “can’t” all my life and it has made my life miserable. Things could have been a lot easier if I had looked at the problem like any normal human being would do but instead I take the other route. The crazy route where I sweat bullets and convince myself that I just can’t do what is asked of me.

Making headway into this problem took a long time. My journey of self-discovery has helped but it still crops up when I least expect it. Old habits die hard as they say. Coming back to the Daily Prompt, I do think that there are people out there who have the same problem I do. We just don’t like changes but unfortunately, life is not going to take a “NO” for an answer. Learning to live with what comes your way, accepting the changes and taking small steps to change your perception of things does help. Here’s the thing, most of the problems I thought I couldn’t handle turned out to be the ones that taught me how capable I am of doing exactly that.

Daily writing prompt

What is a word you feel that too many people use?

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Elon Musk!

I got a message earlier today which said that Elon Musk liked one of my posts. What?!! I couldn’t believe it, not because he had “liked” a post but because I didn’t know that he was even on here.

My second thought, “Oh Gawd!”

Why?

Some of you guys know why. Jack of all trades and…….well, never mind!

So I went to see if this was some kind of fake profile. Looks legit enough. Anyway, if it is the real guy, I’ll say, “Thank you and it is much appreciated.”

Will the real Elon Musk please stand up?!!