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The Oldest Thing?

I would say it is a pair of flip-flops that have seen better days. It is black and it has rhinestones on one side of each strap. I should have thrown them away but it never fails when warm weather rolls around, it is the first thing I look for! You can’t beat the comfort factor and even though it looks ratty, my attitude is the same as Melania Trump and that is, “I really don’t care!” How did she get the Einstein Visa? That’s for another time. Moving on…..

There are other sandals but it is this one that has kept me captive for about three years. I almost slipped and had a fall last year wearing these well-worn flip-flops because the toe thongs are a little loose but I escaped with nothing more than a sore muscle in my foot. Did I learn my lesson? Nope, it is back on this morning and I just love the freedom that flip-flops give not to mention that it allows your feet to breathe and it keeps them cool and dry when it is hot outside. However, the downside is that flip-flops can cause injuries so wear them only when it is necessary and not while you are doing sports or hiking.

Tell that to my feet because they are gazing up at me with a smile plastered on them!

The Poem

I’m not big on poems but this one touched a chord within me. It talks about all the things we do when “struggling with loss, pain, grief, change and transition.” It also talks about how releasing the need to control situations and emotions can be liberating. We often hold on when we should let go and we have those memories on speed redial. The wound never heals but what if we can just let it go “like a leaf falling from a tree?” Anyway, this poem is about letting go and learning to move on.

SHE LET GO

Without a thought or a word, she let go.

She let go of the fear, she let go of the judgments. She let go of the opinions swarming around her head. She let go of the committee of indecision within her. She let go of all the ‘right’ reasons. Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go…….

No one was around when it happened. There was no applause or congratulations. No one thanked her or praised her. No one noticed a thing. Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.

There was no effort. There was no struggle. It wasn’t good and it wasn’t bad. It was what it was, and it is just that. In the space of letting go, she let it all be.

A small smile came over her face. A light breeze blew through her. And the sun and the moon shone forevermore.

Rev. Safire Rose

LET IT GO (whatever it is) and have an amazing day.

Leader or Follower?

I would say both. At times, I am a leader and at times a lamb that is being led to the slaughter! I think I do both well although I am trying to be less of a follower and more of…..I wouldn’t say a leader but someone who knows her own mind and knows in which direction to go for her own good.

I used to lead a team of people but those days are over with. I did the job well but those chaotic and stressful times are a thing of the past and these days I am my own person and I do as I please. Some days I would like some of that chaos back where your day simply flies past and you wonder where the time went. However, I wouldn’t change what I have now for anything in the world.

To answer your question, I do both things well. If I had to choose, I would say neither. I’m just someone who has her head in the clouds and loves daydreaming more than anything else!

LOL!

Photo by Vinicius Wiesehofer on Pexels.com

Ten Things You’ll Never Hear a Man Say.

Here honey, you use the remote.

You know, I’d like to see her again, but her breasts are just too big.

Ooh, Antonio Banderas AND Brad Pitt? That’s one movie I gotta see!

While, I’m up, can I get you anything?

Honey, since we don’t have anything else planned, will you go to the wallpaper store with me?

Sex isn’t that important; sometimes I just want to be held.

Why don’t you go to the mall with me and help me pick out a pair of shoes?

Aww, forget Monday night football, let’s watch Melrose Place.

Hey, let me hold your purse while you try that on.

We never talk anymore.

Ten Things You’ll Never Hear a Woman Say.

What do you mean today’s our anniversary?

Can we not talk to each other tonight?

I’d rather just watch TV.

Ooh, this diamond ring is way too big!!

And for our honeymoon we’re going fishing in Alaska!

Can our relationship get a little more physical?

I’m tired of being “just friends.”

Honey, does this outfit make my butt look too small?

Aww, don’t stop for directions. I’m sure you’ll be able to figure out how to get there.

Is that phone for me? Tell ’em I’m not here.

I don’t care if it is on sale, 300 dollars is too much for a designer dress!

There you have it. Men are from Mars and women are from Venus!

Top Five Fruits I Love

I love fruits and they are part of my daily diet. I love the normal variety of apples, oranges and grapes but I do love the exotic variety as well. It comes from having lived in Asia during my younger days and the assortment of fruit there was endless. Here are some of my top picks.

GUAVA

A neighbor used to have a guava tree growing right next to a dwarf coconut tree and we could go into the garden and pick the fruit anytime we wanted to. I didn’t know it at the time but guava aids digestion, is low-calorie and has a high-fiber content and it has other benefits as well. Since I live in Europe now, they are hard to come by but when I do see them in the supermarket, I snap them up regardless the price!

PEACHES

I love the juicy deliciousness of this fruit. There is nothing nicer than a juicy peach when the weather is warm outside. It is a good source of vitamins and antioxidants not to mention that this fuzzy skinned fruit is delicious as well.

STRAWBERRIES

They are in season now. This sweet, juicy fruit is great on anything. People here make strawberry tarts and they use them in salads and in milkshakes as well. I just love them fresh with a dollop of cream.

PAPAYAS

I got my first taste of papaya in Asia. This tropical fruit has many benefits. It reduces inflammation, aids digestion and boosts your immune system. However, they are hard to find in Europe but recently the supermarkets here have been carrying them but they are not cheap. One papaya costs around 5 euros and that’s for a small one and when compared to prices in Asia where you can get them for pennies or rather dirt cheap, people stay away from them. I do get them when I see them because I love the taste of papaya on a hot summer’s day.

DRAGON FRUIT

This weird-looking fruit that looks alien-like is sweet, juicy and has many benefits. It is said to improve heart health, promote gut health, enhance skin health and boost your immune system as well not to mention it is delicious served in salads or by itself. It is one of my favorites but here again the price is daunting and they don’t show up on the shelves that often. I get them when I see them.

Fruits are my go to when I need a snack not counting the cheesecake of course!

The Search for Happiness

A man asked Gautama Buddha, “I want happiness.”

Buddha said, First remove, “I” that’s EGO, then remove , “WANT,” that’s DESIRE. See now you are left with only, “HAPPINESS.”

Is it really that simple to find happiness? Okay, I can give this method a try BUT I find that when I remove “EGO” and “WANT,” there is something else glaring me in the face! It is, “WHAT NOW?!!!”

According to Buddhist wisdom, there are 5 steps to happiness. They are:

SMILE MORE

WORRY LESS

BE PRESENT

GIVE MORE

EXPECT LESS

I believe in the smiling more part. No problems there. Worrying less is almost a no go with me. Being present, I am working on. Giving more…..it is a work in progress and expecting less always gets me in trouble. Basically, I’m not quite there yet. Finding that happiness path that is.

What else?

“A disciplined mind brings happiness.”

Oh Gawd! This is even worse. Tell that “monkey” I call my mind to take orders and you’ll see what I mean! Marching on to the next happiness mantra.

“Happiness does not depend on what you have or who you are….

It solely relies on what you think.”

WHAT?!!! I give up!

No more searching for happiness wisdom today. I’ll do it my way. The sun is shining and I’m going to slip into my flip-flops, go to the garden and let the sun warm my face and listen to the birdsong to calm my mind and to let happiness seep in. Sorry Buddha but maybe next time around.

There will be no more thinking, no more telling my mind to do something it doesn’t want to do and I’ll just let the day go as it wants to. How’s that for a happiness mantra?

Have an amazing day.

This Moment in Time (Archives)

If you think about it, this moment in time is all we have. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow is looming somewhere in the distance but today, more specifically, this very moment is where we exist.

“We’re so busy watching out for what’s just ahead of us that we don’t take time to enjoy where we are.” Bill Waterson

Are you in a safe place? Are you protected? Are you at peace? These are things which matter.

I overthink and it is mostly about the past and then I jump to the future. It is an erratic pattern of thoughts and I am well aware of what I’m doing but still I persist. Last night, I decided to reel in all my jumbled up thoughts because they were causing another sleepless night and then started looking at each one individually and realized that I was dabbling in things I cannot change. The past is done with and the future is unknown. I looked at the moment I was in and realized I was safe, I was warm and I had a roof over my head. I had Chachi, the cat, cuddled up next to me and the world, for the here and now, was a peaceful place. I stayed there for awhile and like a lullaby, it rocked me to sleep.

The moments count. They define our psyche and being in several places in one time does not help matters much. Having one foot in the past and one in the future is not going to do it. Stay in the here and now. What are you doing now? It matters. Trying to put the past, the future and everything else in one basket is a sure fire way to disaster. Sort it out. Make peace with the past, learn the lessons you need to learn and then close the door behind you. The future will be determined by what you do today. Give it loving care, your attention, and maybe, just maybe a brighter tomorrow is around the corner. We can only hope.

Why is being in the present moment so important?

According to powerfullyyou.org, “it can decrease the activities of your nervous system, reduce stress, and help you to feel more regulated.” Tony Robbins says, “it allows you to focus all of your energy on the task at hand.” He further adds, “where focus goes, energy flows.”

Easier said than done? I agree. My mind loves jumping around. It’s like a “monkey” which loves to climb, run, twist and do whatever is necessary to keep me from the task at hand and it often succeeds. It is going to take lots of practice before the “monkey” learns to behave! There is still hope.

LET THE MOMENTS COUNT!

Have an amazing day.

One Small Improvement In My Life?

I need to stop being too nice! This “niceness” bit sometimes brings trouble and instead of shutting it down immediately, I try to find ways of making things easier for the other person and “BOOM” I find myself in the same old boat. I wind up asking what happened and why did it happen?

Let’s look at this example. I meet a guy and I can tell from the start that there is nothing that connects us. NADA! Instead of giving a flat out no, I play, “Here we go around the Mulberry bush!” The guy thinks that there is a chance so he keeps trying harder. I get frustrated and think, “Don’t you get the message?”

He doesn’t because I don’t give a forceful NO! Let’s look at another example. I have a girlfriend who is never on time. I put up with it because I am this “nice” person, not a pushover but nice. Anyway, this last time, we made an appointment to meet and I was there 10 minutes early. Twenty minutes in and she was a no show. I wrote but no answer. Forty minutes in and still no show and no message. Forty-five minutes later, she writes nonchalantly, “Ooh, I forgot!” If there ever was a straw that broke the camel’s back,” that was it! I finally came out of my “nice” mode and gave her a piece of my mind. It’s been two weeks and we haven’t heard from each other. When we do, I hope punctuality is at the top of her list as far as I am concerned. I can only hope.

I want to take niceness out of the picture and replace it with speaking my mind, saying it like it is and NOT mincing words! It is a hard ask but those are some improvements I would like to make in my life.

Daily writing prompt

What’s one small improvement you can make in your life?

View all responses

Accepting Changes

I hate changes and it has never been my strong suit. However, life has decided to give me more than my share of changes to show me it is needed and that nothing ever stands still for long. I am learning to roll with the punches and also learning to stand back up stronger than before. I think the sooner we learn that life is all about changes, the better off we’ll be. I am learning to accept the changes, so life let’s take a pause so I can come up for air before I have to accept another change!

Here are some beautiful quotes that will help you to accept changes for what they are, just a part of life and its idiosyncrasies.

“Embrace uncertainty. Some of the most beautiful chapters in our lives won’t have a title until much later.” Unknown

Can’t wait to see what those titles will be. Survivor perhaps?

“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new.” Socrates

“Don’t let yesterday use up too much of today.” Cherokee Proverb

“The price of doing the same old thing is far higher than the price of change.” Bill Clinton

“Life is like a GPS, it will reroute you when you least expect it, just sit back and enjoy the ride.” Unknown

Oh Gawd!! I don’t like that one too much.

“Change is not merely necessary to life, it is life.” Alvia Toffler

I need a little more time for this to sink in.

“The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.” Unknown

This one has sunk in. I am on my way but slowly!

“Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen.” Michael Jordan

I think I am one of those people.

I like this one the best.

“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.” W.C. Fields

Oh gawd, I see another change coming on and another lesson to learn! I was only kidding with that last one. Take it easy and CHILL!

My Angel

You’ve probably read many posts about him but there is never enough I can say about this person. He walked in when my world was in shambles and little did I know then that he would take my hand and show me the way out.

He was tall and handsome with reddish blond hair. His eyes were green and he had a kind way about him. When we met, I liked him well enough but I kept my distance. After a few months, he told me he was all in. I couldn’t tell him the same. I wanted to but I couldn’t. What more could I ask for? He made me feel like a million dollars and treated me like I was made of glass. I guess at that time I was. I was fragile and I was vulnerable. The divorce had almost destroyed me and I wasn’t ready to let anyone get close to me ever again. We carried on as very close friends. He was of Irish-American descent so his name for me was, “Lovely.” I don’t know if that is an Irish thing but it sounded like it was. More importantly, he didn’t know it at the time but that name gave me my self-esteem back. I was feeling bruised, hurt and far from LOVELY! The name stuck and even to the very end, that name stayed. The last words he said to me were, “I like you with your hair down. You look lovely.” That was two days before he passed away.

What can I say about my angel. He was there in my deepest darkest moments and he held my hand and showed me how to laugh and to live again. Our time together was devoid of drama. It was peaceful and it was filled with a special kind of friendship. This was needed to get me back to normal again. When his job was done, he left me behind. As I have said before, angels never stay for long. Soon another anniversary will roll around and I will think of all the moments we had shared but mostly I will think of this person who was there when I needed him the most and who showed me what real love was all about even if I couldn’t show him the same.

Here’s to you my angel. Some days I wish you were still here to show me the way but the journey forward is mine alone. I know we’ll meet again of this I am sure but until then, thank you for what you gave me, the precious gift of finding myself again. I will be forever thankful to you but you already know that.

Chachi, the cat, wears that name with pride now. It is only fitting because he was your gift to me. I know you are at peace, free of pain and flying with the angels and looking down at me because you promised you would.

Until we meet again.