Tag: hope

The Prep

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The first OP went better than I expected. I thought I was going to die but I’m still here and recuperating. The wound seems to be healing and I made six rounds in the garden today, walking from one end to other with no problems. Still, I am impatient and I want to get back to my normal routine of 40 minutes of bone-busting workouts!

Patience you say? Exactly what friends are saying. Anyway, the second OP is looming in the not so distant future, less than five weeks away and I’ll be wheeled into that operating room again. Seems like a long time before that happens but I know it is just a matter of time before I am staring it in the face!

I prepared like an athlete for the first one. Working out with weights, cardio, walks, meditation, and eating right were all part and parcel of my daily routine. It seemed to help because I was up and walking a few hours after the procedure and did 4 or 5 rounds in the hospital room with no help at all. Add no pain to it, no meds and no painkillers and it seemed like I was coasting through on clouds. Well, not quite. I was still attached to a couple of things but according to the Gods, the doctors, I was doing exceptionally well.

Coming back to the second OP, this one is going to be different. I know what to expect but the outcome is still unknown. Plus, I’m not able to workout like I want. These itty bitty walks in the garden is not going to do it. Keeping off my feet and resting is not going to do it either so I’m worried. Will I fare as well?

I don’t know and that is scaring the …. out of me! Planning ahead has always been my thing and I try not to leave things to chance. I find that I can’t do that with this one. Have faith? I am trying but just when I think I’ve conquered my fears, another bigger and stronger one rolls in. It comes in waves.

Concentrating on what I can control is my next step. Today, I made my six rounds in the garden. Then I got my bag and decided to pack the essentials again. This time a much smaller bag. Wishful thinking? Maybe, but fingers, toes, and everything else crossed!

The bag is not fully packed, it never is. I am “female” remember. We always need more. The next step is to eat right, try not to lift anything that could cause problems and get myself out of the house! It is getting claustrophobic!

A friend is going to come by later and drive me to the cafe. We plan to have coffee and breakfast there and people watch for a little while. It should be a good outing and will do wonders for my mind and psyche.

Have an amazing day.

Back from the Dead!

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I thought I was a goner when I went in for the surgery. It was going to be a two-hour operation with risks involved as with most procedures that requires a surgeon’s hands to put things back together again. You probably read about my fears here and the feeling that I was going to die was front and center!

It is now Day 6 after the surgery. I came home yesterday with another OP looming next month. What? Yes, they need to do another one to make sure everything is as it should be. According to one doctor, “You will be a new person once it is done.” Or dead was my retort but I kept it to myself.

They (the doctors) expected pain to be a mainstay but were surprised when none showed up. I was hooked up to different things and one in particular I couldn’t stand! A nurse helped me to walk a few hours after the surgery and I did fine. She left the room and I decided to do it on my own. I trained like an athlete before the procedure so I knew I was fully capable of doing it. I walked the length and width of the room and did it with no problems except for a few twinges here and there. I jotted the progress down. Two hours later, I did it again! By end of day, I had done 5 rounds!

Day 2, I was up at break of day. I couldn’t sleep because the anesthesia was giving me a run for the money! It was still coursing through my veins and sleeplessness or rather insomnia was one of the after effects. The main thing, I wasn’t being given pain killers. My body was reacting well and HEALING I hoped. They checked the vitals and everything was excellent. The light at the end of the tunnel?

It looked like it except for the second OP looming in the not so distant future. I made up my mind to go throw the storm and meet it head on when it shows up. I still had time, for now the healing needs to take place and I will work hard on that. No workouts, no heavy lifting, no driving, and no eating crap! Coffee is down to one cup a day, anything that can irritate the wound is out the window, and lots of rest and relaxation. I can weather the first two, that last one is going to be hard. I LOVE moving around!

I made it up and down the stairs yesterday! Very, very, slowly of course. I can’t lift Chachi and hold him close because he is considered too heavy! So, I’ve been stroking him and giving him kisses, lots of it.

Recovery needs lots of work and I’ve already started. I have to look at other alternatives of keeping myself fit and ready for the next phase of what is coming up. Walking in the garden is one option, not fast but slow and steady is the way to go. Three times a day should do it.

I was rolled into that operating theatre with two heavyweights by my side. My angel who never leaves my side and the ONE who moves mountains. I’m sure he guided the surgeon’s hands as well!

THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!

A Tough Day

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I spent most of yesterday in the hospital. What should have been a pre-op meeting with the anesthesiologist and the surgeon turned out to be a long drawn out affair. They were short on staff so it meant long waiting times.

Being punctual, I showed up on time. It was time to meet them and to see what is coming my way. The first meeting was with a lady who asked a lot of questions and took down the next of kin’s information in case something goes wrong! Then it was back to the waiting room. Forty minutes later, I was called in again for blood samples and an urine sample. Back out again in the waiting room, 3o minutes later the meeting with the anesthesiologist took place. A nice guy who explained the procedure, asked more questions, and told me, “Operations always have risks.” Hmm….that didn’t help to quiet my already raging mind. I was sent outside again and it was time to wait again. Then I was called in to another office and I met with the surgeon, not the one who will be doing the procedure, she said someone from her team will be doing the actual operation but it won’t be her. Why am I talking to people who will not be doing the actual procedure? Maybe it works differently in Germany.

Anyway, we had a good talk, a few laughs, and then I was sent back out again. Thirty minutes later, I went into another room and was told to show up bright and early on Monday. I should be there at 7:30 a.m. and then it will take off from there. What I didn’t tell you is that I might need two operations! According to the surgeon, two hours wouldn’t give them enough time to do everything they need to do and it looked like another operation would be necessary to finish the job.

I AM GOING TO DIE!

That’s exactly what I told her and she laughed. “No, you are not going to die,” those were her words.

Am I feeling better with this pre-op talk? What do you think?!!! The thing is I have no choice, I’ve signed the papers and it’s a GO on Monday. God, help me!