mental-health – Page 24

Solitude

“A place where you meet yourself, where you embrace and appreciate your own company. Exactly, where you face your fears and rethink your decisions. Solitude is that essential place to recharge our inner energy.” Tuwalily

It’s a place I go to where I can shut out the noise, the distractions and the clutter that make up my life. I go within where there is peace to be found, resilience and strength. Solitude and stillness is where answers can be found and I get the strength to move on from where I’m at.

Solitude is defined as a “healthy, personal discipline that allows you to engage in meaningful self-reflection. Loneliness, however, is a state of sadness because one has no friends or company.” fullsailleadership.com

I embrace solitude and there is a certain deliciousness that comes from being still and listening to what is being told to you. When you get rid of the chatter, you get clarity.

“Solitude is where I place my chaos to rest and awaken my inner peace.” Unknown

Meditation, yoga or just a simple walk in the fields helps to open up a world of possibilities. A world where you are not confronted by what others think of you, of having to measure up, or of conforming to what is considered the norm. You can let go and just be yourself. It’s a place where you can go deep within and really see what you’re holding there, find out who you are and a place where you can learn to let go of what doesn’t serve you. There is peace within and unlimited resources but in order to reap the benefits, you need to come face to face with the ugliness, the so-called remnants of your past and retrain your mind to see different. Change your mindset and everything will start falling into place as it should. Solitude is where I find my peace and if I’m willing, it shows me who I am and what I need to change to get to the other side.

“Solitude is dangerous. It’s addicting. Once you see how peaceful it is, you don’t want to deal with people anymore because they drain your energy.” Unknown

I spend a lot of time by myself. I’m learning to love it to the point that I choose my own company to that of being with friends or family. I think that I am my own best friend which is a good thing but as the quote says, it can be addicting and like I sometimes say, I’m a recluse or at least feel like one at times. I’ve come up with a solution to this predicament. I’m really going to make an effort to spend more time with people to break this monotony because both is needed to make me a complete person. However, home is where my heart is.

My bouts of solitude has made me stronger and fully capable of dealing with what life throws my way. There is strength in solitude so seek it, use it and learn that there is a source you can go to when life decides it’s that time again. What time? Time to learn another lesson and before you go, “Oh no!” make solitude your friend and ally and things will start looking up.

“Make yourself a priority once in a while. It’s not selfish. It’s necessary.” Unknown

AND

“I’m not Anti-Social. I’m Pro-Solitude.” Unknown

Have an amazing day.

The Little Big Voice

We’ve all heard it whenever we do something wrong, or think we have done something wrong. We hear it when we take a fall, when we fail or when we know it is wrong and still do it only to find out that it was the wrong thing to do. It is at these times that the “inner critic” within is the loudest.

It yells, “Are you stupid? Why did you do that?”

It shouts, “You knew better but YOU still had to do that! WHY?”

“Your inner critic is the voice of your fear with a megaphone.” Unknown

There are other such moments but you get the picture. According to http://www.imermelbpsychology.com.au., your inner critic is that voice in your head that has a cold, demanding, harsh, punishing or mean quality to it,” and if you look deeper or further, “It is usually experienced as an inner voice attacking a person, saying that they are bad, wrong, inadequate, worthless, guilty and so on.” wikipedia.org

It is not a nice little voice and sometimes it booms when it wants to be heard. It has a tendency to make you feel anxious and often it magnifies the bad and minimizes the good in our lives. However, the inner critic is not something you’re born with but it is developed during childhood when a child often hears harsh criticism from “parents, caretakers, teachers and peers,” and it can change the way the brain develops. When it is given constant reinforcement of such negativity it helps to internalize self-judgment and a critical stance of oneself. The unhealthy inner critic leans towards destructive criticism and it can produce feelings of shame, low self-esteem, depression, self-doubt and it can undermine your self-confidence.

“Your inner critic re-affirms untruths about yourself that you have internalized to be true.” Athena Laz

This little big voice is not your cheerleader but it is very adapt at giving you the constant thumbs-down whenever you question something you’ve done or have thought about. Instead of bolstering you up, it joins in to tear you down and dances to the tune with glee. It is also exhausting, demoralizing and tells you in its loudest voice that you are not enough.

“The negative self-talk from your inner critic can be soothed by increasing your self-compassion and self kindness.” @heytiffanyroe

According to jessicaabel.com, you can soften that harsh and demanding voice. “When you access your inner critic and give it space and self-compassion, it will be more likely to ease up on you. When we slow down, ask questions, and take a breath; when we stop and don’t try to overwhelm and undermine that voice, we’re likely to find a little bit of wisdom about something that needs to be healed.”

“Understanding how the critical inner voice has affected your actions and held you back from opportunities will open your eyes to the power you have given to your inner critic.” Usha Maharaj

Turning down the volume on all that criticism, sort of taking away that megaphone to hush that loud and critical voice is one way to do it. Slaying it is not the answer because a little bit of “inner critic” is a good thing. Letting it get out of hand is another thing altogether and learning to respond to it is a good thing as well. This takes a lot of practice because you have to switch from silencing your inner critic to listening to it with empathy. Recruit it and add it your team. That seems like a good idea because we can all use some extra help in building us up and I think it (the inner critic) wants to help but unlike your intuition which has your best interest at heart, this spoiled and often loud voice just needs some taming to make it work for you.

If all else fails, you can:

“Press the switch off button to your inner critic and start being awesome.” Unknown

Have an amazing day.

YOU ARE IMPORTANT

Quite often, we let the people we interact with on a daily basis and the world around us with its idiosyncrasies and events that happen to us interpret how we feel, how we react and how much worth we give it and if we are important or not in the grand scheme of things. I am guilty as charged.

The Dalai Lama said it best, “Do not let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace.”

Yet we do it time and time again. Just yesterday, a girlfriend broke up with her so called boyfriend. He was for all purposes a NO-GO as far as I was concerned and it was clear for all to see including her but she was in a difficult place nonetheless. Finding out she was “not important” was a devastating cross to bear even if she saw it coming. Yet, this is nothing new. We hand over how important we are in a relationship to the other person and forget in the process that YOU as a person matter and you define how important you are and what you will stand for and what you won’t put up with.

“When you are important to another person, that person will always find a way to make time for you. No excuses, no lies and no broken promises.” Unknown

Relationships are hard enough as it is to navigate without having to deal with the “invisible man,” meaning the guy who says he loves you but when it comes down to showing you that you are important, he shows time and again that YOU are an afterthought and as far as the importance scale goes you are on the bottom rung of the ladder. The disappearing act happens not once, not twice but over and over again. No guessing game needed here. It is up to you to put yourself front and center and to say enough is enough!

“You are important and you matter.

Your voice matters.

Your life matters.

Your feelings matter.

Your story matters.

ALWAYS.” Unknown

Let me add to that. You as a person matter and don’t let anyone take you for granted either.

One Day It Just Clicks

“You realize what’s important and what isn’t. You learn to care less about what other people think of you and more about what you think of yourself.

You realize how far you’ve come and you remember when you thought things were such a mess that you would never recover. And you smile.

You smile because you are truly proud of yourself and the person you’ve fought to become.” Steve Maraboli

Finally,

“Surround yourself with people who are going to lift you higher.” Unknown

You are well worth the effort and don’t let anyone show you otherwise. Your worth is determined by you, so stand tall and show the world that YOU ARE IMPORTANT.

Have an amazing day.

The Hard Things

Most of us cringe at the thought of doing the hard things. Be it a break-up, walking away, losing a job and letting go of things that no longer serve us, it is an exceptionally hard thing to do. It is not something we look forward to because it means taking the bull by the horns and waging war on what seems to be an impossible task at first. Given time, patience, perseverance and a hard-headed look at what needs to be done to get to the other side, we find it is doable but not easy.

Easy is not what life is about. If anything, easy is not in its vocabulary. It seems at times that “living” is about going through the hard stuff. Sometimes one and sometimes a string of unsolvable and often times impossible situations but you and I know that it is those hard times and how you deal with it that brings out the strength in you. Sure, it would be easier if we didn’t have to deal with them but when has that stopped life from throwing it our way?

Where would we be without them? Probably having a great time without having to walk through the minefield of the hard stuff all equipped and designed to bring you down to your knees if you make a false move. There is no right or wrong way of going about it, it is trial and error and an undying resilience to take what is handed to you and to make it work for you. We’ve all made those false moves where we’ve crashed and burned and just when you think there is nothing left to do except to pick up the pieces and make the most of it, there is light at the end of the dark tunnel. There is that open door that beckons because as you know when one door closes, another one opens but it is human nature or at least it is mine to look past it and back at the one that has closed and is no longer available.

“Hard things are hard because there are no easy answers or recipes. They are hard because your emotions are at odds with your logic. They are hard because you don’t know the answer and you cannot ask for help without showing weakness.” Ben Horowitz

The hard stuff has kept me captive for longer than I want to admit. Truth is, I don’t do “HARD” well. Holding on is my nemesis, letting go of things that no longer serve me is harder still and moving on, well that is an impossible task at times. I hold on hoping that changes will come my way but it never does. Things happen for a reason, people are the way they are because they are wired that way and looking and hoping is not going to change things. However, whatever life throws your way, there is a lesson in there somewhere but it is hard to see when it first hits you. I think we fail miserably at times because we walk in circles, bang our heads on that closed door and refuse to move on until we are drained of energy and there is nothing else to do but to walk through that open door. Human nature at its best? I think so.

We are fully capable and have the strength within to meet the hard stuff head on and to tame it if necessary. It is the fear of the unknown in sync with the weakness within that works hand-in-hand to stop us in our tracks, makes us tremble where we stand as we whisper, I can’t. You and I have had our baptism by fire in one form or another, of this I am sure. The hard thing is just one more obstacle to overcome, nothing more, nothing less. We tend to make it more than what it is. Life is a never-ending circle of challenges in the form of “hard things” to overcome. It is mixed in with the good stuff but it is the hard stuff that brings forth the real you. Your strength, your power and most of all your ability to slay it where it stands takes courage, growth and an attitude of never giving up which will put the “hard stuff” in its place. Who knows if shown the door more often than not, it might decide to stay away. We can hope can’t we?

“I see your fear, and it’s big. I also see your courage, and it’s bigger. We can do hard things.” Glennon Doyle

Have an amazing day.

Stay Calm, Stay Focused

Staying calm and focused when your mind tells you otherwise is normal. It is human nature. My mind goes haywire and jumps around like a monkey when I’m stressed or I have to concentrate on what is before me and what needs to get done. Oftentimes I need to take a step back, go within myself to find the strength in silence and to focus on what I need to do to move on. It doesn’t always work but it does work if I stay focused.

“The ability to remain calm and focused on what truly matters is a superpower.” Unknown

Be like the tree that has weathered many storms and is still standing. It takes practice and a certain kind of mindset to weather a storm, any storm. If you’ve never worked a day in your life and the time has come to find a job, to get independent and to stand on your own two feet, you tend to lose focus because the unknown is formidable. However, with each fall you take, you gain the strength and the know how to get back up and to keep moving. Time, focus, calm and lots of practice makes it possible and soon you will be standing like that tree, strong and unshakeable in any storm. Breathe and keep moving. Standing still is never the answer.

“Breathe darling. This is just a chapter. It’s not your whole story.” S. C. Lourie

Stay focused but not on the wrong things. I can’t do this is not one of them. This is way too scary is not one of them. The ‘monster’ is too hard to slay is not one of them. Focus on finding the positive within the negative. Be prepared to put one foot in front of the other but whatever you do, do not take the easy way out or rather the coward’s way out and give up. It is easy to give up but much harder to step into an unknown arena and to win the day. YOU CAN DO THIS!

“Sometimes you need to slow down, remain calm, and simply let life happen. Take a deep breathe and focus on the simple important things: you are alive, you are breathing, you are enough as you are. You got this.” Unknown

Finally, tell the monkey in your brain that keeps dragging you all over the place with no end in sight to take a hike! Breathe, calm yourself down and stay focus on what you need to do to make it. YOU’VE GOT THIS!

Have an amazing day.

The Lighted Candle

The primary symbolism of candles lies in their ability to illuminate darkness. Candles, with their gentle glow, symbolize the search for truth, clarity and inner illumination. I equate quotes as having the same power. If you listen carefully they open doors, lead you forward and they teach without delivering a sermon.

Some of my all-time favorite quotes come from a blogger who is also the creator of the social media movement “The Single Woman.” She has written many “scathing articles and books and don’t forget quotes about her ex-boyfriend and about his pathological emotional abuse and betrayals. The lady speaks to my heart. Here are some of my favorite quotes written by Mandy Hale.

“Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don’t belong.”

“Just be yourself. Let people see the real, imperfect, flawed, quirky, weird, beautiful, magical person, that you are.”

And if they can’t handle you, it is their problem not yours.

“Ten years from now, make sure you can say that you chose your life, you didn’t settle for it.”

This one is scary. Sometimes you want to settle because fear takes over but settling means giving up and you are too important for that. Do not settle for less than you want.

“The less you respond to rude, critical, argumentative people, the more peaceful your life will become.”

This one is exhausting. Learning to deal with such people is never easy, add trying to make them see different is like talking to the wall. Let it go and embrace peace.

“You’re actually MORE likely to be single when you have a lot to offer because you’ll realize that most people aren’t worthy of all that greatness.”

I totally agree, well, it is actually a more positive way of looking at it.

“It’s OK to be scared. Being scared means you’re about to do something really, really brave.”

Fear is my second name but I suppose I have done things to be proud of in spite of it. Brave things? Maybe….

“Confidence is the ability to feel Beautiful without needing someone to tell you.”

Ok this one hit home. I wrote an article yesterday about one of my OFF days and looking like a nightmare in the process. A friend told me later, I can turn all your nightmares into dreams! The problem is I lack confidence so that didn’t do much to get me out of Nightmare land!

Confidence is not:

“They will like me.”

Confidence is:

“I’ll be fine if they don’t.”

“Sometimes our lives have to be completely shaken up, changed and rearranged to relocate us to the place we’re meant to be.”

Been there, done that, many times over. Still looking for the relocation part.

“A person being “too busy” is a myth. People make time for the things that are really important to them.”

This is the absolute truth. No time means YOU are not important.

“If you lost it, it’s because you’re meant to find something better. Trust, let go and make room for what’s coming.”

Doing exactly that but can someone tell me how long this process will take?

“To get over the past, you first have to accept that the past is over, no matter how many times you revisit it, analyze it, regret it, or sweat it….it’s over. It can hurt you no more.”

True but you sure can learn from it and not repeat the same mistakes the next time around.

“You’re beautiful just the way you are. Shine on, and dare anyone to turn off your lights.”

“The only keeper of your happiness is YOU. Stop giving people power to control your smile, your worth and your attitude!”

There you go, perfectly said I might add.

Where are you going today? Are you dealing with negatives or are you heading towards more positive pastures? Let go and move towards the light. Take the candlelight with you and pass it on to someone who really needs it.

Think of one thing you are grateful for. When I first heard this, I had a hard time finding just one little thing. Within a few minutes, I had my basket full! I am grateful for the roof over my head, the warm bed, the beautiful fall day, the food that gave me joy today and the people who are dear to me. Of course, Chachi, the cat is at the top of that list too.

HAVE AN AMAZING DAY

False Friends

Fake friends are, “people who pretend to care about you but don’t actually have your best interests at heart. Also known as false friends or fair-weather friends, they tend to act like friends only when it benefits them.” http://www.verywellmind.com

I’m sure you’ve had one or two of these characters as so called friends and perhaps you still do. They’re opportunistic, insincere, and are only interested in what they can gain from the relationship and couldn’t care one iota less about you. When it comes to “showing up” in times of need, they are nowhere to be found.

Here’s how to identify fake friends:

They show little or no interest in you, your life and your problems. It is all about them.

They’ll approach you when they need your help but are invisible when you need theirs.

Their support is based on conditions, only when it benefits them.

They bring negative vibes into your life because they are in a negative place themselves.

They are jealous and they try to compete with you rather than be happy for you.

They break your trust by talking behind your back.

Spending time with them often drains your energy and leaves you feeling like there is something missing.

That’s because there is. A true friend is someone who helps you up when you’re down but you can forget about this concept with “false friends.”

Here are some quotes that help to bring the message home.

“Everybody isn’t your friend. Just because they hang around you and laugh with you doesn’t mean they are your friend. People pretend well. At the end of the day, real situations expose fake people, so pay attention.” Unknown

“Fake friends are like actors, they play their part until the curtain falls.” Unknown

“Crocodiles are easy. They try to kill and eat you. People are harder. They pretend to be your friend first.” Steve Irwin

“Fake friends stab you and pretend they are the ones bleeding.” Unknown

“Stop texting first and see how many dead plants you’ve been watering.” Unknown

I love this one and it does speak to the heart of the matter.

“A two-faced friend is like a wolf in sheep’s clothing, hiding their true intentions behind a mask of friendship.” Unknown

“An open enemy is often a better thing to have than a false friend.” Unknown

“Sometimes the person you are willing to take the bullet for is the one who pulls the trigger.” Unknown

Choose your friends carefully and if one of these wolves in sheep’s clothing show up proclaiming friendship, you know what to do.

“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” Walter Winchell

AND

“Friendship isn’t a big thing – it’s a million little things.” Paulo Coelho

Have an amazing day.

The Five W’s of Life

Photo by Natasha Fernandez on Pexels.com

There are many lessons to learn during our lifetime but according to overstu.com, the five W’s of Life helps to navigate us through the intricacies of this long and winding road if we learn the answers to the five question words. They are who, what, when, where and why. Learn them, find the answers and practice them to make the most of your life.

“WHO you are is what makes you special. Do not change for anyone.”

The message here is that you are special and unique and you do not have to change to fit anyone’s idea of what normal is. Just remember, you have something to offer this world just as you are. The people who are meant to be in your life will accept you flaws and all. No changes needed or perhaps just a little tweaking needed. Always remember YOU are enough.

“WHAT lies ahead will always be a mystery. Do not be afraid to explore.”

This is a hard one. We want that crystal ball to show us what lies ahead because the future is murky and because of our need to know before taking that step forward. Guess what? Whether you want to or not, there is no stopping the future and you will just have to deal with it when it comes around. You can’t change the future but you can make it better by living in the here and now and putting your best effort forward to make it a good one. Of course, fear not the future is the message but it is easier said than done.

“WHEN life pushes you over, you push back.”

I don’t like this one. It means you’ll have to be brave to deal with whatever comes your way. You can certainly choose to give up but that’s not an option and if you want to survive what life throws your way, you’ll have to toughen up, put your big girl panties on and deal with it. Failure is one such experience. Not trying another and it often brings about missed opportunities and staying within your comfort zone another bad decision. Try and try harder. If you fail the first time around so what, try again. The message here is to NEVER GIVE UP!

WHERE there are choices to make, make the ones you won’t regret.

This one is self-explanatory. Make the right choices and life will be so much better but how many of us do that? We love the wrong people, we make the wrong choices in food, health and a whole host of other things. Human nature I suppose BUT if we are lucky enough we can still learn to make the right choices to get ourselves back on track again. Not always possible but here again, never give up and keep on trying.

WHY things happen will never be certain. Take it in and move forward.

This is a big one. How often have we asked why? Why did the relationship break up? Why did a loved one have to die? Why did this happen to me? All legit questions and we want answers where there is none to be had. You’ll have to trust that nothing happens by chance and some how at a later point in time the answers will be revealed to you. You’ve heard the phrase, “Yours is not to ask the reason why?” Well, hard to do, really hard but trusting everything happens for a reason might be a step in the right direction and not losing hope your stronghold.

Five questions to ask and to pay attention to the answers coming back. Step forward equipped with WHO you are, WHERE you are going, WHAT your life is about, WHY things happen and WHEN you do, maybe the secret of life will be revealed to you. Not holding my breath but it’s worth a try.

HAVE AN AMAZING DAY.

Half-Hearted Connections

“You don’t deserve a half-hearted love. You don’t deserve someone who can only promise you pieces and not the whole. You don’t deserve someone who’s walking around investing time in other some ones. You don’t deserve a person who can’t commit.” Marisa Donnelly

Have you ever fallen for an emotionally-unavailable man? Have you ever wondered why you’re on a roller-coaster ride of ups and downs and you don’t know if you’re coming or going? If you’re caught up in a never-ending cycle of being taken for a ride, it’s time to get off.

An emotionally unavailable man is typically defined as, “not willing or able to truly commit to you and be loyal to you. This type of man will often want to keep things casual and undefined so as to not deal with any of the emotional components that go into a long-term relationship.”

The problem is even though these men are not available, it doesn’t stop them from being out there on the dating scene. They don’t want long-term but pretend that they do. They send out mixed signals and at times it seems like they want “forever” but it is more in their mind than anything else. The message they deliver is a confusing one and just when you think that you’ve found the one, they’ll show you different in a not so nice way. They’re there one minute, ghost you the next or worse still take up with someone else right before your very eyes. This is a relationship where you’re the non-entity and it is all about them.

How do you know if they’re emotionally unavailable? Here are some signs according to Victoria Miretti.

They cannot say they are looking for a long term committed relaitonship.

They don’t court you.

They struggle to have emotional or in depth conversations.

Their words and actions don’t match.

They are inconsistent.

You don’t experience a steady upward progression in the relationship.

I had the unfortunate experience of meeting one such person. He walked in like a hurricane ready to sweep everything away in his path and I was just coming out of a storm. He had all the makings of “the guy.” The relationship if you can call it that took off like a whirlwind but each time we got close, he took 10 steps back. I noticed the hesitation and put it down to fear because I was feeling the same thing. The problem was I was willing to settle for crumbs knowing full well that they were crumbs because I was coming from a place of lack myself. Having just lost a special someone, I was looking for a relationship. It was a perfect meeting of the minds. The only problem, it wasn’t enough and I knew what a good relationship should look like. This one was sorely lacking but I put up with the charade.

“Life is too short for half-hearted connections and meaningless run-throughs.” Unknown

Low-effort men do not invest in you because they can’t. They find it easy to walk away and take up with someone new in a matter of days or more specifically even before the relationship has ended because their emotions don’t run very deep and hurting someone is part and parcel of how they operate. It is a place where nothing affects them because their heart is under lock and key. A no man’s land or rather a no woman’s land as far as they are concerned. So why even be out there? I guess everyone needs love and if you hurt someone along the way what’s the big deal, right? The problem is, it is a big deal to the person who gets hurt in the process.

“Never put them first, if you always come last. Never give your all, if you only get half.” Unknown

If you’ve read my article, “Dating No-Gooders,” you’ll know that they are out there along with all the others that give “dating” a bad name. One false move will get you to where you don’t want to be. If you’re looking for Mr. Right, know that it is a dangerous world out there so step lightly. If he’s unavailable and shows the signs from the get go, leave him alone and move on. Some people cannot love you the way you want to be loved AND you’re too valuable to settle for anything less or for half-hearted connections.

How do you know if he’s emotionally available? According to singleover30.net, here are some signs to look out for.

If a man is present with you when he is with you, that’s a good sign.

This is not always true from my experience. The person I knew was all there when we spent time together and gave me the impression that he wasn’t shying away from anything but he was emotionally unavailable and hence the confusion.

He is comfortable talking about his feelings.

He is willing to talk about the progression of the relationship.

He won’t waste your time with half-hearted promises.

He will be interested in you and your life.

He prioritizes spending time with you.

Therapist: You saw the red flags though, right?

Me: I thought it was a carnival.

That says it all.

Have an amazing day.

Know Your Self Worth

“Recognize your own worth and you won’t be drawn to those who don’t see it.” Doe Zantamata

According to medium.com, “Your value is directly linked to your belief. If you treat yourself like garbage, you’ll never appreciate your potential.”

It’s interesting how many of us walk into relationships expecting the other person to validate us in some way. We look to them to make us feel wanted, to feel loved, to feel that we are worthy and to make us feel special. Basically we hand over our power and energy to that person and wait to get reimbursed. When it doesn’t happen, we find ourselves in a dark place and beat ourselves down to a pulp.

The truth is, self-worth is your sense of self, your values and your belief that you are worthy of care, support and compassion. It basically means you value yourself enough to know the boundaries and limits and what you’ll accept and what you won’t. It is that feeling within you that says you are worthy and deserving of the right kind of love and that there is a balance in the relationship. If you’ve been doing the chasing and you’re the only one investing in the relationship with your time, energy and efforts and you are not getting or getting next to nothing in return, then it’s time to reevaluate and to take a good hard look at your self-worth. How much is it worth?

“Love yourself enough to set boundaries. Your time and energy are precious. You get to choose how you use it. You teach people how to treat you by deciding what you will and won’t accept.” Anna Taylor

If your self-worth is lacking, here are some strategies to improve it from the people in the know. (verywellmind.com)

Do things you enjoy and are good at:

These help to reinforce your strengths and abilities and can make you more confident.

Exercise and challenge yourself:

Physical activity is linked to a greater sense of self-worth. It also helps to recalibrate your mindset and offers both physical and mental benefits.

Challenge negative thoughts:

Thoughts are not facts. Next time you have a negative self-thought, think of an alternative realistic thought to replace it.

Be kind to yourself.

Learn to be assertive.

Start saying “no!” I have to learn this one myself.

Focus on the positive.

It is important to have a healthy sense of self-worth because loving, respecting and valuing yourself starts with you. It is the first step towards gaining the same from others.

“Once you discover your true worth, walking away from where you are not valued will become the easiest hard thing you will ever do.” Unknown

If they don’t see you as valuable then don’t try to convince them. Remember the only person you need validation from is you. You are enough as you are, you are worthy, you deserve respect, your well-being matters and so does your emotional health. Work on your self-worth and you’ll start attracting the right kind of people, the kind who will respect your worth.

“When you realize your self-worth you’ll stop giving people discounts.” Unknown

AND

“Know your worth and then make sure to add tax.” Unknown

Have an amazing day.