love – Page 19 – Site Title

Life is Fragile

“When you see how fragile and delicate life can be, all else fades into the background.” Jenna Morasca

I got a call from a friend yesterday. She told me that she had been in the hospital for a week. All is well with her but it was a scary experience. It brought home the fact that life in all its beauty is still as fragile as can be.

A year and a half ago, I lost someone very close to me. We never thought that life with all its idiosyncrasies would throw a curveball. One so large and unexpected that when all was said and done, only one of us would be left standing to carry on.

The walk in the snow-covered world was exhilarating. Everything was covered in white and the trees looked like pictures out of a postcard. It also brought back times when we had taken those walks together. The times when snowball fights and laughter reigned supreme. Little did we know then that life as we knew it was about to change forever.

“You never think the last time is the last time. You think that there will be more. You think you have forever. But then life can quickly remind you, you don’t” Grey’s Anatomy

What if we knew that life was short? What then? Would we try to cram as much living as we can into today? Perhaps knowing just how fragile life is should make us stop and take notice, to stop procrastinating and to do and say the things we need to say before it is too late. I wish I had.

Today as I approach the top of the hill, I remember that snow-filled day as you said, “I want a selfie with the both of us in it.” We were laughing in the picture. Now I realize that there will be no more pictures, no more memories to be made and no more laughter to be shared. You’ve gone on a different journey.

I’ve said many things to you since you’ve been gone. Nothing seems enough, perhaps one day it will be and memories of you will fade and I will be at peace. Here are more of the same, more of what I wished I had said when you were here.

Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for all the times we shared. Thank you for showing me just how much love you could squeeze into that little amount of time. Thank you for showing me that I was an important part of your life. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Life is fragile. All it takes is one wrong move, one unexpected turn of events and like a candle in the wind, it can be snuffed out never to be relit again. Forever is not in its vocabulary and neither is invincible. Knowing that we should make time for the important things in life, free up space by letting go of the unimportant ones and take the time to say and do the things you need to do before it is too late.

YOU ARE ENOUGH

“You are enough, just as you are.” Meghan Markle

The Duchess of Sussex shared this quote in an interview and how right she is.

How many times have we questioned if we are really enough? How many times have we said if only I was thinner, prettier, more popular, had more friends than life would be better, simpler and I would be enough. More times than you can count on your fingers right? I know I have.

I think to be enough you have to start by loving yourself first. It is not about what society expects of you, the impossible goals it puts out there so that achieving some of them takes us to never never land and leaves us wanting but never quite attaining what is the norm or considered the norm in today’s society of much ado about nothing.

Beyonce said:

“Your self-worth is determined by you. You don’t have to depend on someone telling you who you are.”

I will add, love yourself first and you’re halfway there. Look in the mirror and give yourself a big hug and say, “I love you warts and all!” Yes warts because we do carry those unseen warts around with us. Just the other day someone said to me, “You are your worst critic.” He is right but more appropriately I am my own worst enemy. When I look into that mirror first thing in the morning, I see all that is wrong and those warts, those invisible ones take shape and have the power to obliterate if I allow them. These days, I see someone genuine with potential staring back at me. I smile, give myself a hug and go on my way.

So many of us go through life carrying the burden of I don’t measure up. It is easy to do in this world of ours where perfection and beauty are key buzzwords and measuring up is an uphill task. However, these are just two words. Honesty, integrity, dependability, good-heartedness, helpfulness and so on are all words that carry so much worth that they have the power to blow those two other words, beauty and perfection to kingdom come! Look at you, the real you and you will know that you my friend are enough as you are.

Someone close to me said, “I don’t know if I can make it.” Despair, frustration and a fear of the future are the monsters he will have to slay. He’s at a standstill but this is nothing new. I’ve been there and so have you when the day seems unfathomable and all you want to do is turn out the light, shut out the world and go within yourself and stay there for awhile.

“Today I feel like putting on the “OUT OF ORDER” sticker on my head and going back to bed.” Unknown

However, the trick is in knowing when to crawl out of bed, remove that sign and take life by its reins and to say, “I am enough as I am. You won’t defeat me!”

You are capable, you have the power within you to achieve the impossible and you my friend are stronger than you think!

YOU ARE ENOUGH!

“My mission should I choose to accept it, is to find peace with exactly who and what I am. To take pride in my thoughts, my appearance, my talents, my flaws and to stop this incessant worrying that I can’t be loved as I am.” Anais Nin

Finding Love

Love is elusive, it has been said. It is hard to pin down said another. Sometimes it hides in plain sight but it is the one thing that we can’t live without says the heart. Sure, we can pretend that it doesn’t matter if we have love or not and convince ourselves that it is absolutely alright but in those moments when all is quiet and looking up at the night sky lit up with a million stars that is when your heart reminds you that there is more to life than standing here all alone surrounded by such beauty. It is at these moments that your heart yearns for something more, someone to hold, someone to share hugs and kisses with and that one special someone who will finally complete you.

“It’s impossible,” said pride.

“It’s risky,” said experience.

“It’s pointless,” said reason.

“Give it a try,” whispered the heart. Unknown.

Giving it a try is easy. Taking the risk, we’ve all tried that. Impossible and pointless? I don’t know about that but I’m on the search for love, true love. Not the “whishy washy” variety that disguises itself as love but in reality is far from it. This kind of love has the potential to break your heart in two or more pieces if given the chance but I’m looking for the type that can weather any storm. However, I have the tendency to jump in with both feet where love is concerned but I am learning as I go along. The solution could be that we need to stop doing this.

“Stop planting flowers in peoples yards who aren’t going to water them.” Hylyrikz.com

How many times have we done that? Plenty? I know I’ve done that many times knowing full well that I was stepping on dangerous ground. Yet, I kept on doing it saying, “It has potential, it could be what I’ve been looking for.” And what is that?” you might ask. Is it someone who treats you like you are ordinary? You deserve much more and I deserve much more than that. Ordinary is not my thing, has never been and will never be my thing. If someone you love treats you as “ordinary” it is time to move on and look for that someone who shows you that you are “extraordinary.”

“If he misses you, he’ll call.

If he wants you, he’ll say it.

If he cares, he’ll show it.

And if not, he can’t be worth your time.” Unknown.

This quote says it all. The journey to finding love is hard enough but if you have someone who doesn’t show you all of the above, it is time to move on. Love is not about you chasing someone with no reciprocation in return. It is the meeting of minds and of hearts but it is so much more. The caring will show if the love is there. Pay attention to what is shown because it will show you the reality of the situation. Which brings me to the last part.

“Never apologize for trusting your intuition – your brain can play tricks, your heart can blind, but your gut is always right.” Rachel Wolchin

Listen to your gut, we’ve heard that often enough right? How often have we turned our backs on it? I know I have more times than I can count on the fingers of one hand. It was my way of turning a blind eye when the truth was staring me in the face. I walked down paths I should not have and at times the pain was unbearable but I had only myself to blame. Pay attention to that gut feeling, it only has your best interest at heart.

The path I am on is scary, the unknown always is but armed with what I have learned from 2023, I am confident that I am headed in the right direction. I just need to keep putting one foot in front of the other, take a couple of deep breaths and keep on moving. If I stumble along the way and fall which I know I will, it is alright, I will gather up yet another lesson learned and keep moving to the finish line. The end goal is finding love, the kind that will last a lifetime not just for the here and now. When I do find that elusive someone it will not be about completing me but more about adding to who I am and making me feel absolutely extraordinary!

There is hope.