I do love Sundays. It is a day of rest and meant for time well-spent with family, friends and yourself. Well, it should be and every weekend before Sunday rolls around wearing bells and whistles, I have exactly that in mind but it never works out that way.
I had that talk with Chachi, the cat, and you guessed it, it went in one ear and out the other! The little guy in the fur coat marches to a different drumbeat and he makes his own rules! Last night started out well enough and the little rascal toed the line until he decided that it was not something a cat should be expected to do, toe the line that is. He was off and running and kept me up most of the night with his antics. I decided to let it roll off my back like water off a duck’s back. If you can’t beat them join them…..well, I decided to let him have his way and went into a nirvana state of mind but only in my head, everything else was riled up and revving to go! You guessed how my night went.
I even went to bed wearing a t-shirt that said:
SUNDAY CHECKLIST
EAT AND DO NOTHING
DO NOTHING AND CHILL
CHILL AND SLEEP
No luck there. Reading is not what he is about. He, the little munchkin, was up at his usual time and his first cry was, “Mommy!” We went downstairs at around 5:30 and I made my breakfast with my well-meaning t-shirt full of creases just like my dreams of having a cozy time in bed! Now, I am sitting at the computer and the little guy just came back up and jumped on the chair behind me and has his back up against me! Mommy’s boy? Definitely!
Sundays are meant for relaxing and I’m going to make it so. It is storming outside and it feels cold inside the house. I’m happy about the rain because the ground has been parched and a good dousing would do a world of good as far as the plant world is concerned. So rain on! I’m going to get my second cup of coffee and TRY to CHILL!
We know that love is elusive. We also know that it morphs and changes shape and just when you think you’ve found the one and only, it goes and shows you something different.
If you’ve got both feet firmly planted in the dating scene, you’re bound to meet one of the following types who give love a bad name sooner than later.
The Egoist
This guy is full of himself. Good looks are his calling card and he thinks the world revolves around him or rather he has women swooning at his feet. Well, the truth is they are at his beck and call because in a world where looks matter, he’s all the rage. However, peel away the outer layer and you’ll find more often than not that he’s sorely lacking in a couple of very important aspects. Sometimes looks disguise what is not there. If you’re a smart woman, it takes but a couple of dates to find out that the man of your dreams has an empty shell. If you’re looking for intelligent conversation and looking to hang on to his every word, THIS GUY IS NOT IT! Move on.
Mr. Trigger-Happy
This type may seem to have it all at first glance but that is where it ends. Give him a little time and some rope and he’ll gladly hang himself! All it takes with this dude to show his true self is to have a normal conversation, well what others might call normal but with this guy it’s like playing the Russian roulette. You’ll never know what rubbed him up the wrong way because everything does! He’s just waiting to unload all the years of repressed anger he’s held back and BOOM he’s off and running. Mostly not in your direction because he’s looking for someone to blame for all his problems. Love is the last thing on his mind. RUN and don’t look back!
The Conundrum
This guy is a headache and a half. He walks in like a hurricane, falls like a ton of bricks and is talking the “M” word before the first date is over! You’ll be wondering what hit you! Certainly not love but a corrupted form of something else. He’ll look into your eyes and ask, “Why don’t I see sparkles in them?” Or he’ll want to stick to you like glue and you can only take a breath until he does! If you’re looking for the nice, easy, relaxing type of love, it’s not with him. It’ll only get worse so move on and keep on walking and don’t look back!
Mr. Past & Present
Okay, this is one to watch out for. He has one foot firmly planted in the past. I mean it is cemented to the past. However, he is looking to connect with someone in the present. You’ll find he is either hung up on his dead wife, a past love or just about anything in the PAST as an excuse as to why he can’t fall in love again but if it comes to doing everything else he is willing and ready. Bring up the “M” word and he’s off and running. Scary? It is. Tread carefully because his true self doesn’t show up until you’re fully in and just when you think things are going great and there’s a future, he’ll pull the rug from under your feet. You’ll be left asking, what happened? It’s not you, it’s him. Move with caution or better still RUN!
This thing called love is impossible at times and at other times, it takes a lot of work to land what you’re looking for. Unfortunately, you’ll have to fall a few times, pick yourself back up, kiss more than a few frogs, dance the Tango with those I mentioned above, and when the clock strikes 12, be thankful that you survived to live another day.
“Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.” Joan Crawford
With that in mind, proceed with caution and always with your eyes wide open and tell your heart to sit this one out until you’ve got it down pat. Getting it down to a science is next to impossible but arming yourself with the knowledge to outplay some of the no good types out there is a must!
Joe and Joan were sitting down to their usual morning cup of coffee listening to the weather report on the radio. “There will be 3 to 5 inches of snow today, and a snow emergency has been declared,” the weather report said. “You must park your cars on the odd numbered side of the streets.” Joe said, “Jeez, okay,” and got up from his coffee.
The next day they were sitting down with their morning cups of coffee. The weather forecast was, “There will be 2 to 4 inches of snow today, and a snow emergency has been declared. You must park your cars on the even numbered side of the streets.” Again Joe replied, “Jeez, okay,” and got up from his coffee.
Two days later, again they’re sitting down with their cups of coffee and the weather forecast said, “There will be 6 to 8 inches of snow today, and a snow emergency has been declared. You must park your cars on the …..” and the power went out and Joe didn’t get the rest of the instructions. He turned to Joan, “Jeez, what am I going to do now, Joan?”
Joan replied, “Aw, Joe, just leave the car in the darned garage today!”
Methinks they’ve got too much time on their hands!
“I think my wife is selling drugs,” a man told his friend.
“Yesterday I was running late for work and the phone rang. I answered it, but before I could say anything, a guy said, “Hey honey, is that dope gone yet?”
“My mission, should I choose to accept it, is to find peace with exactly who and what I am. To take pride in my thoughts, my appearance, my talents, my flaws and to stop this incessant worrying that I can’t be loved as I am.” Anais Nin
MISSION ACCEPTED!
Right now, I’m choosing….
to believe that everything is working out in my favor
to focus on what I can control
to release what does not align with my vision of the future
to spend time with the people that make me feel safe
to meet my own needs
to take steps outside of my comfort zone
to find the good in every moment
to honor my boundaries
to stay in my own lane
to reflect on my life choices and choose better ones.
to stay consistent with the goals I set for myself
to be accepting of change
to prioritize my peace and happiness
to release unhealthy attachments
to enjoy the journey of life
to love myself exactly as I am
Unknown
That folks is exactly how you do it! Now, I have to convince this other me to get in sync and get with the program!
“What now is not just a panic-striken question tossed into a dark unknown. What now can also be our joy. It is a declaration of possibility of promise, of chance. It acknowledges that our future is open, that we may well do more than anyone expected of us, that at every point in our development we are still striving to grow.” Ann Patchett
However, I am at a point where I feel like I’m stuck in mud or more appropriately moving through thick gooey mud and each excruciating step forward is a struggle in itself. The cowardly me wants to throw up her hands and to stop, take a breath and spend the days sitting in the garden with only the birds, bees and the insects for company. I am SAFE.
That’s the conundrum right there. It is not about feeling safe. It is about finding that right guy and making the right decisions for my life. It takes work to get to the end goal and I know that the right person is not just going to fall into my lap like manna from heaven. It takes working on me, knowing what I want, what I won’t tolerate and when to say NO to those who are just a waste of time and a drain on my emotional resources. So far so good. Then the doubts started creeping in and along came the fears, the uncertainties but most of all not knowing where to go next has been bugging me for the last week or so. I’m where Alice was when she had that conversation with the Cheshire Cat. It goes like this:
Alice: “Would you tell me please, which way I ought to go from here?”
Cheshire Cat: “That depends a good deal on where you want to get to.”
Alice: “I don’t much care where.”
Cheshire Cat: “Then it doesn’t matter which way you go.”
Alice: “So long as I get somewhere.”
Cheshire Cat: “Oh, you’re sure to do that, if only you walk long enough.”
I don’t want to keep moving forward if “somewhere” is going to be good enough. It isn’t and neither is aimless wandering. I have a specific goal in mind. Perhaps, this wading through mud is normal in the grand scheme of things and not everything is going to go as smoothly as I want it to go. When has it ever? So why not stop and take that well-deserved break? I’ve been working hard on discarding the “old me” and I see someone new emerging from the shadows. She is stronger, more decisive and she knows what she wants. There is still work to be done but I have a feeling it will all fall in place when the time is right. The end goal is to get to the other side of the here and now. What would be waiting there? I don’t know but unlike Alice in Wonderland, this much I know. I care about where I’m headed.
“Sometimes not having any idea where we’re going works out better than we could possibly have imagined.” Unknown
A doctor started having an affair with his nurse. Shortly after this started, she announced that she had become pregnant. Not wanting his wife to find out, he gave her a large amount of money and asked her to go out of the country to Germany to wait out the pregnancy and have the baby over there.
“But how will you know when our baby is born?” she asked.
“Well,” he said, “after you’ve had the baby, just send me a postcard and write ‘sauerkraut’ on the back.”
Not knowing what else to do, she took the money and went off to Germany. Six months went by and then one day the doctor’s wife called him at his office.
“Dear, you received a very strange postcard in the mail today,” she explained. “I don’t understand what it means!”
“Just wait until I get home and I’ll read it,” he replied. Later that evening, the doctor came home and read his postcard, which said:
“Sauerkraut, Sauerkraut, Sauerkraut. Two with wieners. One without!”
If you’re looking for ways to transform your life, here are five tips that will get you on your way. These five rules come from Buddhist teachings and if applied daily and in the mornings before your daily grind starts or even before having your first cup of coffee, they will help you to see life in a different light. I’ve been practicing these five rules for about a week now and it has made me calmer, more in tune with myself and believe it or not, my mind is under control as well!
Find a quiet spot and take three deep breaths to center yourself. Repeat each affirmation two or three times to let it sink in and take hold.
I am grateful for this new day.
Really simple but not so simple for some of us. Gratefulness needs to be learned and if practiced daily, it can transform your life in a positive way. Come up with one or two things you are grateful for and go from there.
Let go of yesterday.
This is a hard one. How often do we carry “yesterday” and all its disappointments, anger and sadness like an albatross around our necks? More often than not is the answer. Let go and let yesterday lie where it should. It is done with and today is a brand new day to make it all better.
I am calm and in control of my mind.
It has been said, “Rule your mind or it will rule you.” This simply means, “you have the power to train your thoughts and control your mental state, rather then being controlled by your thoughts and emotions.” Be in the present and use conscious effort to train your mind to shape the thoughts you entertain. “Nothing can harm you as much as your own thoughts unguarded.” Guard them with care.
I will respond with kindness today.
Listen without judgment or interruption. Show appreciation for the people around you and an act of goodwill doesn’t hurt either. Wear a smile while you’re doing it and change the world one act at a time.
Everything is temporary.
Know that change is inevitable, it will come whether you want it or not. Nothing is forever except change so learn to let go when it happens. Accepting impermanence can help you to appreciate the present moment and adjust to new situations as they happen.
Five rules to live by but it takes practice to get it down pat and to apply it to your life. Not easy but with practice it is doable. Good luck and see you on the other side of a life well-lived! 👍
It’s Saturday and time for another dose of laughter. Enjoy!
A husband and his wife were sound asleep when suddenly the phone rang. The husband picked up the phone and said, “Hello? How the heck do I know? What do I look like, a weatherman?” He then slammed the phone down and settled into bed.
“Who was that?” asked his wife.
“I don’t know. It was some guy who wanted to know if the coast was clear”
A husband walks into Victoria’s Secret to purchase a sheer negligee for his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price –the more sheer, the higher the price. Naturally, he opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500 and takes it home. He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him.
Upstairs the wife thinks (she’s no dummy), ‘I have an idea. It’s so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won’t put it on, but I’ll do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for myself.’
She appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose. The husband says, “Good grief! You’d think for $500, they’d at least iron it!”
He never heard the shot. Funeral on Thursday at noon.
I’m not big on poems but this one touched a chord within me. It talks about all the things we do when “struggling with loss, pain, grief, change and transition.” It also talks about how releasing the need to control situations and emotions can be liberating. We often hold on when we should let go and we have those memories on speed redial. The wound never heals but what if we can just let it go “like a leaf falling from a tree?” Anyway, this poem is about letting go and learning to move on.
SHE LET GO
Without a thought or a word, she let go.
She let go of the fear, she let go of the judgments. She let go of the opinions swarming around her head. She let go of the committee of indecision within her. She let go of all the ‘right’ reasons. Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go…….
No one was around when it happened. There was no applause or congratulations. No one thanked her or praised her. No one noticed a thing. Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.
There was no effort. There was no struggle. It wasn’t good and it wasn’t bad. It was what it was, and it is just that. In the space of letting go, she let it all be.
A small smile came over her face. A light breeze blew through her. And the sun and the moon shone forevermore.
Rev. Safire Rose
LET IT GO (whatever it is) and have an amazing day.
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