Couldn’t have said it better myself. Time to put those items into practice. The hardest, as far as I am concerned, will be the last one. I do overanalyze everything to the point that I start out with something small and by the time I finish with it, it has been blown to gigantic proportions.
“To me, a rich and satisfying life means one full of contrast. Give me sleep ins. And soft rains. Coffee shops and conversation. But also adrenaline and adventure. And drunken bellows to the stars. I am determined to embrace this extravagant life for all that it has to offer.” Beau Taplin
It wasn’t a great day for a walk, grey clouds were gathering and as promised rain was on the way. What a difference a day makes, weather-wise. Yesterday it was picture perfect, warm and absolutely mesmerizing but today it had turned tables and was ready to show another side, a grey and wet one. There was no beauty to speak off as I trudged nonchalantly through the muddy and leaf-strewn path heading for the forest line. Oh, but I was wrong for I had only to open my mind and my senses to see the contrasts between a beautiful day and a bad one. To my surprise, each had its own brand of beauty if only I wasn’t so quick to pass judgement.
The not so subtle rustling of the leaves caught in the interplay of wind and absolute silence was balm for my anxious soul. I needed peace but somehow it was missing today. Glancing into the forest, I noticed that it was quiet, too quiet. The trees were tight-knit and hidden in shadows of its own making echoing the onslaught of rain that was to come. I usually don’t like walking close to the forest because a feeling of unease usually envelops me and my senses are usually on high alert as it was today. There was no room to relax. I walked on in silence and in the distance, the hoot of an owl could be heard. I welcomed the distraction and made my way to the stream. It’s gorgeous in spring, its banks overflowing with golden daffodils but today it droned on in silence, devoid of color as the slow-moving water made its way to the pond where the storks gather. Today, there was not one stork to be seen. They too had gone hiding from the oncoming force of nature. Standing at the tiny wooden bridge, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. It was peaceful but the unease was still there. Enclosed spaces are not my cup of tea and neither are deep dark forests. I moved on, got back on the path and made it to the fields.
My mind began to relax as I took in the wild open spaces before me. I was free again and standing at the bottom of the hill as I took in the panoramic view. It was grandiose even through there was no sun to speak of, only a light purple haze enveloping the distant mountains. It was beautiful just the same. Just a different kind of beautiful.
Contrasts are necessary to show the light and dark aspects of life and today nature decided to show my jaded mind, come rain or sunshine, there is always something beautiful about each aspect if only I would open my mind to it and embrace it with open arms to reap the full benefits. The rest of the walk was uneventful, an ordinary walk but my mind knew that if I kept my eyes peeled, I would capture the extraordinary. It was just a matter of time and if nature was willing to throw it my way. As the first droplets of rain hit the muddy path, I pulled my jacket tighter around me and ran back home leaving nature to do what it does best.
The ebb and flow of life was at work and who was I a mere mortal to question the order of the day or how it was brought about to life. Just accept and enjoy was the message and I bowed my head to its all-knowing wisdom. I was at peace.
Anxiety is defined as, “a natural response to pressure, feeling afraid or threatened, which can show up in how we feel physically, mentally, and in how we behave. It’s common to describe anxiety as a feeling of dread, fear or unease, which can range from mild to severe.”
It can also be a normal reaction to stress and it walks in and stays for awhile sometimes making your daily existence a living hell. It can overwhelm at times but the mild variety doesn’t stay for too long. Occasional anxiety is normal and it dissolves when whatever got you “hyped up” dissipates.
“Our anxiety does not come from thinking about the future, but from wanting to control it.” Khalil Gibran
Sound familiar? Something is not working right and there we go. Sweating, breathing hard and to make matters worse, we stay fixated on the problem wanting to control the outcome. I’ve been having such episodes lately. I love fixing things and sometimes even before they happen! When it doesn’t go as planned, my thoughts get erratic, I experience restlessness, and irritability. I’ve been looking at ways to not let “anxiety” get the better of me. One method is to focus your thoughts on things that bring “good vibes” into your being. The other is to exercise for all you’re worth or to just get out in nature, breathe and let go. If that doesn’t work, here’s something that might just do the trick.
Mantra for anxiety:
“Anxiety isn’t you. It’s something moving through you. It can leave out of the same door it came in.” James Clear
AND
“Trust yourself. You’ve survived a lot, and you’ll survive whatever is coming.” Robert Tew
I like what Dr. Lucy Russell has to say about this topic.
“We have anxious thoughts because the brain is trying to keep us alive. To the brain, survival is much more important than happiness. So, the brain often conjures up worst case scenarios and “what ifs”, so that we can prepare for disaster. The trouble is, the brain regularly gets it wrong.”
All that preparation for nothing? Well, sometimes it is and at other times, it is needed to wade through the murky waters of anxiety.
How do you lessen anxiety naturally?
You can practice mindfulness, try different breathing techniques to calm the nervous system, practice daily meditation and use guided imagery to lessen the stress and to get clarity on the problem at hand.
If that fails, try the following.
“Breathe. You’re going to be okay. You’ve gotten through so many things in your life. YOU’VE GOT THIS.” Karen Salmansohn
The king wanted to go fishing, and he asked the royal weather forecaster the forecast for the next few hours. The palace meteorologist assured him that there was no chance of rain.
So the king and the queen went fishing. On the way he met a man with a fishing pole riding on a donkey, and he asked the man if the fish were biting.
The fisherman said, “Your Majesty, you should return to the palace! In just a short time I expect a huge rainstorm.”
The king replied: “I hold the palace meteorologist in high regard. He is an educated and experienced professional. Besides, I pay him very high wages. He gave me a very different forecast. I trust him.”
So the king continued on his way. However, in a short time a torrential rain fell from the sky The King and Queen were totally soaked.
Furious, the king returned to the palace and gave the order to fire the meteorologist. Then he summoned the fisherman and offered him the prestigious position of royal forecaster.
The fisherman said, “Your Majesty, I do not know anything about forecasting. I obtain my information from my donkey. If I see my donkey’s ears drooping, it means with certainty that it will rain.”
So the king hired the donkey.
And thus began the practice of hiring dumb asses to work in influential positions of government.
“It’s you versus you. Meaning you’re the only thing standing in your way.” Amber Tamblyn
The battle lines are often drawn when it comes to facing life’s adversities, difficulties and the unknown. How often do you say, “This is too hard to handle or I can’t do this!” Life’s uncertainties are often met with, I am unworthy, I am too small, I am insignificant, I am not pretty enough, I am not capable, I am not enough and so on. We come up with so many excuses as to why we can’t achieve something or why it is impossible but if truth be told, we make mountains out of molehills. I often point my fingers at everything but myself. I become small and that problem, whatever it is, changes shape and becomes a mountain. It doesn’t matter that the mountain is of my own making, it’s there and it seems insurmountable.
What if we take a step back and view it from a different angle? Is it still insurmountable? How about if we changed our mindset to one of “I can” instead of “I can’t?” I know some problems are huge and they remain huge no matter which way you look at it but there are others that become that way because the “you” the negative “you” sees it that way and so it looms larger than life and once that negative mindset takes hold, it is all downhill from there. I’ve started looking at problems as just that. They are problems yes but I’ve decided to downsize them. I give them a cursory glance at first then I break it down into pieces and tackle it that way. Gone are the days of heart-thumping and end-of-the-world theatrics. No, it hasn’t made the problem any less of a problem but breaking it down does make it more manageable. Perhaps we need to remember it is not you vs. you but YOU working with you to come up with a solution, one that is workable.
It has been said you are your own worst enemy but what if you become your own best friend? Wouldn’t life be so much easier not to mention simpler? Here are some tips on how to do exactly that from the mindful.org.
When you look at the mirror, appreciate the unique person staring back at you – there’s never been another you!
When you talk to yourself, be friendly! Be understanding! NEVER BE MEAN!
When you need lovin’, give yourself a self-hug. Don’t knock it ’till you try it!
Don’t be shy to use your name and tell yourself that you love you.
Make a date with yourself to do something kind and caring.
Make yourself laugh.
Take time for contemplative practices that help you stay tuned in to your body, mind and emotions so that you might always be able to access your inner wisdom.
Idowu Koyenikan had this to say about problems.
“Mountains are only a problem when they are bigger than you. You should develop yourself so much that you become bigger than the mountains you face.”
If all else fails, you can give the “you” that is causing you problems a boot out the door! That should do it. Easier said than done I know and finally, YOU AREENOUGH AS YOU ARE so don’t underestimate yourself.
Photo by Jose Ricardo Barraza Morachis on Pexels.com
A man walks into a barber shop and says, “I’ll have a shave and a shoe shine.”
The barber lathers his face and sharpens the straight edge while a woman with the biggest, most beautiful breasts he has ever seen kneels down and shines his shoes.
The man says, “You and I should spend some time in a hotel room.”
She replies, “My husband wouldn’t like that.”
The man says, “Tell him you’re working overtime, and I’ll pay you the difference.”
It is a name that is sweet and unassuming but she is packing a punch! Winter storm Ellie has stomped in wearing her winter boots and holding most of Germany hostage. The German Weather Service (DWD) has issued an official warning and upped it to “Red Warning Level: Storm “Ellie” brings train cancellations, black ice and extreme risk of falls,” add up to ten centimeters of fresh snow, freezing rain, and strong gusts of wind and you know what Ellie is about, not as sweet as her name implies.
“Experts are warning of chaos on the roads as well as dangerous conditions on the highways. The north and east of Germany will be particularly affected with temperatures dropping to minus six degrees in persistent frost.”
Looking out my window, I see that strong gusts of wind are at play bending the willow tree in the neighbor’s garden like it was nothing! No snow yet but it is predicted for this evening and should stay till tomorrow. This means I will be on snow duty again, snow shovel in one hand and a bowl of salt in the other! Honestly, I am getting a little tired of it but as I was reminded by a neighbor, “It is winter.” Yes, it is.
Last year, we had very little snow but this year it is making up for it. Not only that, it is adding freezing rain and ice to the mixture. Chachi, the cat has been complaining about his TV acting up all the time! He doesn’t understand what is going on outside. Sometimes it is white outside and at other times, the wind is howling like a banshee. He has decided to leave it alone and has found refuge in his basket. Sleeping most of the day is the norm now.
I’m trying to keep myself occupied and I am grateful that I don’t have to be out in this weather, however, it is getting old and I want “Ellie” out of here as soon as possible!
“Nature gives to every time and season some beauties of its own.” Charles Dickens
The weather forecasters have been predicting bad weather and it’s finally here. After a day or two of freezing rain mixed in with snow, heavy snowfall has moved in! Yes folks, it’s a white world outside covered in about 3 inches of snow and it looks absolutely gorgeous if not for the work involved.
I was supposed to meet a friend for breakfast this morning, the first outing of the new year but had to cancel quickly. The streets were covered in snow and ice and more was coming down so I decided against it. No point taking the risk of slipping and falling.
Half an hour ago, I bundled up ready to go out there to tackle the tedious job of clearing the sidewalk of snow and ice and salting it as well. Then a lightbulb went on in that busy mind of mine and I decided to use the leaf blower instead. It was a fantastic idea because it blew the snow to the side effortlessly and within 10 minutes I had everything cleared, and salted. It was a great buy and I am sure it will come in handy when more snow decides to roll in and keep us company. I’m not complaining, I LOVE snow! The trees are looking fantastic covered in white as well and I bet the fields will be a sight to behold. However, I am staying indoors today. Not taking the risk of slipping, falling, and hurting myself.
A friend just told me that they are snowed in as well. He lives about three hours away, so it seems like a major snowstorm has moved in. Hmm….last year, we had very little snow so I guess it is making up for it this year! It can stay for a while but NOT too long!
… to have his truck fixed.They thought it might have something to do with the transmission, so they couldn’t repair it while he waited.
He told the mechanics that he didn’t live far and would just walk home.On the way home, he stopped at a hardware store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose.
However, struggling outside the store, he now had a problem.How to carry his purchases home.Whilst he was scratching his head, he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost.She asked, “can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane?” The farmer said, ‘well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to this house. I would walk you there, but I can’t carry this lot.” The old lady suggested, “why don’t you do this? Put the can of paint in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in the other hand.”
“Well, thank you very much.That works just fine,” he said, and proceeded to walk the old girl home.
On the way, he said, “let’s take my usual shortcut and go down this alley.We’ll be there in no time.” The little old lady looked him over cautiously and said, “I’m a lonely widow without a husband to defend me.How do I know that when we get in the alleyway, you won’t have your wicked way with me?”
The farmer said with some irritation, “holy smokes, lady, I’m carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens and a goose. How in the world would I do that?”
The old lady said, “well, set the goose down, cover him with a bucket, put a can of paint on top of the bucket and I’ll hold the bloody chickens.”
We’re into Day 4 and I can’t help but ask, didn’t we just get started? Anyway, the wind is howling like a banshee outside and snow is in the forecast again. No walk today so I’m getting my writing in. Lots of coffee is also on the agenda.
I’m planning what this year is going to look like for me. No, I don’t know for sure but I have control over a few ideas. Trying to get a second children’s book out is on the table but I’m not sure yet. I have been collaborating with a publisher, a different one from the last one I used. I’m not happy with them and someone else is willing to work with me. The problem is, I don’t know if I want to go through the stress again. It involves a lot of things and I wanted this year to be quieter. Like nothing much to do at all!
If I give the go ahead, it will mean many things. Working with illustrators, proofreading, book layout, audio version which involves picking out the right voice and so on. Hmm….sounds interesting but I haven’t made up my mind yet.
Working on me is an ongoing project. I made headway last year and saw major improvements to the point that I was called “complicated,” and “arrogant!” Oh well, so be it. I know what I want and I won’t settle for anything less so call me whatever. I learned that I’m a pushover, too nice, too accommodating, willing to bend over backwards to please people and so on. This year, I’m changing some of those negative traits. I want to be stronger, I will stand my ground and will walk away if something is not contributing to my well-being. It will take courage and focus to do that but I come armed and ready to do battle! Well, maybe not battle, just to be steadfast in what I want.
Health is on the agenda as well. This year I’m upping the workouts, looking for more ways to stay healthy, and working on showing the “stress monster” the door is also on the list of things to do. I’m not going to let little things rattle me and I’m going to breathe and let go as much as possible of things that don’t matter. Let’s see if this will work out. I have good intentions and that matters.
Yes, the new year is trying to take off in leaps and bounds, as it usually does.
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